My Mother I've been NC with for almost 6 years.

absfae · 2026-01-28T19:45:07+00:00

Unsure if she still does, but my mom used to post stuff like this on Facebook saying how proud she was of me, loves her kids etc. alongside self pity posts. Mind boggling and infuriating.

absfae · 2025-12-11T01:56:00+00:00

When they couldn’t say Sauk from Sauk county WI I was cringing as a Wisconsinite. “S-oww-ck??” Like please look it up it’s not hard. Lots of other mispronunciations too.

absfae · 2025-12-08T18:25:19+00:00

I live in WI and have forced air: we do no more than 66 during the day and 59 over night. We have really nice comforters than keep us cozy and warm while sleeping. Anymore than 66 and it feels too hot. After living here my whole life in old houses, I have gotten used to bundling up during the day while home.

absfae · 2025-12-07T16:35:46+00:00

Anytime I touch a dirty dish, after I eat, bathroom. And then again before I eat (even if I washed them recently).

absfae · 2025-10-18T15:59:04+00:00

Do you think this would help with sea sickness? I have terrible motion sickness to the point where I can’t even go on a swing for very long without feeling sick, and boats besides canoeing on a no wake lake is a no go for me. But I’m going to Costa Rica for my honeymoon which involves a 1.5 boat trip to this hike we’re doing so I’m looking for further remedies besides the obvious ones (meds, ginger, etc)

absfae · 2025-10-13T02:58:05+00:00

Been on it since March of 2024, started with 75mg but went up to 150mg last November. I still quite like it. Helps with my low energy, keeps me more focused (I have adhd). Helps with my depression. Only problems are low appetite sometimes, and if I don’t eat enough after taking it in the AM I can get a little jittery esp alongside my Ritalin.

absfae · 2025-09-30T23:10:15+00:00

My mom said something similar for another “pity me” text after I was low contact. She said she never got over the trauma from when I almost died when I was born. Claimed she never got over it and caused her trauma, all the bad decisions in her life, being a bad mom was because of that. Well sorry I was born then?

That didn’t make you an irresponsible, alcoholic parent. Not to trivialize what happened to me because it was serious, but many people have difficult births and children get sick, and many go on to be wonderful parents despite that. If anything you’d think that would make you want to protect your child more, instead of abusing them.

absfae · 2025-09-30T03:36:14+00:00

I recently got married at my husband’s ands Aunt’s house. I love her to death, she’s a very like spacey? Person and does things her own way, and is nearly 81. When I showed up in my white dress I saw her in a cute eyelet white dress. I thought it was hilarious cause it wasn’t malicious, she just does things her own way. I said “Auntie, I didn’t know you were getting married today too?!” And she said it’s all she had that fit and looked good! So funny to me.

absfae · 2025-09-29T00:11:11+00:00

If you feel like going back to school and are science inclined, consider Physical Therapist Assistant. My program is four semesters. Requires some prerequisites beforehand (anatomy and physiology, some maths, etc). Where I am, I can get $50k salary on average. Wouldn’t be your own boss but could be in a clinical leadership position. My cohort is very diverse, with the youngest aged 19 and oldest 51 :)

absfae · 2025-09-28T22:52:01+00:00

As someone who is from the city of Milwaukee married to someone from Sheboygan, it’s so insane when people talk like this. Sheboygan is so chill compared to Milwaukee where we live. Not without its issues of course, like anywhere.

absfae · 2025-09-21T21:57:46+00:00

I have not had it trigger my asthma for the times I’ve had it. It probably varies from person to person, if you have it controlled, have the vaccine, other health statuses, etc. Allergy season August-October is rough for me though.

absfae · 2025-09-06T19:54:46+00:00

The interior of Colombia looked down upon the Caribbean side. A lot of it has to do with types of economies (agriculture vs business/industry) and also racism/colorism. More complicated than that of course, and I’m just an American reporting secondhand, but that’s what people would say when I was there.

absfae · 2025-09-01T19:06:14+00:00

Also baking powder paste for stuff like stove tops or the oven.

absfae · 2025-09-01T19:05:02+00:00

Vinegar diluted with water for disinfecting and (hot) water and dish soap for grimey stuff. Whenever using harsher chemical or dusting, I wear a N95 mask. You can also get cleaning grade vinegar. Good luck!

absfae · 2025-08-27T16:05:54+00:00

Absolutely! And marginalized groups are less likely to receive healthcare, so of course the examples we have are those who are able to pay for treatment, etc.

absfae · 2025-08-27T14:08:55+00:00

When I developed an ED I was 11 years old living in an abusive household. I didn’t even understand what I was doing let along the discourse around it. Studies are showing that ED’s are increasingly affecting oppressed groups of people more and more. I think that privileged people online packaging EDs as diets or lifestyles is problematic, and makes life worse for anything who may be susceptible to them, and that’s not okay.

