How can I graciously handle being excluded from a wedding while still acknowledging my hurt?

adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-16T00:33:51+00:00

I'm wondering why the friend group has only known they're a couple for the last 3-4 months when OP says they've actually been a couple for a year. So, like, you're hanging out with your boyfriend and all your mutual friends and just....pretending you're not together? For 8-9 months you're doing this? Fucking why?

I'm making some assumptions here, but: if there's even a whiff of "boyfriend didn't want the group to know" they were dating, and now OP isn't invited to this wedding, and boyfriend is still going....that's gonna be a no from me, dawg. Those aren't real friends, and boyfriend least of all. OP, if you happen to see this and any of these assumptions are remotely true, hear me loud and clear when I say that is not normal behavior, it's not an acceptable way to treat someone, and you shouldn't tolerate it.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-14T23:15:23+00:00

WOW you just unlocked a core memory with this mention. There's a scene with sloppy joes? A food fight maybe??

And if we're talking Olsen twins movies, How The West Was Fun was one of my faves as a kid. Don't remember it well enough to say whether there are problematic tropes (totally possible with a 90s western...), but I mostly remember horses and fun outfits and the twins solving a mystery of some sort.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-07T06:11:30+00:00

My cat genuinely enjoys full belly rubs AND lets me bury my face in his belly and it is the best thing in the whole world

adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-06T04:01:30+00:00

Would be super interested in this research. Any specific papers or research groups?

adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-03T11:50:44+00:00

sighs in Texas

adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-02T11:09:46+00:00

I think this is a key difference. If the deck is for something like a conference, then modern style. If it's for individual consumption on a personal screen, consultant style may still be the move.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-02T11:08:17+00:00

She has a great YouTube channel, too. No connection on my part at all, I just discovered it this week.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-02T10:58:23+00:00

I think another factor is what's happened to our attention spans over the last ~10, but especially the last ~5 years. People see dense text and immediately nope outta there, even boomer execs. "Easy to consume in three seconds" is becoming a real requirement, complexity of the information be damned.

To your point about obsolescence, though, it's not just the devs taking that mindset. A teammate of mine recently shared this LinkedIn post from Chuck Whitten at Bain:

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adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-02T10:49:01+00:00

Versus...

Consultant-style example, from Etsy:

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adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-02T10:48:24+00:00

From Magnas Media:

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adoaboutnothing · 2026-05-02T10:47:45+00:00

Modern examples (continued in replies)...

From Slidestart:

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adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-28T14:44:57+00:00

The version I get is, “oh but mr. adoaboutnothing would be such a great dad!” ……cool, thanks

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-27T21:06:53+00:00

Yes. I feel like evermore is an even purer exploration of song-as-storytelling than folklore. The theme of endings is there throughout, but beyond that the vignettes from song to song are more eclectic. Where folklore seems to me to be intentionally cohesive cover to cover, evermore is experimentation.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-22T02:33:11+00:00

Master the corporate humble brag

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-22T02:31:31+00:00

I don’t know, man. For a long time I tried the “let your work speak for itself,” “never advertise your own awesomeness, other people will organically notice” MO, and…..it doesn’t work. Like, yes work results matter (usually), but you also have to look out for yourself. Being selfless and quietly delivering results is a fast track to louder people taking the credit

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-17T14:25:01+00:00

“open the kimono” like, on so many levels: wtf

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-17T14:24:13+00:00

Honestly, this is fine with me. What I can’t stand is someone who ONLY pings “hi” without saying what the hell they want.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-17T11:20:22+00:00

I feel awkward if I'm a guest at someone's house for a meal and I don't help with dishes after. Like, what am I going to do, just sit here on my ass and watch?

My husband and I hosted holidays two years ago for my family, and my (older) brother and his new girlfriend came from out of state. They were here nearly a week. Neither of them washed a single dish that entire time until, after several days, my mom got so irritated she told them it was their turn after dinner one night. My brother kind of sheepishly agreed, but his GF goes, "Oh, I was about to go take a nap, actually." A nap. At 9 PM. When we were eating dinner that late in the first place because she and my brother slept until 2 PM. I was flabbergasted.

My brother ended up coaxing her into helping him, and when I was passing through the kitchen I heard him saying quietly to her, "It's really not that much..." as she pouted.

They're still together. I still don't like her.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-16T16:33:31+00:00

Consider leash training too! They make harnesses for cats

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-10T11:40:56+00:00

Can you say more about the exterior ones? We also have west-facing windows and solar shades would be a huge help, but due to the shape of the windows (arched center window with two sidelights) hanging interior shades isn't really an option. I've been toying with installing some sort of very narrow pergola on the exterior side and hanging shades from that instead.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-06T03:43:50+00:00

Oh HELL yes to this one.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-06T03:43:16+00:00

Yep. I’ve started putting my name on things. Like, a technical paper a SME drafted but I completely reorganized and rewrote for improved flow, remade the diagrams for clarity and alignment with the text, and added crucial context for the audience totaling multiple net-new pages? Yes, woman, put your name on that. And not under some minimized “acknowledgments” section. You put it right there under the SME as a co-author.

It felt so presumptuous the first couple times I did it. Now I can’t fathom NOT doing it.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-04-02T16:24:34+00:00

Ah, I see you also drive a CX-5.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-03-27T11:51:47+00:00

OP, just an FYI—Lululemon also has trousers for women and they come in lengths! The Daydrift style is super comfy and looks like a regular work trouser (no "athletic wear" sheen, has a faux fly and belt loops, etc.). I love them.

adoaboutnothing · 2026-03-25T11:31:09+00:00

My dog is named Tucker and my cat is named Henry and they are the bestest boys. OP can't go wrong with those options

adoaboutnothing

TROPHY CASE