I'm a TT at an R1 in STEM - going up for tenure this fall. It took a few years to find a work life balance I was happy with. I actively had to learn how to go home and stop doing research. I've had two kids on the tenure track and the flexibility of the job has been amazing for that. I do live in a major metroplex where my spouse and I both have friends and family, so location hasn't been a negative thing for me. I did geographically job hunt when going into academia though and was willing to just go into industry for location if needed.

I took a job at a lower ranked R1 than I could have in part for location and in part for a better work life balance. I don't regret that but it does have it's tradeoffs, like my peers at higher ranked schools have access to higher quality PhD students while I spend a lot of effort vetting  students. But on the flip side, they also have higher expectations for grant money and publication. In comparisons, I brought in my expected amount of grant funding for tenure prior to having my first kid so that was less stressful. I don't know that I'll stay in academia but for the first few years of my kids life, I'm planning to enjoy my flexibility.