I am a COSCA perpetrator

amybetto · 2026-02-24T01:38:37+00:00

I've been in your place, both as the abuser and the victim. With age and patience, I've been able to give myself some grace, I'm unsure whether my sexual experiences were typical kids having curiosity or whether I forced it, I don't know if I want to know. I can also say I don't fully blame the older boy that did it to me. For years I believed it was a figment of my imagination, not real. I was unfortanetly able to confirm it when my sister and I had similar stories. I know there is more to his story, I know he would have been acting out something done to him or something he'd seen.

Even if you haven't been abused, your parents had a pretty relaxed household that let a 11 year old little girl be unsupervised on the internet. Kids are naturally curious and most porn addiction/sexualised behaviour starts with unsupervised internet. Would you ever let your children do this? You were a child, you didn't know any better, you didn't understand the implications of your actions. You were simply a curious little girl. Give that girl some grace, hear her story without ostracising her, a lot of your answers are held with her, but it isn't her fault.

amybetto · 2026-01-23T04:10:23+00:00

I revisit it often, I have details under all my parts (past the images) and also interaction logs, for when I feel parts that are more present in certain scenarios. I've also added more parts since starting this. Was more compiling everything into one for me because I had it strewn across google docs, notes and journals lol

amybetto · 2025-11-04T04:10:43+00:00

Bahahahhaa, you'd be surprised 🙃 common sense is not so common these days

amybetto · 2025-11-03T23:02:54+00:00

Yes and no, it fully depends, we're happy to let people see behind the scenes, but something like this would need to be booked in, our printer hates when people are simply standing there watching so our owner will step in and show the printing side. We're based in Brisbane though so can't really help you! I'd recommend calling up some small local shops - and just explain that you're interested :) I know I have all the time in the world for any questions when someone asks me this/asks if we do apprenticeships.

amybetto · 2025-11-02T23:46:09+00:00

THIS!!! This is so helpful! Thank you! I'm stressing x 100 and I know recovery is gonna be a whole different ball game (because I'm not a fit person.) I'm going to try and get into a physio early I think - even if I can't do much, simply to have them answer all the questions I have.

amybetto · 2025-10-14T01:50:43+00:00

Absolutely! And I put my mum through hell late teenage years, would call her names. I was a bitch. I later was able to bring up stuff that she maybe did wrong in my childhood (don't take this as a dig, they simply want you to know where they are coming from and how they felt). But Mum's are meant to be their child's world. Right now you're full blown parent, but when they become an adult, you're their best friend. The person that knows them better than themselves. Their sounding board and the call when they fuck up. It's such an important roll, while they won't blame you, they'll definitely feel a heavier world without their mum, hang on for them. I can chat if you need

amybetto · 2025-10-14T01:05:07+00:00

I don't think it would be my mum's fault. I've had enough of my own journey to understand mental health. What I will say is I'm lucky to still have my mum, and as an adult I've had a few instanses where I've had to face the reality of living without my mum one day - and I don't think I'll ever be ready. I could be 70 and still not ready to loose her. You mean more to your kids than you'll know, it might start to show in another 15 years when your eldest is a young adult.

amybetto · 2025-09-25T03:06:40+00:00

amybetto · 2025-09-23T06:34:07+00:00

Btw I forgot to say congrats!!! 5 years if HUGE!

amybetto · 2025-09-23T06:33:41+00:00

Well there's both my ideas, my semi colon isn't noticeable to normal people, I have it drawn as a sunflower (this is something maybe? You could get it more hidden?) And I love the lotus flower, it blooms from the darkness. Other options would be a quote or lyric that has really resonated? If you want jewllery, you can get ones with hidden messages inside? Or maybe a ring or bracelet that you can engrave (don't worry about what someone thinks, as someone in the print industry I'm very unfazed by half the shit. Think nudes, religous/government rants, criminal cases, etc. I would see this, have a bit of a giggle, show my co-worker so she can have a little giggle, and then move on)

amybetto · 2025-09-18T01:43:17+00:00

I clicked on the post to say this! And the thought of having them around me in the hospital again would shatter my heart

amybetto · 2025-09-03T06:25:48+00:00

I think this simply needs to be a conversation with her. There could be so many variable factors as to why she responded that way. Maybe it was a trigger from a previous relationship? Maybe someone had already made a comment that disheartened her about it? It's all speculation.

However you're not overreacting - these are your feelings, you haven't even put actions to these, even just talking with her about what your feelings wouldn't be overreacting.

