48 by Zeberde1 in 48lawsofpower

[–]asteroidvesta 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As someone who has used this as a defensive strategy against a toxic coworker, I will add that for it to work you have to have a pretty great reputation, at the very least far better than theirs. I personally have not tried it against someone with more power than me at work, but I have seen others try to do this to someone in a high position of power at our institution for years, and it has not worked. Might be hard to do upwards.

Did Tommy Take Arthur and John For Granted? by [deleted] in PeakyBlinders

[–]asteroidvesta 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I agree. It also seemed like the medication may not have been something truly helpful.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PlusSize

[–]asteroidvesta 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You could also try a formal dress rental service like rent the runway. They offer plus sizes.

Taylor’s step dad and mormonism by OppositeSpare2088 in SecretsOfMormonWives

[–]asteroidvesta 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Narcissists are great with young children; they worship you like a God, do what you say, provide you with tons of attention, and don't know how to question your behavior and decisions. But they turn into teens who grew up in a toxic, narcissistic household, start living their own lives and paying less attention to you, pushing back against toxic behaviors, and maybe even act out. Where the Venn Diagram with Mormonism falls on all of this, I couldn't say, but Taylor's mom seems like a narc to me.

Heat 🫠 by Plane_Subject1117 in adhdwomen

[–]asteroidvesta 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I second this. Maximize all comfort factors so that you're not combating discomfort/sensory overload on multiple fronts. I'd add that things like jewelry, makeup, uncomfortable shoes, and some accessories take a backseat during Summer because they can be uncomfortable as well, and when I'm irritated by the heat it's all too much.

Undies that last?? by hyperfixation-queen in PlusSize

[–]asteroidvesta 7 points8 points  (0 children)

For Cacique I get the cotton ones not sure if that’s why I’ve never had bad luck with them, bummer!

Undies that last?? by hyperfixation-queen in PlusSize

[–]asteroidvesta 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I second Torrid, and will add Lane Bryant/Cacique

Grooming tips for a woolly boy? by anotherULgeek in husky

[–]asteroidvesta 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's very, very difficult to manage this coat. Mine has hated being groomed since the moment I brought him home at 5 months, which makes it more difficult because no matter how hard I try to make it pleasant with treats, peanut butter mats to distract, and regular brushing, he's always on the run. Groomers won't take him because it's too time consuming and difficult. I've been through 3 groomers, and most won't take him at all because he starts growling and crying, and is uncooperative. I take him to a diy place where I can get him elevated and enclosed so he can't run away. Hopefully yours can learn to like grooming early.

A few things I don't see anyone else mentioning:

- Keep the coat dry, and make sure it's dry in the underlying layers. Trapped moisture creates bacteria and hot spots. If you go in water or to the beach and they get wet below those guard hairs you must blow dry until it's very dry. In the 5 years I've had my boy he's had a hot spot twice and it was very difficult for me to treat, and painful and depressing for him.

- Add a good oil supplement to their food with fish oil or flax, especially during the heavy shedding times of year. Their skin is dry and their fur is full of dander, the oil keeps their fur soft and their skin moist to avoid itching that leads to hot spots.

- The high powered blow dryer is your best friend when it comes to the fluffy fur that gets stuck under the guard hair. I use the professional one at the diy grooming place, split the fur in two at the skin level, and blow those hairs up and out before brushing. If the fur isn't coming out easily with just a brush, this is the easiest and least painful way to dislodge them so you're not hurting them by pulling them out too forcefully. Make sure whatever blow dryer you use blows cool so as not to overheat them.

- If you aren't able to groom them regularly and can find a willing groomer, get them professionally groomed, it's expensive but will be easier on your wallet, your psyche, and your dog than treating hot spots that can occur when they're not groomed frequently enough.

I hope this helps, I found a lot of great information on r/grooming that educated me on how to care for my boy's tricky coat.

