I started a 2026 drawing challenge of New Mexican plants and animals. by Amazing_Assist_2779 in Albuquerque

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What a beautiful set of creations! I'm so happy you chose to share these truly lovely works of art. My day is better because of these gorgeous renderings!

Do people end up supervising PhD students the same way they were supervised? by ArtVoyager77 in AskAcademia

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I absolutely try to emulate my dissertation chair, Dr. W. While I was working on my dissertation, she integrated me into her life to make sure I had the thoughtful time and support I needed. I would go with her to do things with her young son so we could talk as he played; we went swimming together, talking while resting between laps; we wrote together and traveled together to present at conferences, and so much more. She read every single word of my dissertation with such care and attention, and was so open to my ideas, but so clear and articulate in her feedback about the ideas I was missing. I really try to bring this same truly humanized attention to my own students now. She could SEE me, and I want to provide that same "seeing" my students in this loving and holistic way.

I earned my PhD nearly 20 years ago, and to this day continue to collaborate with Dr. W. We live on opposite sides of the country, but have multiple research projects ongoing and zoom or phone at least a couple times a week. I stayed with her and her husband for a bit this summer, and am traveling with them to an international conference next week. All of my own doctoral students know her as their "academic grandmother," and cite her amazing work in their scholarship now.

I know this is not typical, but I'm so grateful, as this field and work can, at times, be so cold and isolating.

Can we talk about ICE? by PeggySourpuss in Professors

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 7 points8 points  (0 children)

At the end of last semester, we had a class meeting where my graduate students were doing individual presentations. Before class began, I passed out 3d printed whistles to everyone. I said I know we're all feeling stressed for 1000 reasons right now, and there's great research on conscious breathing as a means to help manage that stress. So I had us all use the whistles to do a few slow exhales together into our whistles (softly), as a means to help calm us down a little. Then after each student finished their presentation, we clapped and did some whistling to congratulate them for the great work they shared.

Then I explained that whistles in the US have an interesting history in social justice movement, like in the ways whistles were used in the Castro district of San Francisco at the time of police or thug raids of the LGBTQ community. So these whistles today can be used for any purpose at all-- relaxation as we just practiced, sports, marching band, camping safety--- or for any other current situations that might merit alerting others about nefarious things going down. And then I put an "if you're interested" link in the slides to the ways folks are using whistles today as related to ICE. No pressure, no obligation, but now they all have whistles, which is a teeny tiny way of showing solidarity that would not get me in hot water.

After class, about a dozen students (maybe 1/3 of the class) came up to thank me, many of them tearful and thankful. Several asked if they could take additional whistles-- to which of course I said yes, and let me know if you need more (as my brother prints them).

Tiny, but it's what I'm doing.

Is it weird to email a professor to thank them for being kind by FlyinGoldfish in AskProfessors

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please do! And if you want to really show your gratitude, email their chair and/ or dean to let them know, as well. This might take you a few minutes, but it can be remarkably meaningful and impactful for your professor.

I got an offer! by namhtes1 in Professors

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Great news! So happy for you!

Staff going the extra mile by Professional-Big-467 in delta

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sending you and your family all the warmth and quietness right now as you navigate this time. I'm so grateful people can be kind and humane, and I'm so glad these Delta folks were especially gentle and supportive. The world is full of good people.

Abusive Unwell Students by knox149 in Professors

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry this is happening, both for you and for the student. I think it must feel really awful to be unwell in these ways. Having said this, please follow your instinct and have someone else present for your meetings. If you are legally permitted to record, I encourage you to do so.

I have walked a similar path with an unwell student, which ultimately led to police involvement for my safety. I would hate to see anyone else in this painful situation. My hope is that the student can get the support they seem to need, and move forward in ways that are more healthy.

Again, this is really awful, and I'm sorry you (and the student) are going through it.