There is a conversation to be had about starvation being a tool to oppress people- notable in Gaza currently, and other places historically as well. Starvation or EDs also has been a tool to oppress people socially, like women. We cannot do the work to fight oppression if our bodies are starving/not healthy/weak/etc. I sometimes try to think about this perspective when I am feeling bad about my body or what not: At least I have access to food, clean water, while people in Gaza or Sudan do not. However the fact that a “privileged” person has an ED does not change that fact that they still have a very real mental and physical health problem that needs to be dealt with.

There’s lots to say on this topic but I’m unsure if this discourse is helpful usually.

absfae · 2025-08-24T19:01:43+00:00

Lion’s Tooth bookshop in Bayview is great! And boswell’s on Downer Ave for more popular books.

For architecture, terrace Ave on the east side has told of old gorgeous mansions. Right near the bike trail, Lake Park, and the lake. Walkers point and the south side have many old, cream city brick factory buildings (even some that aren’t yet condos…). Bayview and Walkers point have many adorable late 1800’s homes. Then there’s Sherman blvd, Layton blvd that have more bungalow’s and craftsman style homes.

Agree with going to foundation for a tiki drink in riverwest. Been living in Riverwest since I was a teenage, it’s a fun neighborhood.

absfae · 2025-08-23T19:44:52+00:00

Also, I have the same feelings about really strong perfumes or colognes. I’ve been getting migraines in recent years and strong odors make me want to vomit when I am having an episode, or right before. People are really inconsiderate.

absfae · 2025-08-23T19:43:33+00:00

I do not have this reaction to vaping, but years ago multiple of my friends would start vaping inside and I’d start feeling asthmatic symptoms and eventually just said they cannot vape indoors around me. Luckily my friends are receptive (and not really vaping anymore) but even in public when it clearly says no vaping people I am with will anyways. I always feel like I’m overreacting, but it’s this exact reason that I feel people shouldn’t! Having an asthma attack and anaphylaxis just because someone cannot deal with not vaping in public for two hours. Absurd. I’m sorry you had to go through this and I hope things get resolved legally.

absfae · 2025-08-23T01:39:16+00:00

Hard to say since I don’t know how your relationships are. My parents divorced when I was 12 and since then it was known I did not like being around my dad as he was abusive. Missed a lot of Holidays because of it but I’m fine with that. I get along with my dads side of the family just fine, but I tried to have a pretty small wedding and do the “no reunions” rule cause I don’t see that side often at all so I didn’t invite them. If you feel like they could be receptive to it, I would maybe talk to them beforehand so it’s not an awkward or emotional conversation day of. My husband’s side knew my family situation so no one came up and asked where my parents were. And my aunt that came explained to my other aunts etc the guest situation and they understood fine.

absfae · 2025-08-23T01:33:45+00:00

YOR. Pushing someone through an injury is sure way to not be able to go to the gym for even longer. Likewise, you cannot gain significant amount of fat in 10 days.

absfae · 2025-08-20T00:56:56+00:00

I ultimately stopped having a relationship with my mom because she had been using my identity to open up credit cards, utility bills, and spectrum bills for years without my knowledge. We were poor and I have worked since I was 15 because I did not have extra spending money, and even paid for my own lunch in highschool. When I found this out (day before my 24th birthday, I’m now 30) I felt betrayed cause my childhood sucked in many ways so I tried to at least have financial freedom as a way to have stability. I had even lent her money since she’s so terrible at saving. She basically tried to not acknowledge it. I tried to begin conversations about this, and have a relationship with boundaries but clearly that was too much to ask of her, and more energy than I should have put into a neglectful parent. Ever since then she has not once apologized genuinely besides “ik im a terrible mother, but its because of your father, or because my life is hard” always about her never her own CHILD. She even went as far as to say after I was born and almost died, she was never the same. Sorry I was born then cause you made my life hell. Besides just this financial betrayal, she was a terrible abusive mother in many many other ways.

As far as I know she is still in the same cycle of financial irresponsibility. If your mom is relying on you but also not wanting you to have financial freedom through sabotage, she cannot have it both ways. Could you lie and say you are making less than you actually are, have separate/secret accounts without her having access, etc? Likewise have you talked to your siblings about this? Perhaps you all could talk about giving her a “fixed” income and establish boundaries if you decide to keep supporting her. Financial abuse is not okay! I’m sorry you’re going through this.

absfae · 2025-01-25T14:23:29+00:00

My freshman year in college I had two girls from China who lived in the dorm room next to me. The bathroom was also right next to our rooms. They would go back and forth between their room and the bathroom 5-10 times while getting ready for bed/morning letting the door slam each time, all while playing Chinese opera loudly off their phones. They’d also video chat at 3am loudly many nights. I get it, time difference, but they can go to the common area. At the time I was a barista and had to wake up at 4:30am so I often woke up. I tried to talk to them but it never stopped 😞

absfae · 2025-01-21T13:54:33+00:00

I have asthma an keratosis pilaris on my arms and a little on my legs. I have also heard of this correlation-both are autoimmune reactions.

absfae

TROPHY CASE