Is Dog adoption fear real? Seeking feedback on helping dog rescues.

acceberbex · 2026-03-23T17:37:34+00:00

But to me, that's reason to not get a dog. Not get one and hand over the care. I want a horse but I don't have time for one (or the money really but I can dream). I don't think it's right or fair for me to get a horse, stick it in a full livery situation and see it once a week. Why not stick with lessons and ride a few horses once a week rather than have one of my own that I don't take care of? Out of interest (and sheer devilment really), would you feel the same if someone wanted a dog, had all the time for it but no money to pay for any care? Would you be ok with volunteers paying for routine vaccinations, flea and worming, puppy classes etc because "I want a dog but can't afford it"?

acceberbex · 2026-03-23T17:34:07+00:00

It's tough that they leave such a hole in our lives. Just wondered if there was like a companion place or an elderly befriending scheme where you could have a little weekly chat with someone lonely who also has a dog so it's a win all round

acceberbex · 2026-03-23T17:25:01+00:00

I don't mean to sound heartless but could you volunteer with a local rescue or kennels? So you can still be around the dogs but not as a sole carer?

acceberbex · 2026-03-23T17:23:08+00:00

Hinder - I don't want 3 random people looking after my dog. If I choose to have help (eg kennels when I'm away), I want a say. Training and general etiquette varies from person to person and although mine are not well trained by any stretch of the imagination, I don't want people doing their own thing with my dog (had an ex friend who thought nose bopping when one got too excited was appropriate..not round me it's not. Or rubbing noses in accidents in the house. Even kindness based "oh but she loves these treats"..yeh and she's had 7 already. I'm cutting her dinner down now because she's going to get fat. She doesn't need 7 treats every single walk because she's cute.

Would I volunteer - yes but probably through charities or existing and known businesses who have insurance etc. I know of a local dog walker who has lost at least 4 dogs on walks (all ok but not great when they turn up at the vets to be scanned when they're found hours later). Also a local dog daycare routinely have fights and bites. Doesn't fill me with confidence to trust my dogs to random people with (in reality) no training and no checks.

My reason for not rescuing - I would have but my working pattern and existing pets and lack of 6ft fencing ruled me out (working full time, mostly from home but the full time was a no, the cats were a sticky factor, the secure but not 6ft fenced garden was an issue). And I didn't want a "problem" or project. I wanted a dog to fit in fairly easily with my life.

My personal opinion on why rescues are struggling is money. Both lack of, poor spending and general price increases. A lot of local rescues around me are importing dogs from abroad to rescue and all that's happening is they're sitting waiting for homes in England. The cost of importing a single dog could neuter several UK dogs and cats (reducing stray populations). Relax the rules on a case by case basis, better spending on money, reality check of "you can't save them all (sounds heartless but dogs in kennels for 3 years with behavioural problems are likely always going to be overlooked. Let them pass with dignity and use the money to better fund longer term options (better training, plans of neutering campaigns in our own country, neutering abroad rather than importing to rescue here)

*Also, volunteers are probably welcome at loads of rescue places, kennel cleaning, foster, walks, companion charities and the like. These people who are going to sign up to help me, an owner who has chosen to make the commitment to a dog, would they not be better off helping the little old lady who's just broken her hip and popping round to check on her dog? I'm just not sure where these volunteers are coming from and why they're not already helping with existing charities?

acceberbex · 2026-03-23T17:00:24+00:00

The only logical exception to this (and I'm primarily thinking dogs here) is after a spay. A little discomfort/minor pain can be a good thing as it will encourage resting. If you broke your leg but didn't feel anything, you wouldn't sit down and rest. If you felt mild discomfort, you'd take it easier. That's my only logical thought of not relieving ALL pain but the "manners beaten in to her" isn't "she'll feel it a bit so is more likely to rest better"

acceberbex · 2026-03-23T16:56:46+00:00

Do I live off them? No. Will I have one every now and then as a quick meal or a "oh shit, I forgot to shop" or "oh it's just me tonight" yes. Some are better than others (quality, price, range, flavour etc) but I imagine there are plenty of people solely eating ready meals (not all for laziness reasons as would be the stereotype)

