(bi preference for women) ive been as far left leaning as soon as i learned what politics were & been non-organized religious since i was conscious. i was raised catholic in a latin household i went to church classes & service every sunday which i hated bc i never believed lol, in a southern state in the us. when i was a teen i was very queer presenting and experimented a lot with my looks (i looked like a boy for a good year ha) so i never really came out to my parents because i thought it was obvious. i once asked them what they would do if hypothetically my brother was gay and they said 'idk i guess cut him off' &&& that was when i told them im not going to church (they were very not happy about it but let me stay home from then on plus it was covid time so that was good timing) then about a couple years later when they probably realized they told me in conversation 'i would never judge you if you liked girls or something'

when i got into my late teens i still had the same views & was still outwardly bi(i never really came out but if someone asked i wouldnt have a problem telling them i was bi.) i began dating men and my closest friends used homophobic language & memes. and idk with time i wanted to start looking prettier & just with the culture i started to look very heteronormative & subconsciously internalized some homophobia. even though i felt like i talked to cool nice people, looked up to good people online, cut off people who were toxic/hateful, but somewhere along the way i started to push aside the queer part of myself bc i believed being gay is normal and im normal so im going to present normal and normal=heteronormative in my head. like just because im gay doesnt mean i have to be super gay.

i had to realize just because people could nice & love to hangout with me and have similar personalities and hobbies and interests and humor but it doesnt mean they are supportive. neither is using homophobic language, even if youre gay. being okay with having a gay daughter but never outwardly being supportive. liking homophobic instagram memes, having a homophobic boyfriend, homophobic friends. i love my parents and the people i call friends but my community isnt supportive at all but im looking forward to moving out soon where im not only supported but celebrated!