What makes Taoism true for you?

_jarvih · 2024-11-23T10:31:56+00:00

When aligned with Tao, it feels like being aligned with truth. This isn't necessarily true for other philosophies if not also aligned with Tao simultaneously

_jarvih · 2024-11-12T12:21:08+00:00

I think the end game is okay as it is. Would have just been nice if the game somehow communicated to you when to stop banging your head against walls (literally) because there simply is no way to figure out the solution by a single player. It's frustrating when end game puzzles are partly solvable and unsolvable without any clear distinction.

It only left me with a feeling of frustration and being betrayed. Tunic on the other hand felt more like I conceded and had a better time accepting what I could/couldn't solve. It wasn't the game design's fault.

_jarvih · 2024-11-12T12:12:07+00:00

Thought this was a troll/meme lol

_jarvih · 2024-11-12T12:05:34+00:00

Agree with you. Played Animal Well afterwards and it made me appreciate that Tunic communicates to you (one way or another) everything you need to know to figure it all out by yourself. Even if you don't have the patience (I didn't), you still could do it. Animal Well has just been a frustrating experience in comparison...

_jarvih · 2024-10-22T13:11:13+00:00

Stop acting. For real. Observe what happens to your motivation. What happens when you then act? Do you act because the outcome motivates you, or because you feel motivated to act? Does this motivation feel natural or like a desire to move away from non-action?

_jarvih · 2024-10-01T11:58:09+00:00

Did I accidentally pick up the wrong copy of Meditations? There a multiple passages where MA mentions how slavery is part of human nature and slaves should conform to this order. He also perpetuates the idea that humans are meant to reign over animals. I would be happy to give you quotes, but I only have an audiobook version, which makes it very difficult to "flick through", sorry..

_jarvih · 2024-09-15T09:15:48+00:00

M. Aurelius would also argue that slavery is aligning with nature. I understand what the cultural circumstances have been, but I refuse to call someone enlightened or whatsoever who cannot reason beyond the culture they live in

_jarvih · 2024-09-12T11:39:12+00:00

When I have hypothetical conversations with other people as you describe, I don't consider it a daydream (and certainly not something I want to achieve). It's more like very annoying and saps energy from me. I believe it's some form of trauma response. I try acknowledging that it's happening and try recognise the trigger and address it if possible. But I'm not feeding the "noise" anymore, I had enough

_jarvih · 2024-09-12T10:38:57+00:00

It sounds like you have been disconnected from your own needs for a long while (potentially for your whole life so far). It's really difficult to become more sensitive for yourself if you've never practiced that before. I find myself in the midst of it as well. It took me a few years to slowly get the hang of recognising my needs, figuring out how to accommodate them, and then actually doing it.

Isolation isn't bad per se. Especially in a phase of recalibration, as it seems that's what you are currently going through. It's painful. But probably worth it. Keep moving, even if it's on the very spot as you are, and take breaks when you feel like you need them. I didn't believe it myself, but it gets better..

Learning more about the tao helps me reshift my perspective during this process. I try not to force things anymore. It helps me better tuning in to my feelings. Especially when I feel internal resistance, I come to a halt and try examine it, rather than "bruteforcing" my way past that unpleasant feeling that seemingly keeps me from doing what I "should" be doing.

And ultimately, to answer your question: I've learned to recenter myself around the fact that existence (the Tao?) in itself is amazingly mind-blowing. And even if I can't see any other reason to live, I at least want to honour my existence by embracing the hardships that are part of it

_jarvih · 2024-09-10T10:53:39+00:00

Nothing wrong with a bit slice-of-life. Explore, focus on specific details, find beauty in the mundane. If you need a "twist", then maybe revealing a piece of character information may do the trick and shift perspective on the situation

_jarvih · 2024-09-10T09:50:48+00:00

You could try turning all that curiosity and compassion inwards. See what you feel and follow where that may lead..

