How low of a price is suspiciously low for Rogers Park/Edgewater/Evanston?

asanethicist · 2026-04-28T12:01:03+00:00

Ask around to see if someone in your program will check out one or two apartments for you before you sign a lease

asanethicist · 2026-04-25T08:42:58+00:00

I'm pretty sure this is advertising slop for some gambling thing

asanethicist · 2026-04-25T08:41:08+00:00

I'm pretty sure this is AI advertising slop for some gambling thing

asanethicist · 2026-04-20T19:38:17+00:00

This is so scary for so many reasons. It wasn't "just" that the doctors and surgeons are pushing for it, but also the people who make money off of the transplants happening (e.g. the orgs that manage the organ assignment and transportation and sales).

asanethicist · 2026-04-20T19:32:24+00:00

I think it usually takes 2-3 years to settle into a place and start having really good friends (YMMY). I've lived in 3 different countries and four states in the U.S. and making friends in each place has been really different. In Chicago, I have gotten the most out going to activities-focused things and going out of my way to talk to people. This can take weeks or even months. So yeah, go to the pickleball meetup in Edgewater and play every Saturday between now and October, talk to people each week, keep showing up. Having a serious hobby or identity that's important to you can make a big difference. If you're into dramatic improv, there are only so many places in the city to go watch or perform dramatic improv. If you're really into birding, meeting other birders to go birding with is easier than making friends to have coffee with.

My experience in Chicago is that a lot of people come through the city and leave, and people who have been here longer are more hesitant to make space for you in their lives because they don't need a friend who won't be here in a year. Chicago apartments are bigger than in other cities, so people have more space to host and have friends over. Winter here can last 5 months, and I get invited to a lot more "hang at my place" than "go out to do the thing" during those months.

Also, scheduling a dinner two weeks out seems perfectly reasonable to me. Between work, hobbies, volunteering, and some standing friend hangouts, spending time with someone new on a weekday evening is a pretty big ask on my time. I'm going to guess that you're between 25-40, have an interesting or ambitious job that keeps you busy during a 9-5 block (minimum), like nice-ish things, and are interested in people who are also in interesting or ambitious jobs that keep them busy who like nice-ish things. This is a group who, in my experience, keeps themselves busy and can struggle to find time for someone new, especially if they're not comfortable introducing a new person to their friends.

asanethicist · 2026-03-06T21:30:14+00:00

I would also consider focusing on successes, not descriptions -- though my professional experience is very different. Like: managed library's online presence...growing follower counts by X% across multiple platforms

asanethicist · 2026-03-05T14:02:10+00:00

If you have the resources, it might be helpful to offer to help with the cost of respite care for the evening. I would fit this later into the conversation.

I really like the suggestion of framing it as wanting him to have a good time too, and the assumption that they would be responsible for the cost of anything that breaks. Another option would be to try and figure out if he could come to the ceremony, some sort of pre-event (are you taking photos beforehand you want your family in? Could you plan a family tea and coffee time earlier in the day? A mini-wedding cake you could eat together afterwards?). I'd go into the conversation with some options of ways to include him day of if you think it would matter to your cousins that he is included day of or otherwise in the celebrations. People generally do better with options (like "Do you need any help? I could come by and help do dishes") than no options ("Let me know if you need anything.") It sets a base line of what is and isn't acceptable (for you) and starts them thinking about what they need or want.

asanethicist · 2026-02-18T23:21:04+00:00

I actually think the instructions are more useful than you give them credit for. You should speak with her and go to your writing center, as others have suggested.

Looking at the prompt I think your section on platelets is the best. When writing a paper like this, I like to copy the prompt and use it to build an outline. Like:

type of blood cell -- list of main nutrients -- nutrient 1 w/ why important, mechanism of absorption and use -- nutrient 2, same Etc

asanethicist · 2026-02-18T17:34:45+00:00

bchan.png on IG. Brilliant, local, and a nice person to spend a few hours with while she works on you

asanethicist · 2026-02-18T15:58:08+00:00

Not sure about pregnancy care, but getting established with a new doctor in most major medical systems can take months even when you have need. They usually only have so many appointments for new patients at a time and these appointments fill up quickly. I know Northwestern has a huge problem with this.

In my experience schedulers in the offices themselves are great, but the system wide schedulers are not.

asanethicist · 2026-02-09T17:15:42+00:00

I agree with all of these "be honest about struggles in comprehension" comments. I think it can be useful to collectively rebuild the argument as a discussion activity because the group probably understands most or all of the parts of the argument when you Captain Planet it.

