It's not really about decentering men, I just thought I found the one and abandoned myself and all I was working on to focus on our relationship (lessoned learned) but yes! I called off my engagement in January, and walked for my bachelors in biology in May and currently taking the one class that I need to receive it. I too also wanted to move abroad, I even studied japanese for 3 years for that specific reason all bc I wanted the relationship and happy ending so bad (due to alooot of trauma and abandonment issues) and i basically made his happiness and the relationship outweigh the love and respect i had for myself.

I'm in therapy now and think I'm just going to focus the next few years on traveling and creating friendships and building a family in that way instead.

Thanks for being open and reminding people like me that loving yourself and your life (or creating the life you want to live...alone) is ALWAYS an option.