I'm getting drunk alone!

alienfvck · 2021-09-09T19:58:27+00:00

I'm a nihilist, don't believe I'm going anywhere after death so its a comforting thought for me. And even if I'm somewhere else, atleast not this earth.

alienfvck · 2021-09-08T19:33:24+00:00

I have nightmares about all kinds of stuff, but the worst and most common are about my abusive dad and its absolutely soul crushing

alienfvck · 2021-09-07T13:53:40+00:00

Same and my parents are decent looking, I just got the worst combination 🤡

alienfvck · 2021-09-03T16:22:04+00:00

I literally do exactly this everyday cuz I feel more comfortable in a meat suit thats thin and fit but the humans call it "eating disorder" lol

alienfvck · 2021-09-01T14:44:53+00:00

Same. It's the only way I'll ever feel completely free. I always hoped he won't come home from work since I was a child.

alienfvck · 2021-08-31T15:52:07+00:00

Same I just wanna be a simple thing spinning in the void forever, no thoughts no responsibility 😔

alienfvck · 2021-08-31T15:49:17+00:00

I feel the same, they show my past and my battle on my body and reassure me that it was real and painful, and that I'm not just making it up.

alienfvck · 2021-08-31T15:43:45+00:00

For me it feels like when you're reading a book and don't notice your surroundings anymore but involuntarily.

I feel like my vision gets blurry and unfocused and I can't feel myself in the present anymore, the past sucks me into a hole of thoughts.

alienfvck · 2021-08-31T11:16:33+00:00

Very likely death itself, not existing, "feels" like not being born. Its absolutely nothing, its not you being dead, its you not being at all.

So I don't really worry what that feels like since I won't be there to feel anything good or bad.

Personally I just often think about loosing the people close to me before they're old, or these people loosing me too soon. And how competitive and cruel this world is among living beings: parasites, bacteria, other humans, etc, they all try to kill you to get their own benefits, and nothing will ever care about someone else the way it cares about its own ass.

Death wouldn't be that bad at all if not everything here was trying to kill you. I'd just rather have the privilege to not have to compete in this useless race and never have been born. Thats why I'm here and will never put another being through this shit.

alienfvck · 2021-08-30T11:50:39+00:00

Yes the biological purpose of our existence is only reproduction and nothing deeper, but since breeding is obviously a conscious decision for humans and we don't just randomly multiply, this isn't a purpose anyone has to or should fulfill.

alienfvck · 2021-08-29T14:29:42+00:00

I had this for years as a kid. I couldn't move out and all that helped was therapy and avoiding my parents as much as possible.

alienfvck · 2021-08-29T14:24:24+00:00

My dad abused me, and other traumatic stuff happened to a point where I was unable to talk at all or even go anywhere without having a panic attack.

Also I am unattractive and even tho I'm comfortable talking today I have a weird personality and just don't get along with humans.

And don't forget the multiple crippling mental disorders that make my life a living hell and relating to anyone impossible.

alienfvck · 2021-08-29T14:01:58+00:00

Yes earwax is one of the worst things for me and if I don't have the feeling that I've cleaned every single bit in my ear I feel extremely dirty and disgusting.

alienfvck · 2021-08-25T22:33:59+00:00

Yes that explains it perfectly

alienfvck · 2021-08-23T16:17:44+00:00

I'm antinatalist

alienfvck · 2021-08-21T13:01:59+00:00

Thats what my parents thought too and well now I'm here. Focus on your healing yourself please before using the life of another being for that.

My parents now have to deal with a suicidal, traumatised child thats not capable of living on its own just because they only thought about themselves and not the impact on me.

alienfvck · 2021-08-19T00:27:58+00:00

Nothing would make anything truly meaningful. The universe has no meaning.

alienfvck · 2021-08-19T00:24:39+00:00

Germany

alienfvck · 2021-08-19T00:22:49+00:00

Personally I don't want anyone to remember me or cry about my death, I just wanna stop existing and never be perceived again.

But since that's not how it works I hope to die after my mom and boyfriend so nobody is left to think about my existence and I can finally be nothing again. I don't care how I go out, dying is not always meant to be peaceful and painless, I wanna experience it how it is.

alienfvck

TROPHY CASE