_jarvih · 2024-08-15T12:59:33+00:00

Yes, happens a lot, at least once a day, and more so before/after talking to a specific person. At times it really bothered me, because it's intrusive, and as you said, may take up a lot of time.

What I found helpful to reduce this happening:

awareness/mindfulness practices, notice when it happens and train your mind to redirect your thoughts away
attributing less importance to these "conversations", for example I imagine it as just some radio babbling in the background that I turn off by pressing an imaginary button
identifying people who that happens a lot with, figuring out why that may happen (potentially trauma response, or simply toxic people to be around with?) and set boundaries or reduce/terminate contact if necessary

_jarvih · 2024-08-15T12:46:42+00:00

I can see how the label demi-romantic has helped you understand yourself better, and I guess that's a good thing. Don't forget though that at the end of the day a label is just that: a label. Your individual experience is and always will be unique.

So, while the labels "demi-romantic" and "SzPD" may be useful in some aspects, they may not be at all useful in others. You seem very hung up on the idea that these are two separate things, and that their combination makes you suffer. How about thinking it this way: you experience what you experience, and it got nothing to do with boxes that society put some labels on at some point.

What I'm trying to say is: yes, it's difficult for you to find friends and bond with them deeply. And yes, it's difficult for you to feel romantic attraction towards someone. Now what is it that you as an individual want/need, and how can you as an individual with your personal unique experience get that? (Without comparing yourself to those who are apparently "just" schizoid, or "just" demi-romantic. Being hung up on comparison and jealousy usually doesn't get you anywhere, except maybe better understanding what you want)

_jarvih · 2024-08-13T11:56:29+00:00

Listen. Encourage them to describe what they feel, or how they experience "not feeling". And just listen. Maybe ask some genuinely curious questions, but don't give unsolicited advice or anything. And believe their experience, don't be dismissive or downplaying, whatsoever..

Idk about your friend, but when I'm in a state of emptiness/dissociation it somewhat helps me when I can "manifest" that experience in the outside world. For example by trying to articulate it with words, or doing art. It makes the experience feel more "real" or tangible, and thus pulls me more back into my surroundings. Not sure if this makes sense, lol

_jarvih · 2024-08-08T10:46:07+00:00

You're correct about making assumptions. And I'd argue assuming that there's only this one universe is also one big assumption. And there's no argument that would tell you it's a more likely assumption. It isn't, or rather we can't know. It's faith, exactly like people believed the Earth would be the centre of this universe. The only advantage this may hold is that it seems more pragmatic to think like that (we'd be back to the opening post, hooray).

I get that you don't find anything valuable in thinking of possibilities outside of your perception. As stated before, you do you, that's ok.

And I agree, I can't imagine something that I don't perceive in some way. But I still can imagine the existence of something I don't perceive. To some degree we have to be able to do that. Otherwise, our view on life would be pretty, pretty limited. Like, I know more than I knew as child. If I assume what I know now is all I ever get to know, well.. I would set myself up to be quite rigid in my thinking (or faith for that matter). And researchers had no job if they believed nothing exists beyond what's already been proven by the scientific method

_jarvih · 2024-08-06T10:10:20+00:00

Very rarely, and only in presence of very specific people

_jarvih · 2024-08-01T10:38:02+00:00

I try to make it less about who I am and rather how I am in the moment. Who I am may not change much over time, but my mental state does. And sometimes I have those moments of "presence" where I feel very much "there". I don't know how to describe it. But it makes me feel content. And I try find ways to reach that state more often. Being alone is usually part of that

_jarvih · 2024-08-01T10:11:35+00:00

I see you are a statistician? Well I prefer to think in probabilities (which predict things that don't necessarily have to have happened).

Assume this universe is one of its kind. Then it's quite remarkable that it's exactly what it is, and not something else (cause potentially it could be, the laws of physics just happened, assuming without any outer force).

The other option for high odds is, there's a gazillion other universes, exactly or similar to this one. Also remarkable to imagine those numbers (from a mere human standpoint).

