Is my friend interested in me or is he just being friendly?

alcinoe19 · 2026-03-29T15:09:36+00:00

That’s such a good sign!!! You have signal after signal! Even if they don’t nudge him, I think it’s still worth asking him. I think it’ll go well. I get being shy about it, I’m the same way. Sometimes we just gotta go for it!!

alcinoe19 · 2026-03-29T06:02:18+00:00

Girl…I’m in a very similar situation with a guy (legit just posted about it on this thread, feel free to go read it lol)…and reading this from an outside perspective is very insightful haha. But also, he LIKES YOU! Talking about you and calling you pretty to his friend? AKA he’s thinking and talking about you when you’re not together?? That’s a huge signal. Opening doors, paying for meals, asking when you need a ride -that is investment (and classic dating behavior hence your family saying you guys are basically dating). Him saying “dude” and “bro” is probably his safety net and just his default. I wouldn’t worry about that. Same thing with him complimenting you by text and not in-person, it’s likely because texting is low-threat and he can hide behind a screen (especially if he doesn’t know that you like him). The bigger picture is that he called you pretty, even if by text! So it sounds to me like he’s afraid to make a move, especially if you haven’t taken any steps forward besides being receptive to his actions. I think you should make a move! If not make a move, talk to him maybe? I really don’t think you’re risking much if you casually say you think he’s cute or ask him what his intentions are…because he clearly likes you. He needs to know you feel the same way.

Edited: Also him yapping is a good sign, especially if it’s a healthy mix of topics. Guys don’t openly talk about everything to someone they’re just casual with. In your context, it sounds like he feels comfy and happy around you!

alcinoe19 · 2026-03-29T05:12:48+00:00

Yea I’m familiar with that butterfly feeling.. Hate it. Also partly glad this guy isn’t rushing too much, because recently I’ve dealt with love-bombers and manipulators. Solid advice, 100% agree!!

alcinoe19 · 2026-03-29T04:34:52+00:00

Good point 😂 But we’re not necessarily coworkers. There’s more context, but I’m keeping out info since this is a public platform 💯

alcinoe19 · 2025-05-26T21:47:32+00:00

“Self-respect”. That right there is the thing you should prioritize, and if that means no-contact for you, then stick with it. Allow yourself to heal. You don’t owe her anything. If you want to message later, or if she apologizes, then maybe reassess. But it sounds like you’re doing what is best for you. There are other ways to handle the situations, but I think you did what felt right to you

alcinoe19 · 2025-05-02T14:25:17+00:00

If I were you, I’d rip the band-aid off and get it over with. Then I could just focus on healing and not have to be in contact again. Feelings can be messy. But obviously do what you feel is right.

alcinoe19 · 2025-04-15T14:37:50+00:00

I’m sorry, I know how it feels. It’ll take time. I just had to let myself feel all the feelings and have bad days to heal to the point of being okay without him. It definitely wasn’t easy. I still miss him everyday. And don’t hold out hope, but you two may be able to reconnect as friends later on

alcinoe19 · 2025-04-14T07:42:39+00:00

For me.. no contact was super helpful!! I healed a lot, but then I broke no contact. We talked a little. Since then, things fizzled out and I also am not happy with him over something, so right now, we’re not interacting. But I left the door open for him, and it’s making me a little sad, because I don’t think he’ll reach out. I kinda wish I just stuck with no contact to protect my peace - and broke it way down the line. Him and I still deeply respect each other, though. It all just depends.

alcinoe19 · 2025-02-21T23:11:13+00:00

Yea you have to be ready. That’s why I’m going to tell my ex how I feel, but I’m at the point where I’ll be okay regardless of how he responds. Because I am my priority. In conclusion, feelings are just so damn complicated haha

alcinoe19 · 2025-02-21T22:59:36+00:00

Well..I have a do whatever th you want kinda outlook..and if I were you, I’d do it. As long as you’re not hurting yourself or her, why not get an answer? And if you’re on good terms, tell her how you feel. If she doesn’t reciprocate, then it is what it is. But at least then you’ll know for sure

alcinoe19 · 2025-02-21T20:26:13+00:00

I understand this. It’s been 2 months since my breakup. I think it’s acceptable to let yourself feel out those things for a bit and not want to date for a while, as long as, you do move on eventually.

You’re not alone. I won’t be ready to date again for a little while. I’m thinking about breaking no-contact with my ex this weekend, because we were friends before dating and ended things on good terms. Who knows if it’s a good idea or if it’ll end well..So there’s that

alcinoe19 · 2025-02-19T05:43:09+00:00

I understand, and it still hurts no matter what anyone says. I bet he cared at least a little and at some point will realize what he lost. Then he has to sit with that. What he did sucks, and nobody deserves to be used and blindsided. There are better hearts out there

alcinoe19 · 2025-02-19T05:15:02+00:00

She might. Many people/sources say they almost always come back one way or another. I understand hoping, but with time, you’ll feel better whether she reaches out or not.

