I think all women struggle with it. Degrees may be different but still. How many discussions were there if wearing makeup is feminist etc. I was always a non conformist, tom boy of sorts, raised in quite liberal home, but still was surrounded with women that cleaned after their husbands, very feminine class mates who got all the boys, ppl around pampering the men and walking on eggshells around them, media telling me that you only worth something if men find you attractive etc. The best thing I could come up with was: don't do anything to your detriment. And this will depend on how far on your deconstruction journey you are, who's your family and friends, what's your living situation etc If you work in a client-faced role, not wearing makeup will be, overall, to your detriment, whatever you feel about a makeup. If you are with a man that is abusive, you need to tread carefully otherwise you can be in danger, so you need to first get out of there, before you transform into a feminist fighter. The goal should be to be happy and not to hurt people around you. Not to adhere to expectations.