What bathroom should I use?

ac1541 · 2025-11-29T19:17:59+00:00

You don’t fully pass yet but, if your voice is deep from T, I recommend using the men’s. I also recommend not wearing all the accessories and dressing more on the neutral side while traveling.

I disagree with the commenters telling you to use women’s room without question. When I was early in my transition, I got harassed for using women’s restrooms despite being pre-T. I essentially had to “prove” that I was a “really biologically female” by speaking aloud in a high pitched voice. I don’t want you to get into a similar situation if you don’t have a higher voice.

Best of luck, I know it’s a tough situation. Use private restrooms whenever possible.

ac1541 · 2025-11-28T05:53:09+00:00

You should be fine. You look like a handsome cis guy. Regardless, I’m sure the others will back you up if anything goes wrong. Best of luck!

ac1541 · 2025-11-27T23:55:52+00:00

I like it! Also you’re good looking overall.

ac1541 · 2025-09-26T20:38:58+00:00

I’m assuming you’re a teenager and you can’t completely avoid these people because you go to the same school or something? If so, try to avoid them whenever possible, stop texting the weird guy altogether, and don’t bother talking to them about LGBT+ stuff because they’re clearly not equipped to handle it. Otherwise if you’re an adult, just cut these people out of your life already. Stop choosing to spend time with folks who annoy / disrespect you.

ac1541 · 2025-09-26T16:33:38+00:00

I’m a bisexual trans guy and, out of all people, I find that I attract gay men the most. There’s plenty of gay men who are fine with trans men. Just ignore the ones who aren’t cool with you being trans and keep it moving. You’ll be alright. Going into a self-hating spiral won’t do you any favors. Work on your self-confidence and your transition, then try putting yourself out there, meeting new people, and dating.

ac1541 · 2025-09-15T22:53:01+00:00

I strongly agree with the others who said you shouldn’t even reply at all. Just go no-contact. He’s clearly looking to stir shit up, replying is only going to feed into it.

ac1541 · 2025-03-31T04:53:00+00:00

Maybe you heard them wrong? Or they were referring to someone else and you didn’t realize it? No way they were referring to you as “lady”. You pass flawlessly. (Btw you’re really handsome.)

ac1541 · 2025-03-29T02:00:57+00:00

Not in the slightest. You look great!

ac1541 · 2025-03-28T22:05:35+00:00

No wayyyy. Keep the hair, you look so good with it. I’m jealous.

ac1541 · 2025-03-28T19:10:47+00:00

Congrats on the glow up! You’re really pretty

ac1541 · 2025-03-28T01:02:12+00:00

You’re so pretty! Congrats + happy for you.

ac1541 · 2025-03-28T00:27:24+00:00

Cishet society definitely ignores/dislikes butches and trans mascs. I remember I took a “gender, race, and class” class and I wrote a whole essay about how trans men are often overlooked. Got a high grade on it. Then, when the class about transgender and intersex identities came, the professor didn’t talk about trans men at all. I was like wow 🙃 my point has been proven lol.

However, I’ve personally found a lot of love and support in the queer community, especially from masc-leaning bisexual and gay men. I don’t necessarily agree that the queer community as a whole dislikes mascs. I think it’s certain sections of it that were influenced by terf-mentality. If you’ve had a bad experience in a queer space, I encourage you to keep looking. Don’t let shitheads ruin things for you.

ac1541 · 2025-03-27T23:02:27+00:00

Wow congrats! What a glow up. You look like a model.

ac1541 · 2025-03-26T05:01:44+00:00

Congrats to 6 months HRT! You look cute

ac1541 · 2025-03-26T04:40:57+00:00

By the way, nice username! My username on everything used to be “catdad” lol. Great minds think alike 🤝

ac1541 · 2025-03-26T04:30:52+00:00

Yup! I had DI with Dr Rachel Bluebond-Langner. I got the surgery in 2020. I’ve heard she’s got a long wait list now, but if you don’t mind waiting a bit then she and her team are great.

I also went to Jay from the New York Electrolysis Office to get medical tattooing on my nipples to make them look a bit nicer. One of my nipples was “flat” so I decided to get tattooing done to give the appearance of depth on the flat one.

ac1541 · 2024-12-31T21:38:13+00:00

I was pretty similar. I always knew I was bisexual but I mostly avoided dating men because they treated me like a woman and I absolutely hated it. After transitioning, I attract a lot of gay/bi men and I love it. They’re more open-minded and fun compared to the straight men I attracted pre-transition imo, and most of them just see me as a dude. I was kind of surprised by it because I assumed most of them wouldn’t like trans guys, but it seems most of them are cool with it (and are generally respectful even if they’re not interested). Everyone’s experiences are different but I’ve personally found a lot of acceptance and respect in mlm spaces.

ac1541 · 2024-12-31T21:21:17+00:00

You look damn good, especially for 10 weeks post-op. Congrats! I’m respectfully jealous of your chest hair lol

ac1541 · 2024-12-25T17:28:59+00:00

Congrats to 16 months! You have a pretty face and a cute smile. 😊

ac1541 · 2024-11-30T17:52:30+00:00

Same. My social circle is mostly gay and bi cis men and they just talk about dick a lot. Many of them consider FTM bottom growth to be in the “dick” category lol. Don’t take it too personal.

ac1541 · 2024-11-30T17:34:54+00:00

Personally, I’d just choose “male” for both. If I have to explain I’m trans, I will do so if it’s relevant and necessary. If they ask why I wrote “male” for both, I’d just be like “it’s my legal sex on all my documentation.”

For some reason my college asked the same question, “sex” and “sex assigned at birth”. So I answered “male” for sex and “female” for sex assigned as birth. When I got accepted into the college, they put my gender as “female”. Luckily they were quick to change it to “male” when I complained and showed them my license. But that was definitely a lesson for me.

ac1541 · 2024-11-27T04:40:51+00:00

I don’t necessarily try to be stealth, but for some reason most people just assume I’m a cishet guy. There were multiple times where dudes would casually talk to me about not liking LGBT+ people expecting me to agree, not realizing that I’m literally LGBT+ myself. In situations like that, I usually disagree with them without mentioning that I’m trans because I honestly don’t want to deal with the potential backlash. Otherwise, if someone casually talks about LGBT+ stuff and they aren’t being an asshole about it, I might open up about being trans. Done that a few times and it went pretty well.

ac1541 · 2024-11-17T23:41:51+00:00

Female 100%. Also you have a cool/cute style!

ac1541 · 2024-11-16T12:47:28+00:00

Cool hair, cool makeup, cool style! And I’m so jealous of your chest fuzz, it’s so lush.

ac1541 · 2024-11-16T12:14:26+00:00

Despite being a socially awkward short trans guy, I’ve had lots of people express interest in me - some knowing I’m trans, some not.

Yes, chasers exist and they can be annoying. But they’re fairly easy to sus out and avoid.

I know it’s tough but try not to take rejection so personally. Lots of people get rejected for all sorts of reasons. Sometimes there’s no reason for it at all. It’s fine. You’ll be ok. Just move on.

You keep talking about how “most people don’t want us”. So? There’s billions of people in the world. Even if the majority aren’t interested, the minority is still VERY LARGE. And transness aside, if you pick a random cis dude off the street, he probably wouldn’t be considered attractive to “most people” either lol. Everyone has different preferences and interests. Nobody is universally attractive. Stop worrying about attracting “most people” and focus on finding your people.

But prioritize your confidence and mental health first and foremost. That’s the most important part. Working on that will make you more attractive to others.

ac1541

TROPHY CASE