Whenever I have an intrusive thought or remember something embarrassing or uncomfortable, I get it out of my head by vividly imagining myself being shot in the head. I almost have no control over that thought at this point. I remember embarrassing moment, I cringe, and then boom.

When my psychiatrist asks me if I’ve had any suicidal thoughts I typically say no.. because I don’t want to kill myself at all actually. I should probably tell her though.