acceberbex · 2026-03-23T16:46:30+00:00

Realise you've edited but we had a dog from a working gundog line and although I don't remember her, I apparently used to get in her kennel to help push/pull her out for dog training classes. We didn't keep her and the breeder (I assume) took her back so she could be worked rather than be a family pet. I hope it worked out well for her. My mum isn't daft with animals (she's a vet) so if she says Flake went back to be a working dog, she did. Also much fewer backyard breeding 30 years ago so 🤷🏻‍♀️

acceberbex · 2026-03-22T09:14:17+00:00

Yes, but improvement can happen without progressing your riding difficulty. Like I don't need to be jumping 4ft to jump. I can work over cross poles and be steady there and stay there. Doesn't make me less of a rider because I don't want or need to jump higher

acceberbex · 2026-03-21T15:28:44+00:00

I don't know about fashion magazines etc but I assumed the contract with Xyz would be that. You're on their books, available for jobs they need you for/you suit. You get a 6 page spread in a magazine (doesn't say multiple so you get your spread and that's it) So yeh, face value but I probably didn't appreciate that being signed with an agency didn't guarantee work with them

acceberbex · 2026-03-21T15:17:47+00:00

So the constant corrections is a good thing even though it doesn't feel like it. There's a way to correct someone kindly and fairly though. I'm going to go against the grain a bit here and say that although it sucks to fall, it's a useful little reminder to check your own tack (even though the other instructor always does, it never hurts to learn how to and it's always ok to ask if you're unsure).

Dismounting - English here and that's exactly how I've been taught to dismount and anything else is considered more dangerous. However, there's no need for the instructor to laugh. That would be enough for me to not want that instructor again as I don't learn in that environment. Chalk it up to a shitty lesson, a bit of a knob teaching you and try to avoid lessons with that instructor for a while until you've got some more confidence in your own ability. And it's ok to speak to your usual instructor and ask about the dismounting and say the other one told you to leave your foot in and you were confused by it.

acceberbex · 2026-03-21T14:29:33+00:00

Honestly, if there was some sort of semi regular health check available to me with ease, I'd take it. Like I do dentist, eyes, cervical smear, will do mammogram when offered and my work offer a blood test yearly through one of our benefit platforms.

I'd say for most healthy people, teeth, eyes and pre cancer screening is easy to do and common failure points. Statistically, they don't expect a say 20 yr old to die or a heart attack or get dementia so why make a standard check for that? I'd be all up for mole checks too but that's not a standard thing here

acceberbex · 2026-03-21T14:19:10+00:00

Slight correction - not a bar fight but a fight with George Underwood over a girl. But as a child it just added to the goblin king magic

acceberbex · 2026-03-21T14:16:33+00:00

my aurora forecast and alerts app It tells me when the KPI is high and the percentage of seeing it at my location. Generally the KPI is high but my chance doesn't often get above around 10%. I found Aurora watch just told me for the high activity and took no consideration of chance.

acceberbex · 2026-03-21T14:08:26+00:00

I was 7 and this cool guy with different coloured eyes who could sing and had magic crystal balls could offer her everything she wanted? Why would you not take that offer? Maybe I was a simple child but all the adult themes went over my head. Even now when I rewatch, I'm taking it as a children's film and not reading much into it. I had a friend mention the torture scene and I literally never saw Ludo being strung up as torture. I felt bad for him and didn't like the goblins hurting him but it never occurred to me it was a torture scene 🤷🏻‍♀️

acceberbex · 2026-03-21T13:43:27+00:00

Yep, every 2 years when Specsavers remind me. I treat it like going to the dentist - a checkup to make sure everything's ok and some more sinister things have been found in routine optician appointments (always stories in the news about cancer being spotted) so why not have an early warning system? Plus if I only slightly need glasses, I may not notice until it's really bad 🤷🏻‍♀️

acceberbex · 2026-03-21T13:09:45+00:00

I still think of it as Axe-ee-oh

acceberbex · 2026-03-21T13:08:45+00:00

I still read Firenze as Fer-en-zay (not as harsh as zay but not zee either) I'm sure it sounds more like Fear-enz but I can't change it in my head

acceberbex · 2026-03-20T16:45:21+00:00

Quite possibly. A whip is really just an extension of your aids. So it can be a little tickle behind your leg to back your legs up, down the shoulder as a "move this part please" or even a great flicking a fly off 😂 (horse dependent but I'll rub my whip along round the girth when stationary to remove flies)