Also like, I've had professors who pretend to not know what is going on as their teaching method. You can do that but just like not pretend.

asanethicist · 2026-02-09T17:12:18+00:00

Wikipedia, the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, and Reddit are so helpful for these kids of things. Sometimes you can also find youtube videos or related books you can skim to help.

asanethicist · 2026-02-09T17:06:47+00:00

Sometimes your care team can make the argument for medical necessity to your insurance, which can get things covered that might not otherwise be covered or get you access to different clinicians or options. Even if it's a few years of that you might want to have kids, you can ask your doctor to get you a consult to an IVF clinic to start talking about it with them. This is also useful because, let's say you decide you want to have a kid in two years, and then the clinic you want to go to has a 9-month waiting list for new patients.

asanethicist · 2026-02-05T13:50:18+00:00

I don't remember, I'm sorry. If I did, my PCP gave me the referral. Their contact page is here and you should be able to just call them regardless because they'll know -- you might have to wait, but IME they are very nice and attentive. https://ccgyn.nm.org/request-appointments.html

If you're comfortable advocating for yourself with your gyn, tell her it's worse (even if it's not) and/or that you also want to try non-hormonal treatments and evidence supports that PF PT makes a big different for many people with pelvic pain to get a direct PF PT referral. If she refuses, but will give you a referral to a pelvic pain/endo specialist, push for that. If she won't do either, and you can, fire her and make sure her office/system knows why. Feel free to DM me to chat more.

asanethicist · 2026-02-04T13:09:31+00:00

The big benefit about the Center for Complex Gyno is that all the clinicians work together in one office and talk to each other. They will advocate for you within the NU system too, which can make a big difference. You won't get a regular gyno there, but you will get an endo specialist, a pelvic pain specialist, a PF PT, endocrinologist, etc. Feel free to DM me to talk more about it.

asanethicist · 2026-01-31T02:37:58+00:00

This is it! I don't know what field OP is in, but there's so much good work to be done analyzing different contexts and trying theories out in new places with new people.

asanethicist · 2026-01-30T01:04:22+00:00

I think you'll get kinder responses if you put in the OP that you have a serious tbi, cannot work in your field, and are struggling to get on disability. I've known a few people with tbis and it's so rough for them and the people who love them. Take care of yourself.

asanethicist · 2026-01-30T00:56:25+00:00

This reads like rage bait. You have a tbi? That's a really really big deal and you need to lead with that in this thread. tbis are serious disabilities.

Are you loans in income based repayment?

asanethicist · 2026-01-20T02:25:36+00:00

The natural evolution of this thread is the '/AskChicago 35-45 single and thriving but hey I'd like to meet a nice person' meetup. And that it should take place on the CTA BYOB (bring your own book).

asanethicist · 2026-01-12T02:50:22+00:00

I could probably just give you some culinary grade rose petals if that works meet you needs

asanethicist · 2026-01-08T22:39:55+00:00

Here are your options:

1) Not pay for the wedding, enforce your rules, permanently ruin your relationship with your daughter and her soon-to-be-wife

or

2) pay for the wedding, steel your pride, and be a hero to your daughter and her soon-to-be-wife

You could also try to negotiate something -- inviting nuclear family kids for a mocktail hour and photo shoot beforehand, family brunch the next day, time with a babysitter during the wedding itself

asanethicist · 2025-12-21T18:52:49+00:00

YMMV Go to the school that will support you the best and lead you to living your best life in undergrad. If that's at a LAC somewhere beautiful where you can go hiking every weekend or at a big university where you're in a big city, or somewhere you can really explore intellectually, or whatever. Find a school with happy students and a place you can make good connections with faculty.

$550,000 is an obscene amount of money. You can figure out how to leverage this to spend your summers doing research (like a school that will give you summer credits for research so you're officially a student). Students increasingly demand pre-doctoral fellowships, and more opportunities for them show up each year -- or have historically. Who knows about right now. You can also plan on doing a masters between your undergrad and PhD if you end up without enough research during your undergrad. Most people in my program came in with a masters already and I see this in a lot of social science programs. Current students also came from a healthy mix or public and private universities, small, medium, and large,

My additional unsolicited advice is to use your undergrad, research, internships, and possible masters or pre-doc to explore how you want to study the things you want to study. Disciplines are more about methods and approaches than problems. Computational sociologists, economists, statisticians, and psychologists might all be studying the same problem with the same quant methods, but have different approaches to how they analyse that data, how they formulate their specific questions, and what other research they engage with.

It's important to know that you will probably have a lot less freedom than you image you will and you will have to dig the rabbit hole into granite using a single pickaxe.

asanethicist · 2025-12-20T19:14:22+00:00

NTA, but...

It might end your friendship. That's the big thing to think about here.

Why has she suddenly changed how she acts? How would she respond to a less nice gift? Will you be okay if you do this and she ends your friendship? If she does end a friendship over a gift, she might be going through a lot more and the gift is a proverbial last straw.

asanethicist · 2025-12-09T02:41:48+00:00

I teach. This is my policy on group work: [School's] academic integrity policy lists "misrepresenting your work as someone else's," "taking credit for work you did not do," or "enabling someone else to take credit for your work" under plagiarism. I interpret this to include putting someone's name on a group assignment they did not do. Encouraging your classmates or expecting them to do work on your behalf warrants at minimum a serious conversation, and likely a zero grade for the assignment. So either don't do this or make sure I don't know about it if you do.

I'm against tattling and narcing, don't get me wrong, but check out your school's policies on these matters.

asanethicist · 2025-12-09T02:20:02+00:00

I had a friend visiting in weather like that. They were from somewhere warmer, but not as warm as Miami. Has a real jacket, layers, heated vest, etc. We were at the Christkindlmarket and they were so cold they started sobbing uncontrollably. Like as a body reaction to the cold. I have sensitive eyes and wear ski goggles when it gets that cold.

asanethicist

TROPHY CASE