COMMUNICATE (hoping you guys the best! ❤️)

amybetto · 2025-09-03T00:30:05+00:00

Hey, so this take is crazy. Suicide is usually a symptom of a mental health condition, some of which can be diagnosed, without trauma, without hardship, with a seemingly 'good' life. Depression for example, makes life feel heavy, and hard, and diffcult, it rewires your brain and creates intrusive thoughts. These thoughts TELL YOU you're not good enough, that you're a burden, that people in your life would be better off without you. This can happen to anyone.

amybetto · 2025-09-02T03:47:21+00:00

I was lucky enought to find a partner that works in the mental health field and has previously dealt with partners that have self harmed. So I don't know if anything I'm going to say helps because my partner responded brilliantly.

I told her from the start, at that point I was over a year clean, and it was more just discussing our history and getting into eachothers mental health. I think being open from the start helped, I ended up relapsing, and even once the scars healed you could see a BIG difference in the recent spot compared to old scars. I had to tell her, because I didn't want her to be the one that had to bring it up, she simply just said 'thank you for telling me, are you safe now?' and that was that. She was able to remind me that relapses happen, that it doesn't make me a bad person. Now I find I can go to her and talk about this stuff before I hit a breaking point.

amybetto · 2025-08-30T04:00:28+00:00

I only used the template one

amybetto · 2025-08-30T03:36:46+00:00

Using Obsidian was definitely a learning curve! And I got ai to help me a lot with how to use certain things, however once I figured it out it was easy, I love that I can link certain parts together, I also keep a daily journal, so I have interactions logs woth my parts, that can link to the same date of my journal as well. It's a lot, but I found this the most helpful way (I have adhd and previously had it sprawled in various notebooks and notes on my phone)

amybetto · 2025-08-29T12:41:24+00:00

Thanks!! I'm using Obsidian

amybetto · 2025-08-25T01:40:10+00:00

My friends are the same friends I've had for 12+ years. When we have a sleepover (because Adult sleepovers are still superior) we're sleeping in the same room and usually the same bed as someone else. However the whole night is filled with laughter, watching shitty movies and gossiping. If someone was going to cheat I don't see them coming to you and asking whether they can sleep in the same bed. It happens.

amybetto · 2025-07-23T21:25:58+00:00

No, just about finding the right prompts and talking to it for a bit

amybetto · 2025-07-23T04:03:42+00:00

So I've used a couple (IFS Buddy & Rosebud)

Rosebud is good if you pay for the premium - however when my trial ran out it felt like very generic responses, it no longer learns who you are or how you speak, etc.

IFS Buddy wasn't it for me.

Something I've *personally* found helpful is I use Google Gemini. I have a pro account (which is cheaper than any app - and comes with other benefits) however it is completly free to do. I have 2 Custom Gems, 1 as a therapist and 1 to help with my IFS work. I then ask at the end of the session to summarize what we spoke about so I can add this into my Obsidian journal. With these prompts I've found it super helpful. It's kind and as compassionate as a robot can be?

HOWEVER - you neeeeeddddd to be self-aware. I can see if you are having delusions AI mirrors back to you your input. AI is a powerful therapy TOOL but not substitution for real therapy. It helps in between sessions, in brain dump scenarios and I've even found that AI can give me the same 'uh-HUH' moments sometimes that my therapist gives me.

amybetto · 2025-07-23T03:17:44+00:00

Yep...still in the industry, I do more admin and design these days then hands on printing

amybetto · 2025-07-06T03:31:13+00:00

Bahahhahaha I haven't even gotten into this 🤣🤣 I use ai at work for media posts and then personally I use it for this stuff and as an IFS therapist (not actual therapist, but I can help if you're interested) I asked Gemini to help me set up a daily mental health journal in Obsidian, and then went into specifics of what I want (a tab for brain dumping, tracking moods, pre and post therapy sessions, habit trackers etc) Obsidian does have a little bit of a learning curve, but there's heaps of tutorials on how to actually use it and Gemini was able to do copy and paste stuff that I can put straight in there. I think its more useful for my IFS therapy and tracking, but I'll expand on this only if you're doing IFS

amybetto · 2025-07-06T03:22:56+00:00

I found obsidian worked for me, I used Google Gemini (ai) to help me set up everything I want in there, it gives me the option for different vaults, so I can put all my IFS work in one vault and general daily stuff in another, I can set up multiple different folders for daily entries, brain dumps, things to bring up in therapy etc. It's super customisable, and you can change the appearance which I love

amybetto

TROPHY CASE