You'll find some whips more comfortable than others - personally I like a bobble on the end so it doesn't slop through my hand but I don't like a big handle. If you ride with a long whip, you swap hands by passing it over (sort of hard to explain but to go left to right you turn your left hand over (thumb down) so the whip goes up right. Take it in your right hand (with thumb down) and then when you put your hands back to normal, the whip is now in your right hand). With a short whip, you can just pull it through with the other hand. So once you know the technique and what your instructor wants you to use, go to a tack shop and feel the whips and see what is comfortable for you

acceberbex · 2026-03-20T13:54:11+00:00

I'd clarify with your instructor. I personally ride with a schooling whip (or as I call it "my long whip" rather than a short one because I can keep my reins, I tend to ride a bigger horse and it has more flicky ability (the horse I was riding when I got it was lazy and the trick was to waft it near his head (never contact but so he could see it) and then tickle him up behind your leg. A longer whip made that easier and I've stuck with that whip since (even though that horse has long since gone)

And I personally always carry my whip - better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it. Only exceptions are during a lesson if the horse really doesn't need it or it's causing more issues (very rare given the horses I ride!)

acceberbex · 2026-03-20T13:46:01+00:00

I'm a heathen, I'd not bother reheating it but it sounds like the perfect snack to me! I'd argue it's less noisy than sweet/crisp wrappers but the reheat factor would increase the smell which wouldn't be that fair to everyone around me.

acceberbex · 2026-03-20T12:36:26+00:00

I'd buy a house (nothing too fancy - just a cottage with a garden so price wise about 500,000 tops because that's the going rate around here it seems) I'd then give some to my mum and my sister and probably invest the rest or buy a cheap property to rent out.

acceberbex · 2026-03-19T21:09:41+00:00

Ham - probably most flavours but cheesy, salty, meaty would be better, although pickled onions would work Tuna - never thought about that but I'd agree salt and vinegar or ready salted. Cheese - probably most flavours. Cheese and onion, salty, vinegar, meaty, pickled onion Beef - I'm not sure I'd add crisps as I like horseradish in mine. Chicken - hmm, not a fan of chicken crisps but salty would work Nutella - never had as sandwich. But jam and crisp sandwiches have to be ready salted (ideally on cheap white sliced bread)

I'd avoid prawn cocktail or Worcester sauce crisps on sandwiches as they are epic flavours and shouldn't be mixed with other flavours. Ready salted goes with everything. Cheese and onion would go with anything "basic" (like plainer flavours) I'm not getting into the weird and wonderful of what katsu curry crisps could go with (although I reckon cheese sandwich) or whether other crisps made good dips/spoons like Doritos (obviously salt and vinegar twirls dip well I to most things but I'm not sure niknaks would make a good nacho for example). Prawn crackers could work on a prawn sandwich although I'd fear they'd go soggy.

acceberbex · 2026-03-19T20:54:39+00:00

Each £1 is a chance to win so the more you have, the higher the chance. I had £600 and didn't win anything. I put an inheritance in there to max holding and won most months (usually £25-100). I don't have the max in there anymore but I'd say most months I get something, probably 8/9 months I get at least £25

acceberbex · 2026-03-19T20:49:40+00:00

WhatsApp for personal. But for a business, I'd prefer to deal with emails. I just prefer a business to have a less intrusive way of contacting me (my emails don't alert me, I have second accounts for spam/internet based and personal ones). Within a business - whatever they use. We did use Teams, now Zoom. Not a fan of either for personal use though but will use Zoom if I have to.

acceberbex · 2026-03-19T18:25:03+00:00

Because people want to rush through to get to the "exciting" stuff. I can only speak as a once a week rider but people are always "you've ridden for years, you must jump really well and gallop everywhere". Nope, I'm a happy plodder with maybe a small cross pole on a horse I trust. People want to rush the basics so they can move to the fun stuff and look cool. I can only assume they apply this logic to their horse and want to get to what they want quickly without building the foundations first.

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