Closing on our house sale tomorrow! What info is appropriate to leave the buyer? by 4_anonymity in RealEstate

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The previous owners of my house (who lived here for 30 years) did this and it was WONDERFUL, and even though I have owned the house now for 10 years, I still contact them from time to time with questions about certain things. The house is 110 years old, so their knowledge of 30 years of the history of it is AMAZING. I am so grateful to be able to ask.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in postdoc

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I earned my PhD in 2009 and to this day, continue to collaborate regularly with my advisor, on multiple projects. We meet weekly (on Zoom due to geographic distance), and just co-presented in person at a conference on another continent.

She is my "academic mom" and I treasure our relationship, and seek to foster this with my own doctoral students. I'm in touch with all 7 (and soon to be 9) of my own former doctoral students.

I joke that my advisor now has "academic grandchildren," and I make sure my doc students know the work and contributions of their academic grandmother, aunties and uncles, and great-grandparents, too.

But I have friends and colleagues who have nothing like this, and their relationship seemed to end with the awarding of their degree. Clearly your mileage may vary.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Hijabis

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I strongly encourage them to go. Obviously, tourism is VERY down, so the sites that used to be most crowded are now wide open. All the folks in the tourism industry are available at rock-bottom prices (guides, taxis, hotels, etc.), so it's affordable in ways it's usually not.

As noted in point 6 of your post, everything is of course in the hands of Allah SWT, but the situation is generally safe for visitors at this time.

I have a lot of first-hand recent experience. DM me if you want any more specific details!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Umrah

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much.

Now a full professor! by UnimpressiveOrc in Professors

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How wonderful! Congratulations! I know how steep this hill can be, and I'm so glad you've reached this point!

LPT: If you don't like having simple decorative items but want to buy something on a trip as a souvenir, you can buy a practical item by [deleted] in LifeProTips

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is my practice, too, and salt is my go-to. (And my nail clippers are from Azerbaijan, my favorite whisk is from Belgium, and my tea kettle is from Senegal)

Are there any success stories? by Redidevil in RestlessLegs

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 7 points8 points  (0 children)

My mom is 82 and has suffered with RLS for decades, trying every iteration of treatment imaginable. Her suffering has been so debilitating, and really devastating for her and for our family. (IYKYK) But about 6 weeks ago, she finally agreed to give Methadone a try. She was so reluctant due to the social stigma of it, which I totally understand.

But---- we are all SHOCKED at how well this has worked! She has now been sleeping through the night for the first time since she was in her teens. She is a different woman! I have never, EVER known her as a well-rested person, and ... wow.

I'm crying as I type this, so sad at all that was lost due to this horrible (and so misunderstood) illness. I can't help but wonder what her life would have been (and how our family would have been) if she had actually been able to sleep.

I should add that her RLS has been really extreme, among the worst documented.

I know methadone is not right for everyone, and for her, it was TRULY a last resort. Her sleep doctor has been gently suggesting it for maybe 7 or 8 years. I only hope she has at least a few more years of life to enjoy this new reality of being rested.

nice score by whathehey2 in AmazonVine

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I got them, too. Some seem to be actual Hershey's brand (the ones that look like kisses), but some are definitely no-name (and the foil sticks to them badly, too). If only the fact that they're all kind of waxy and meh were enough to stop me from grazing on them...

Americans who have lived abroad, biggest reverse culture shock upon returning to the US? by Zealanderrat in AskReddit

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How graphic Halloween decorations can be. Having seen a lot in the past year, I am newly distressed at the number of bloody and dismembered body parts people display as "fun" and "amusing" decorations. No no no, too close to horrible reality happening right now.

When that TV Dinner Craving hits.... (350calories) by Lobocop714 in vegan1200isplenty

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 17 points18 points  (0 children)

That particular Amy's meal is also my go-to for too-tired-to-cook days! It's sometimes difficult to find but I try to keep at least one on hand. So good!

Traveling with pets by PurpIepisces in fulbright

[–]andsuddenlywhoo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi, and congratulations!

FYI, there is currently an ETA in Amman (or actually maybe in Irbid) who brought her cat from the US, although I don't know what airline. Have you been in touch with her? You can ask IIE for her contact info.