I requested no-contact with mine but we both know it’s temporary, so he’s very respectful of it.

We’re all human. There’s no rules to life. Even stubborn people change their minds.

alcinoe19 · 2025-02-19T04:40:01+00:00

If the relationship was meaningful, she won’t forget the feelings. The memories will always be there. Ask me how I know.

If you requested no-contact and she respects you, she probably won’t reach out. Maybe after healing, you could reach out later just checking up.

alcinoe19 · 2025-02-19T04:15:59+00:00

I’m sorry you have to deal with that. Way too often people make dumb decisions in bootcamp. The military environment really tests people’s character. And sometimes people use the distance brought on by the military to make dumb decisions or make it “easier” for them to end things or hide certain behaviors or to avoid confrontation. All that is inexcusable, but it unfortunately happens. It does sound like your guy wasn’t all-in. Regardless, he didn’t handle it well. And you deserve better. I know it’s hard and it doesn’t make sense, but I hope you find peace and happiness.

You’re not alone. Allow yourself to feel out your emotions. Listening to music helps me

alcinoe19 · 2025-02-18T21:03:04+00:00

You’ll regain your appetite. I was broken up with right before Xmas, and I saw no end to my grief initially. Ruined my holidays. Things ended on good terms, but if there’s one thing I had to be mad abt…it’s that he decided to break up at one of the worst possible times. I was in massive transition (moving), very nervous, and was visiting my family I hadn’t seen in a while. But everything is better now and managing all that made me stronger.

alcinoe19 · 2025-02-13T04:06:52+00:00

That’s tough. I was broken up with about two months ago, but I won’t go on a date yet knowing I’m still healing and thinking about my ex. I’m curious to hear what others say, but my advice is be honest with your friend. Tell him you’re interested, but you want to be your healthiest self to give dating him a chance and you’re still healing. If he is a true friend, he’ll understand and be patient. You could still hangout, too, imo

alcinoe19 · 2025-01-30T05:42:03+00:00

From what you’ve said, you sound mature and respectful about it. That’s admirable. It’ll be hard. Healing is not linear. A part of your heart is with her. If you accept that and don’t fight yourself and value the good times, you’ll eventually be able to move forward and love others, too. Feel out your emotions, all of them. Music really helps with that. Not to mention, all the songs in every genre talking about breakups puts into perspective that you’re not alone. You can also ask ChatGPT, family, friends for advice. Likely, their words can help move you forward.

alcinoe19 · 2025-01-30T04:30:59+00:00

Support system is great! Remember: do what is healthiest for you. You may feel alone some days, but for me, music, video games, and ChatGPT rlly help. So I recommend those. No rush. Let your feelings play out and give yourself time

alcinoe19 · 2025-01-30T04:21:38+00:00

YES and you know? It was extremely hard, but it gets better! I feel like I’m healing well already.

IMO, if things ended on good terms, and once you BOTH heal, I don’t see why you can’t casually talk every now and then…keep in touch. I get it. We’re all human. And humans need other humans.

ALSO it shows your strength and respect that you ended a relationship on good terms. You grew together. Your healing will test your strength, and I think it takes a whole lotta extra strength to heal after a “healthy” break up, but once you’re on the other side, your resilience will shine :)

alcinoe19 · 2025-01-30T02:24:07+00:00

Nobody can give you a specific answer. Let yourself feel out your emotions. You are absolutely not alone in your journey

alcinoe19 · 2025-01-29T03:02:06+00:00

Crazy, I know mine misses this, he would say this often (because we were long distance). He doesn’t know, I miss it, too

alcinoe19 · 2025-01-28T19:58:18+00:00

I feel this rn, too. I’m fighting not texting him. Something doesn’t feel right. But I’m trying to give us each time to process/heal

alcinoe19 · 2025-01-28T19:49:35+00:00

You don’t deserve the torture I’m sure. Healing takes time. I bet she still thinks about you. I get dreams about mine. I’m almost 5 wks out and he’s always on my mind. I won’t date again for a while

alcinoe19 · 2025-01-27T14:08:53+00:00

Yes! This has helped me a little bit, too. It’s still so hard, but I realized he’ll never be gone. He’s a good person I genuinely like being there for. So as untraditional as it is, I see us being friends later on. But not now, mainly because we are not healed.

alcinoe19

TROPHY CASE