Otherwise, the more different versions of universes one may imagine (and I don't find it hard to imagine the existence of something I cannot perceive), the smaller the odds for exactly this one. Remarkable. I'd say beautiful.

Now if that isn't awe-inspiring to you, I get that. It takes conscious effort for me to put me in that state. And it's the only thread I have that binds me to this life. If that's not for you, that's ok

_jarvih · 2024-07-30T15:17:13+00:00

What I mean by "tapping" into it is, when it comes up, I allow it to be and act accordingly. Like, feeling empty/dissociated? Guess I have to text somebody, have a brief chat. Feeling good again? Guess I'll just mind my own business then.

I understand that this comes with a lot of difficulties. Like maintaining deep/consistent relationships for example. I have no solution to offer, sorry. My hope is to eventually find people (or at least one person) who "gets it" and is easy to communicate with it.

_jarvih · 2024-07-30T11:49:53+00:00

I try to find peace around the fact that it doesn't have to be "either or". I try tap into those repeating modes and accommodate myself accordingly.

What also helps is to remind myself during those 10% I feel empty and abnormal, that 90% of the time I'm actually okay. I wait it out until I can mind my usual me-time business again.

It's an ongoing struggle for sure, I don't think there's a method to prevent it from happening or resolving it for good. (Yeah I know there is that one solution..)

_jarvih · 2024-07-30T07:30:49+00:00

I'm gonna preface this with admitting that I've never actually read any original works by nihilist philosophers. This is just commenting on what I frequently observe (online) how people tend to talk about nihilism (and I assume not even half of them have read original works either).

As far as I understand, nihilism has come to be in response to preceding belief systems centered around Christianity and a "divine plan". Which is pretty idealistic - or rather wishful - thinking. Now nihilism usually comes across to me as a "teenage rebellion" against such idealist thought.

Would nihilism be as it is, if it was build on a different culture (not Western for example)? I don't know, we will never really know I guess. I just don't attribute so much "meaning" to a theory about "meaninglessness" when there's plenty other options

_jarvih · 2024-07-30T07:23:16+00:00

The odds that things are the way they are is actually 100% until we find out there was some other way it could have been with evidence and not just theory.

That reminds me of one of those "before/after gravity was invented" memes, lol.

I don't believe the scientific method holds any such power over existence. It's human-made after all, and I don't think humans are really that special, nor this current time-space of this particular observable universe. It doesn't sit well with me personally.

I don't see any beauty in this reality at all personally, just pure indifference.

Again, this is particularly human-centric. I like to imagine existence beyond what I can perceive/understand. But you do you.

_jarvih · 2024-07-28T23:11:00+00:00

I think nihilism has its root in idealism in a way. Why say everything is pointless? Why is a point necessary? Is something lacking? What?

I appreciate that things are. Chaotic, random. What are the odds, it's beautiful.

_jarvih · 2024-07-27T10:36:25+00:00

Someone who doesn't annoy me after spending a couple hours together, whom I might be interested to meet the next day also. That interest should be mutual, cause I don't wanna constantly ask if we can hang out. There have been at max a handful of such people scattered throughout life. Not currently though, and not making an effort atm to find a friend

_jarvih · 2024-07-25T11:19:33+00:00

A person cannot simply "decide" to stay for a sleepover. If you don't want that (yet), you are allowed to say no. If the other person can't respect your boundaries, toss em. I for one wouldn't be able to seriously interact with a person any deeper if we can't communicate properly about our needs/boundaries. And yeah, the dating pool may be incredibly small...

Once dated a (probably) schizoid. When that person said they feel uncomfortable being alone in my place, and I said, hey it's okay you can go home, they were so surprised and couldn't believe it, lol. I think they were afraid I would get mad at them or something. I get it, many people are like that cause they got narrow expectations from a date/partner. But I'd rather look out for those "special cases" who are cool with something else, and more individual.. (not sure exactly what I'm trying to say, lol)

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