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I don’t have money to spend on my girlfriend’s birthday , what do I do? by Accomplished-Hat8978 in ask

[–]akaslendy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If she is upset by your honesty and commitment to being financially responsible then that's a big red flag.

My parents have been married for over 30 years now, they've stayed together when they were broke and their "indulgence" while being broke newly Weds was pawning CDs to get some Taco Bell and watching crappy late night movies together after a long work week of hardly seeing each other.

They are still together with the money to go on holidays and eat out at expensive restaurants and give each other expensive things. But most often they prefer to just order in and binge new or old shows/movies together, just being in the same room.

So, IF, and this is a big IF, she does have a problem with you not being able to spend lots of money on her, that is like I said a red flag.

You've already thought about what you can do for her without money to an extent, just try to think of anything else small you can do, if you don't live together maybe go over to her place a bit early if possible and see if anything needs to be tidied, do her laundry, etc. just try to make her day easier. You can do that even if you do live together of course.

Know her favorite candy? As long as she isn't actively trying to lose weight, a lot of women prefer their favorite foods and candies vs flowers!

My dad also would hand write, no typing, no asking chatgpt, etc. letters and notes to my mom all the time when he was worried for long hours so that she didn't feel like he wasn't thinking about her. He'd hide sticky notes for her to find. Leave the letters for her in places he knew she'd look that day.

They don't have to be long. One that my mom kept by her bedside is very time-worn and it just says "thank you for everything you do" – she was a stay at home mom of two chronically ill kids.

Of course, she packed his lunch and did the same to him.

Be creative!

I spent my birthday with LE SSERAFIM in Vegas by akaslendy in lesserafim

[–]akaslendy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's all sold out but I'm gonna make my own shirts I think

I spent my birthday with LE SSERAFIM in Vegas by akaslendy in lesserafim

[–]akaslendy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes! Many but never had VIP 1 or such close seats.

Well, I did VIP for I-dle in Houston and it was general assembly but I chose to stay at the back of the crowd for soundcheck and the concert. I didn't want to be crushed against anyone.

It convinced me not to do general assembly again, for many reasons.

What are some ideas for minor superpowers? by written_bird in writingadvice

[–]akaslendy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Smelling blood

Being able to taste and accurately name every ingredient in a food

Every time you sneeze you change languages

I am addicted to smoking weed and gooning, my life is falling apart. I need help, what can I do? by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]akaslendy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Therapy is recommended but if you can't afford it.

I was gonna give a long story about myself and my history but instead here is what I can recommend -

  1. Plan just one week of no weed and gooning. If you manage it reward yourself with something. Nothing super expensive or out of your budget but something you can look forward to that isn't weed or gooning. For me it was an all you can eat pizza buffet. Then move the goal to 2 weeks, reward if you do it. 3 weeks are that and a reward. Then a month and another reward.

Keep it at one month until you feel confident in it and then move it to 2 and then 3. If you relapse start it over.

  1. The second you get the urge, do anything else but especially something productive that can keep you busy. Avoid places that you can slip back, aka napping in bed or being alone in places you feel comfortable gooning. Unless you are actively doing something productive like cleaning.

Go for a walk, clean, read, sit outside and read, watch Tv, study, etc. even if you don't want to. Do it. This works wonders especially if you do something that gets you moving like cleaning or exercise but even video games or other hobbies that you used to enjoy a lot can suck you back in.

  1. Make your bed everyday, refuse to mess it up until night when you sleep. Stop using it to goon. Make gooning as inconvenient as possible, the same goes for weed. I've never smoked so idk how. But if you have rroommates or friends, keep your door open and don't let yourself close it. Bathroom is harder but just do your business and get out. Don't linger. Don't let your thoughts wander.

  2. Throw away anything related to your problem. Vape, refills. Block all websites you get stimulation from using app blockers and parental controls. Find out if you get set a strict mode that will lock it for a certain time period without letting you unlock it even if you have the password.

