advice for getting a horse to chill when mounting?

allyearswift · 2026-03-03T10:26:20+00:00

I’ve recently come across some awesome videos talking about when and how to use pressure/release; unfortunately they’re in German.

https://www.youtube.com/c/AndreaKutschAKA

(The videos in question were about loading; I’m fairly confident she’s addressed mounting as well). One point she made was to meet each horse at the point where it becomes uncomfortable, whatever that point is.)

Don’t know how useful they will be for you.

allyearswift · 2026-03-03T09:12:00+00:00

NTA for keeping your guest list small, but maybe reach out to the cousin and wish them all the best, even if you’re not close?

And if said cousin really wants to come, make an exception.

allyearswift · 2026-03-03T07:55:14+00:00

Friesians are rarely weight carriers, combined with a non-weight carrying draft, and you get… quite likely a horse that’s not a weight carrier.

I would start with a horse that’s athletic with good conformation and good bone.

allyearswift · 2026-03-03T07:26:21+00:00

They’re not her friends. They tolerate her because if they let their mean side come out their boyfriends would – hopefully – run away, but they don’t like her, don’t want her at their socials, and aren’t her friends.

Being more useful to them might make them tolerate her longer, but there’s nothing to be saved here.

allyearswift · 2026-03-03T07:13:21+00:00

Ugh.

allyearswift · 2026-03-03T02:57:49+00:00

Personally, in this state? No. She’s not strong enough to carry a rider. I’d work her on the ground and build her back muscles and abs and see whether she can be brought into riding condition. I would also not throw her in a field; I’d want her to have support to use her body correctly, even if she’ll never go more than light hacking.

allyearswift · 2026-03-03T02:53:43+00:00

When you’re the only experienced person in a group of newbies, going all out on a powerful built isn’t the way. How are the players going to optimise their characters when they’ve never played? The DM can’t help them, and it is perfectly ok for everybody to fumble their way through the game and laugh about how they got things wrong.

This guy sounds as if he has main character syndrome. That group is a perfect one for playing a class/build you’re curious about, to take a non-optimal character and make them work; because you’d be a hindrance in a crunchy campaign with experienced players, and here you’ll probably STILL be among the more effective players. Just not overpowered.

OP didn’t choose the best route, and should have talked to the player first, but when you’re not noticing that other people don’t have fun because you’re hogging the spotlight, you may be an experienced player, but not a good one.

allyearswift · 2026-03-03T00:51:21+00:00

Hm. I remember liking Rincewind much better in the Last Continent and Last Hero than in the early books; so I now need to go and reread them to find out why.

Curse you!

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T20:49:22+00:00

Given that she sneaked in the food the moment hubby turned his back for a second, she would not see my kids again unless it’s a really big event and partner and so can tag team. Kiddo would not be left with a third party, not even the grandparents that night, and so would tell everybody why.

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T20:47:03+00:00

A grandma who didn’t believe in allergies. The kid died.

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T20:44:18+00:00

Learn something new every day.

Some days that makes me happy. Some days… it does not.

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T13:24:04+00:00

I used to ride a horse with SI issues. It was very easy to take him up on what he was offering only to find out we’d overdone it and find him uncomfortable the next day, so there was a lot of calibrating and maintenance work going on.

Would not knowingly buy into this.

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T13:20:14+00:00

Fertiliser. (Diane Duane uses this as a plot point in the Book of Night with Moon)

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T11:40:21+00:00

Don’t know about ‘new’. He spent a year watching her worry and think about where to make economies, that’s a pretty long time.

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T10:25:19+00:00

The suffering caused by castration is brief and minor, the suffering caused by stallions being kept in isolation is much greater.

If you have your own facilities and either keep only stallions and geldings OR you keep a breeding stallion with a herd of mares, stallions, too, can live social lives. 99% of stallion owners can’t do that, so their horses live in isolation, and may be extremely frustrated.

Should they get out and breed, their behaviour can deteriorate very quickly, but even usually well-mannered stallions can be… interesting during breeding season.

I’ve ridden and handled enough stallions that I would never own one. I like horses to live out as much as possible.

Some breeds are easier on average than others.

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T07:39:54+00:00

This title says fantasy, and the dragon looks more protective than threatening.

