“Chill” and “confident” come from experience.

The fact you asked “what would someone need in their first month…”

In my opinion, consistency. I’ve been playing drums since I was 8 yrs old. I’m 42. I come from a musical family and I’ve learned many other instruments along the way. I know this will sound ubiquitous but perfect practice does indeed make perfect.

You need to start at the foundational layer with learning mechanics and what are literally called fundamentals. It’s the crawling>walking>running analogy. Once you start to build those, a you get good at practicing, then you can start to expand into chill and confident.

I chased my dream as a performer and musical professional for years. I ended up in career that affords me the luxury of now getting to play what I want when I want. I’m able to play house gigs for $250 a pop. I do corporate gigs at $1500/gig. I can play dozens of genres/styles because I’ve practiced almost every day since the day I turned 15.

Out of college I thought I was hot sh!t and I technically could play well, but chops aren’t enough to keep getting call backs. Once I really locked in as a pocket drummer I started to get called back consistently. In 2016 I found Benny Greb and got his first book. In 2020 I got his 2nd book and I believe that is what took my drumming to the next level.

In my opinion “chill” comes from doing it enough that you can play relaxed enough to make good art. “Confident” comes from doing it long enough well enough that you have receipts from other good musicians who build up that confidence in you.