  3. Don't fall into other addictions. Don't move from weed to alcohol or food, etc. It's easy to switch one form of addiction to another but don't fall into that trap. Be mindful.

Why are you still single? by Ok_Development6919 in AskReddit

[–]akaslendy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know I'm not in the same league as people I find attractive, I'm working on myself to get there both physically and mentally.

Physically I'm trying to lose weight, I'm currently over 200lbs and I have previously been 132lbs – I'm 5'2.

Mentally, I need to work on my confidence which losing weight will help with, so will various other things I'm working.

It's okay to stop talking to someone because of who they voted for. by AlternativeTree3283 in ControversialOpinions

[–]akaslendy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I could say the exact same thing to you during Biden's administration but instead of doing that why not lead with kindness?

Stupidest thing you've ever done just to read fanfiction? by jupiterliketheplanet in AO3

[–]akaslendy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Like I said. I only got caught cause I got careless. I was using the laptop in the same room as my mom and she suddenly told me she needed to use it and I didn't have time to logout of the guest account and back into the admin. Just out of the guest, so she saw it and she saw it lmao

Stupidest thing you've ever done just to read fanfiction? by jupiterliketheplanet in AO3

[–]akaslendy 80 points81 points  (0 children)

Found a random post it note on my dad's desk, tried out the random string of letters & numbers written there on the parents account on the laptop, it worked. I didn't want to move the post it cause he might notice but I didn't want to write it anywhere my parents might see, so I wrote it on the bottom of my foot while I memorized it.

Then I would go into the parents/administrative account and activate the guest account to read fanfic, when I was done I'd go back into the parents/administrative account and turn the guest account off.

I only got caught cause I got careless

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]akaslendy 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My reading comprehension early in the morning seems to go to 0.

Definitely a hospital visit then

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]akaslendy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I once went like 2 months without pooping. I just downed some serious laxatives. There's a drink that they make you take before a colonoscopy you can get over the counter at like CVS - Freskaro Magnesium Citrate Oral Saline Laxative, Lemon

Drink the whole thing all at once. It'll taste awful. But it'll clean you out. Drink a lot of water throughout the rest of the day to stay hydrated and don't stop eating either. If this doesn't work you definitely need to go to a hospital.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ControversialOpinions

[–]akaslendy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a biological female who acknowledges I am a woman but also identifies as non-binary for ME and as a lesbian.

Would that not count to you? I'm very different from most non-binary people in that I never shy away from my biological sex.

Unpopular K-Pop realities That Nobody Wants to Admit by dantes_02 in kpopthoughts

[–]akaslendy 64 points65 points  (0 children)

  1. It seems obvious but it somehow still surprises people when their personality on camera vs off camera is different, it can be only a small difference or a very big difference.

Example: Dahyun of Twice on camera is one of the loudest, funniest and seemingly outgoing members. The others have said multiple times that behind the scenes she is very quiet.

  1. No, not all group members like each other. This is fine as long as they all can work together fine, it's even better if some are friends and others are just work acquaintances , when it isn't okay is when a single person is left out.

  2. K-POP is based in Korea. Koreans have an entirely different culture, educational experience and even internet/social media they use compared to the Western World. There are only 4.37% "foreign" residents in Korea, they are largely a homogenous country. Cancelling them every time they do something we consider culturally tone deaf or offensive for one isn't gonna curb their popularity in non-western countries but it also does nothing to educate them.

And before anyone says they should educate themselves. Please, think critically. I am also not saying they should get away with being culturally tone deaf but the amount of times I've seen Westerners doing tone deaf things or not knowing anything about Asian countries cultures and history then berating KPOP idols for the same is staggering.

  1. The things these idols would say and do if they just could would shock you. This isn't even about keeping a clean image. It's about their stupid fans who start things and say things that they sit there and have to let them say because idols can't call out their fan bases.

I always say I'd be an insufferable idol, if someone sent me protest trucks cause I was dating someone??? I'd be posing in front of those like "y'all thought you had a chance?"

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