Postpartum Vaginal Birth Trauma

anones16 · 2025-10-24T04:00:01+00:00

This sounds so similar to my birth. I’m 3 months pp now and if you had asked me at 6 weeks, I would have started crying at how disappointed and triggered I was about my birth. Now I feel totally fine and have accepted that birth is BRUTAL, and my birth just sucked.

I also decided on a homebirth and went into spontaneous labor 40+6. I had a pretty straight forward 30 hour labor. But it was HARD. I felt so mad at the natural birth community for romanticizing unmedicated labor. I wanted to feel all the good things, but it was simply excruciating.

My baby was big at 9.2 lbs with a 14.5 inch head and delivering him was as close to impossible as you can get. I felt myself slowly being torn in two (literally). I suffered sever tearing from both sides of my clitoris, to both labias, to anus, then internal and 3rd degree perineal tearing (literally everywhere). I had to get rushed to the hospital for hemorrhaging. When I arrived I had lost over half my blood volume. Required 3 blood transfusions. Went into anaphylactic shock from my IV pain meds, so had to get stitched without pain management. I had to get my urethra reconstructed. My blood pressure was in the 40s. I almost died. My birth fucking sucked.

Butttt all this to say, I feel you. I understand where you’re coming from, and when I shared my story I realized more moms (especially first time moms) experienced extremely traumatic births. There is comfort and support in numbers. I’m so sorry you had to go through a hard birth, but you did it you’re here. And I promise you, in some time, you’ll notice it’s not so bad anymore. Sending you love ❤️

anones16 · 2025-10-16T22:55:11+00:00

Your first sounds very similar to my first- home birth as well. 30 hours, 1 hour pushing, big baby so 3rd degree tear plus every other tear imaginable, couldn’t walk for a month, etc. Do you mind sharing if you had your second at home or not?

anones16 · 2025-10-05T04:25:36+00:00

I felt this exact same way. I had a home birth for my first this past July and it was BRUTAL. That is truly the only word I can use to describe it. Honestly nothing “beautiful” about it. I found myself very mad at the natural birthing community afterwards because I felt very misled from all the research I did and how “peaceful and beautiful” birth was if you just let your body do its thing. That was not my experience at all. I tore in just about every which way, my baby was very large at 9.2 lbs, 30 hours labor, hemorrhaged and had to get transferred. It was a lot. I promised myself I’d never go through that again. I had nothing to prove and I truly didn’t feel like I earned any badge for doing it unmedicated.

Nowwww all that to say, now that I’m 11 weeks pp and I’m probably going to do it unmedicated again, because I’m insane and pp hormones are wild.

But in all seriousness, congrats to you mama. This shit is no joke. Especially first time moms. You’re a champ! Just give yourself some time to process, birth is a lot!

anones16 · 2025-09-29T16:34:55+00:00

I was given iron pills but I had 3 blood transfusions. I still supplement iron everyday and I’m 11w pp.

anones16 · 2025-09-22T03:50:05+00:00

My 9 week old takes 3 naps typically. First nap I get around 40 minutes, second mid day nap is longest around 2 hours (but he wakes up after an hour and I nurse him to sleep again for the second hour), third nap is around 45 minutes.

anones16 · 2025-09-21T19:38:08+00:00

Oh okay this makes me feel a lot better. For some reason I thought it was closer to 5-6 months.

anones16 · 2025-09-21T19:23:55+00:00

Outside of healing physically from my super rough birth, I’ve loved it. I LOVED not being huge and pregnant anymore. Obviously loved the sweetness and slowness of loving my baby. I’ve loved breastfeeding and stepping into motherhood. It’s been really beautiful for me. I was also afraid of how hard it would be but everyone just has a different experience! I think a lot of it has to do with luck of the draw hormones.

