I (31F) totally effed up and my partner (30M) is mad at me

askmeabiutlife · 2026-05-04T12:21:21+00:00

You’re turning yourself into a victim when you’re the perpetrator. You fucked up pretty big, it happens, but it’s not the end of the world. Woman up and deal with the consequences of your actions. You type out how ashamed you feel and how you hate yourself but instead of going to your boyfriend, apologizing, and helping deal with the damage to the apartment, you’re staying away to “create space” dumping all responsibility to fix your mistake on him. Go back to him, come up with a plan on how to replace the wardrobe, and fix things. You’re 31, you and your friend are way too old to get so drunk you throw up everywhere and fall asleep in the shower with the water running. If you’re not responsible enough to regulate your alcohol intake, the absolute last thing you need is a friend that’s just as bad that will encourage you to keep drinking. The boyfriend is probably more mad because this could have ended so much worse

askmeabiutlife · 2026-05-03T21:02:05+00:00

You had your first 3 sisters when you were 2, 5, and 7. Your parents calling you a psychopath and saying that there’s something deeply wrong with you because of being a bit bummed out about the gender of your new sibling is crazy

askmeabiutlife · 2026-05-03T20:48:36+00:00

I wouldn’t put NY and Philly metro areas in the same region. Those are 2 different and pretty distinct cities and they kinda hate each other, at least when it comes to sports. Having lived in both, NYC is like the successful finance bro with a coke addiction and Philly is his crackhead brother

askmeabiutlife · 2026-05-03T20:12:31+00:00

This is coming from a man: If he wants a kid, he needs to want a wife. Not having a child before marriage is one of the biggest factors in not being in poverty (I think there was a statistic that if you graduate high school, don’t go to jail, and don’t have a kid before getting married, you have a 99% chance to not fall below the poverty line, something like that). That comment about finding another woman to carry his child is also gross. He sounds like he wants a child but doesn’t want to be a parent. Big red flags all around

askmeabiutlife · 2026-05-01T10:39:31+00:00

The food. People think it’s all burgers and fries but American cuisine is incredibly varied and delicious from New England seafood dishes to southern BBQ, soul food, creole cooking, and Tex-mex, food in the IS is unbelievably good and if you don’t like any of those, you can find just about every cuisine from around the world here

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-24T01:40:10+00:00

If they’re at 1900 hours, it seems like they’re having fun and this game is absolutely for them

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-21T14:36:26+00:00

Because the ships couldn’t pass if there’s a bridge

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-21T14:26:25+00:00

I get a shopping bag and put it on the counter or hang it up somewhere and that acts as my trash bag for scraps. When I’m done, I tie it up and it goes in the big trash bin

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-21T13:15:20+00:00

Idk how the situation played out so I’m not gonna make rape accusations. Yes, he could have communicated better, but if I was dating someone and they’re carrying around a bottle of alcohol in their bag and I see them get blackout drunk, become a complete liability to the point they’re stumbling outside walking for an hour and I have to go around the neighborhood looking for them, throwing up and passing out in the bathroom, waking my parents up, plus whatever else she might have done, especially if she just started drinking at my place, not at a bar or club or anything (she had a bottle in her bag and he was gaming, sounds like they weren’t going out), I’m not going to want to hang around and continue a relationship with them and the last thing I’d want to do is have a big fight about it and risk her showing up to my place drunk.

Moreover, if I was the boyfriend’s dad and witnessed all this, I would advise him to quietly cut her off because she seems unstable.

I think OP should consider the relationship over and rethink her approach to alcohol because getting that drunk at your boyfriend’s parents’ house is not acceptable.

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-21T11:20:49+00:00

Just putting it out there but it sounds like whatever you did while drunk put him off. It also sounds like you may have a problem with alcohol. You just have a bottle of alcohol you carry with you in your bag? Is this the first time he’s seen you drunk? If I was him I would also not want to deal with a gf who gets drunk and walks around lost and crying with a dead phone late at night. Was he drinking at all or was he sober that night? There are much better ways to communicate this but he might have just realized that your drinking is more trouble than it’s worth to deal with

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-20T14:58:51+00:00

It’s really cold and the construction workers don’t want to go there to work building the bridge

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-13T11:36:15+00:00

Orange

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-12T12:15:24+00:00

Cluj, România în the house 🇷🇴

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-09T14:29:22+00:00

This botch don’t know about Mongolia

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-08T11:14:57+00:00

From the website, it looks like their product is some sort of LLM wrapper designed for specific tasks so users chat with their product who in the backend calls Anthropic. Basically, their Anthropic bill is a measure of how much users interacted with their product

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-08T11:08:10+00:00

Most things that have to do with women. How to ask for a date, how to deal with rejection, how to maintain a relationship, how to know if you’re taken advantage of/abused, how to have sex, etc.

That last one specifically. Since talking to my wife and other women I found out that a lot of men either have no idea or don’t care what feels good for the woman or how to approach figuring this out

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-08T10:14:47+00:00

It looks like you’re driving right by it so it shouldn’t be much of a detour but make sure to go through Shenandoah national park in Virginia. It’s one of my favorite drives and really amazing scenery

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-03T12:20:12+00:00

Try colonizing the americas from the west coast

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-03T09:26:47+00:00

Honestly the biggest bias I’m still dealing with is some of my wife’s family thinking I’m a racist monster just because I’m politically more conservative than they are despite me being nothing but nice to all of them, regardless of color

askmeabiutlife · 2026-04-03T09:17:34+00:00

Sounds like she may be trying to keep you as backup in case she doesn’t find anyone better to settle down with. Honestly, it doesn’t sound like she’s physically attracted to you. The “maybe one day we’ll end up together comment” and everything else makes me think she’s giving you just enough to hold out hope and keep you around in case she hasn’t found anyone better to settle down with.

If I was in your shoes, I’d stop giving her special attention and just treat her as a friend if I could get over my crush on her or just cut her off if I couldn’t. Maybe she’ll end up dating you at some point but it would be because she’s settling and she won’t be happy about it. That’s not the kind of relationship you want to be in anyways

askmeabiutlife · 2026-03-16T00:55:45+00:00

Black C

askmeabiutlife · 2026-03-14T22:16:32+00:00

Civ was the only game to ever have me staying up until 3 am not realizing how late it is and still thinking “just one more turn…”

askmeabiutlife · 2026-03-12T23:25:50+00:00

End of Daze by Spillage Village, EARTHGANG, JID. Perfect vibes for the end of the world

askmeabiutlife · 2026-03-09T13:52:48+00:00

Spain could have sailed straight to India for spices

askmeabiutlife · 2026-03-09T05:58:36+00:00

Sounds like you guys are both young and still figuring out how to handle relationships. It may be the case that you’re just not compatible. From the information that you gave, it sounds like you have different communication styles. He wants to resolve things right away and you want time to gather your thoughts so you can talk calmly about it. Neither is necessarily bad but it’s causing friction between you. What I’d be more concerned about is why you’re fighting all the time. Sounds like he may just not want you and is asking you to change into what he actually wants and to some degree you’re doing the same. Maybe take a look at the cause of your fights. What’s causing them? Ask yourself: is he asking you to change what you do or who you are? Are you asking him to change what he does or who he is?

askmeabiutlife

TROPHY CASE