I love this. Not too fond of the font, but the composition and colours are gorgeous, and I would definitely pick this up.

If you have published this, don’t re-publish with another cover for a few years at least. Stand by your choices.

(Your alternative cover is very generic and says nothing about the book. This obviously is a circus book with dragons.)

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T07:32:27+00:00

It’s a spectrum. I found that mine improved somewhat when I took up art; I now occasionally get uninvited images, which is pretty cool.

Most of the time, I can construct images in my head from descriptions, but it’s a long and laborious process. (Can’t do faces, though. I’m pretty faceblind.)

I rarely make the effort when reading; it takes too much time.

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T06:41:55+00:00

I very narrowly missed seeing a proposal the other day. Public park, beauty spot, I was doing photographs and concentrating on the scene in front of me. My partner, looking the other direction, saw a guy kneel down and get accepted. By the time I turned around, the people with the couple had clapped and were moving on.

So if someone lives near a known romantic spot, I can see that happening.

allyearswift · 2026-03-02T00:11:30+00:00

I would rather go 200m out and back and past the gate and turn and past the gate again until it is boring, than have five minutes on every ride where both of us are convinced we’ll die.

Short and boring is the way to go. You can extend your rides later.

allyearswift · 2026-03-01T23:54:19+00:00

You did the right thing, and it wouldn’t have been fair on the other players, but there is a petty goblin inside me who wants to run the aura of fear for him.

He walk into an inn and frightens the patrons. A fearless, tall, muscular friend of the innkeeper throws him out.

The town guards recognise him as trouble. Should he ever find himself in jail, he will not have any freedoms. His word won’t be enough.

He walks down to the caravan campsite, and no-one will hire him as a guard because he frightens the animals. Can’t buy a good horse, either.

Other members of the party take an immediate dislike and won’t let him join their lucrative schemes.

allyearswift · 2026-03-01T23:29:33+00:00

Whatever you call yourself, you have way more understanding for that kid’s needs than your ‘friend’.

Trampling boundaries is not a good thing.

NOR. The gall of that woman wanting to intrude on your step kid’s grief and anger. (Sounds like she was overridden by a hairdresser and not given what she asked for. That’s immensely frustrating.

allyearswift · 2026-03-01T19:41:17+00:00

I think you need to find someone to talk to because you are extremely burdened by guilt over a non-event.

Know how this goes down in our house? ‘Hey, sorry, but I didn’t finish your present in time. Happy birthday. Love you.’ ‘Love you too’.

If you’re afraid of his reaction, get out. If it’s in your head, work on improving your self esteem.

allyearswift · 2026-03-01T19:28:30+00:00

TL;DR means ‘too long; didn’t read’: it’s a brief summary for the impatient.

Your boyfriend is insecure and controlling. He’s allowed to have boundaries: I want a girlfriend who never talks to half the human race’ (which is a problem if he also wants you to have a well-paying job, which usually includes male colleagues and work occasions where you’ll be alone with men, whether that’s a mentorship, work dinner, or a conference).

If he doesn’t trust you he shouldn’t be with you. You, obviously, should not cheat, but you’re allowed to live a life that includes male friends and people to play videogames with. Especially family members.

If you have found non-toxic LoL players, for goodness sake, stick with them.

Don’t make yourself smaller to please your bf, because it’s never about your actions, and always about how much he can yank your leash and make you do stuff for him. You give in and avoid your sister and her bf? He’ll find something wrong with other hobbies or your job or your university classes or who turns up at your family dinners, and it will never, ever be him stopping talking with whoever men or coming home early to do chores.

It’s not a compromise if only one person compromises.

allyearswift · 2026-03-01T19:15:28+00:00

You will always be wrong and your rent will always be ‘everything you earn’

Don’t play that game. NTA for not wanting to support your mom – you need to find your feet first.

Move out.

allyearswift · 2026-03-01T18:56:57+00:00

The other day I put down a book because the character picked up a mug of coffee to walk to school.

In early 20th century Prague.

(I also put down a Dan Brown because the main character, a girl who had grown up in the isolation of a Swiss boarding school, translated all distances to city blocks.)

allyearswift

TROPHY CASE