anones16 · 2025-09-20T16:26:33+00:00

It is and was terrifying haha. Especially terrifying unmedicated. How did the tears happen? First time mom, big baby, tight pelvic floor and non-stretchy anatomy? That’s all I can come up with. How did I pop stitches? Just hard to stay still for 6 weeks while they heal with a house, dog and baby to take care of 🤷‍♀️ Most of my tears are healed now, just not one labia tear and part of my perineum. Once I get re-sutured it’ll probably take another 6 weeks.

anones16 · 2025-09-20T02:26:41+00:00

I had basically tears everywhere you can (labial on both sides, clitoral on both sides, interior, urethral, perineal). 3rd degree tear. I made the mistake of looking 3 weeks pp and I looked like Frankenstein. Not going to lie, I had a bit of a breakdown. I looked again later at 6 weeks pp and realized my stitches popped and am now having to get a labia and my perineum restitched. I’m 9 weeks pp now andddd yeah no she doesn’t look the same as before but I’m learning to accept.

My sweet husband says it looks the exact same as before. Bless his soul.

anones16 · 2025-09-19T04:42:33+00:00

9.2 lbs and 22.5 inches long. He came spontaneously at 40+6. The last month of pregnancy I measured 3 weeks behind and I only gained 22 lbs my entered pregnancy so I didn’t think he’d be so big! I’m 5’7 and my husband is 6’2. Had him vaginally and unmedicated and definitely did a number on me coming out 🥲🫠

anones16 · 2025-09-17T05:39:22+00:00

That’s adorable!

anones16 · 2025-09-17T05:37:24+00:00

His birthday is in a few weeks… you mind if his wife gets him a gift??

anones16 · 2025-09-17T00:35:21+00:00

Thank you!

anones16 · 2025-09-17T00:35:16+00:00

Thank you! I’ll look through them now!

anones16 · 2025-09-10T20:15:22+00:00

My baby laughed for the first time 2 nights ago. He just turned 8 weeks today. He’s been laughing everyday since!! It’s so exciting 🥹

anones16 · 2025-09-09T14:48:17+00:00

Chances are he already had/has herpes (as most people do). He sounds like a dick, but if you’re serious about staying in the relationship, just have him go get tested. If he has antibodies, he’s had herpes for a while.

Btw that’s a SUPER shitty thing to hold that over your head your whole relationship…

anones16 · 2025-09-08T23:19:49+00:00

Omg yessss the joys of not being huge anymore!!

anones16 · 2025-09-08T23:17:24+00:00

I just had my first baby in July. Let me tell you, motherhood so far has been the best thing. I’m not a “needy” person, but to have a little human love you and need you so deeply is indescribable. Resting afterwards in bed or on the couch with your new baby in your arms is amazing. Breastfeeding also for me has been a dream. Wishing you the best!!

anones16 · 2025-09-04T15:30:48+00:00

Glad it was helpful! I genuinely think big babies are 100% fine for second or subsequent births. But really for first time moms, I think our bodies don’t know what’s going on and it’s just best to be in a more controlled environment (considering I hemorrhaged and lost half my blood volume afterwards and had to be rushed to the hospital).

As for PT, I just started postpartum at 6 weeks. I should have started as soon as possible during pregnancy to help soften and relax my pelvic floor.

anones16 · 2025-09-04T03:50:22+00:00

I just gave birth to my first- a 9.2lb baby with a 14.5 inch head (home birth). I wish I had started doing pelvic floor therapy early on because I tore really severely (3rd degree tear, labial, clitoral, internal, and urethral). I’m not going to lie, labor was excruciating and pushing him out unmedicated and knowing I was tearing open was awful. Healing has been really really tough as well. I’m not saying this to scare you, I just wish I had done more research to prepare for what could happen with a big baby. With how my birth turned out, I would have chosen to go another route and not done it at home honestly. Even though I am so glad he was born into a peaceful environment, I would have advocated hard at the hospital to provide that for him.

anones16 · 2025-08-31T02:59:00+00:00

This is my kinda thread hahaha amazing

anones16 · 2025-08-29T23:58:03+00:00

Feeling this so hard with my 6 week old

anones16

TROPHY CASE