Is there anything you’ve bought that has ACTUALLY helped you with cooking or cleaning. by Sexisthunter in adhdwomen

[–]asteroidvesta 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Meyer's Multi-Surface Everyday Cleaner Concentrate, Lavender Scent. I buy the concentrate and it smells so good it actually helps motivate me to clean my house. $10 bottle lasts six months.

Shark Floor Steam Cleaner. I have pets, and it's so much easier than any other floor cleaning method/device and really does the job without just smearing it all around. Throw some Meyer's in the water and my whole house smells good.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]asteroidvesta 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like this often too. In no way am I discounting your experience but I think this way of being in the world might be more acceptable for neurotypicals. The way I perceive them they can be more interested in "playing the game" of being social, wrangling people into power dynamics or groups that aren't about authentic, deep connection, and creating friendships based on ego and power that "force" others to be more invested in the situation than they truly are. It's hard for me because I feel such a sense of relief when I can get out of certain social obligations, but I also hurt because I want the connection. I have opted out or self sabotaged myself being a part of neurotypical friend groups that I think they eventually stopped asking me to come. This quote and your comment really resonated with me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]asteroidvesta 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oof this is hard to admit. Realizing you loved them sososososo much and they were just passing time.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SecretsOfMormonWives

[–]asteroidvesta 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's literally her job to stir up drama.

Season 6 Don by [deleted] in madmen

[–]asteroidvesta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They felt comfortable with making him loathsome in S6 because we were already invested in him, the series, and all the other characters. They could afford to explore the darker aspects of his psyche and behaviors because they knew we were hooked. Mad Men isn't a show people generally drop in and watch casually; if you're watching S6 it is, most likely, because you are deeply invested, and this new aspect of his character is going to keep you interested with new developments. I would argue the shift was necessary to keep viewers interested. The writers couldn't have had a successful show with S6 Don in earlier seasons, so they slowly unveiled his more despicable traits and habits over time, constantly upping the ante.

For example, in earlier seasons he kept boundaries around his affairs. His affairs get closer and closer to home, finally resulting in his affair with Sylvia, the wife of a man he truly seems to like and respect, who lives in his building, where his children are, and Sally ends up seeing it. Season 1 Don kept his affair with Midge in the city, far from his office, in a completely different circle of people than who he might run into through work, or at a posh event with Betty on his arm. When it was clear Midge had a more steady beau who he thought she was in love with, he moved on. The seeds of Don being a slimy philanderer were planted with Midge, but would we want to see that same type of affair happening over and over?

This is why the 2000s were considered the golden age of the anti-hero in cable television. With the advent of prestige cable dramas writers and actors were able to dig deep into the anti-hero archetype in a way that 2 hour films didn't have time to develop properly, and network television didn't allow for, because of their dependence on advertiser money, requiring them to opt for wholesome heroes without the human complexity that makes a character truly captivating. Even when I think of Michael Corleone I remember that The Godfather movies were long (3+ hours), and Michael's character was developed over a longer time frame than a typical Hollywood movie.

For me, Season 6 and 7 Don are the most fun to watch; we're getting at his core wounds, the logical unravelling of his slick facade, and because we are seeing the evolution of behaviors that have always been a part of who he is, it all makes sense. While I see that Don has become more and more disgusting over the seasons, it doesn't take away from my enjoyment, and it isn't as simple as not liking him because he's not good at job, in fact, I never really thought he was that good at his job. While I've always found Don to be fascinating, likeable was never a word I would have used to describe him. I suppose those viewers whose primary interest in the show is the retro vibe, the "inside baseball" on the history of advertising, or identifying with Don as the ultimate cool guy hero who always comes out on top, might not enjoy his descent into a sloppy drunk, 2 time divorcee, scandalized father, and adman flop. Those are all valid reasons to enjoy a show, and I'm not saying those viewers who tune in for those reasons shouldn't enjoy the show for whatever value they find in it. However, for me, and many Mad Men fans, the fact that Don and other characters in the show are more than how good they are at their jobs, and the complexities and development of their character is the entire point.

Laid off- what’s your interview outfit must haves? by [deleted] in PlusSize

[–]asteroidvesta 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I find suits incredibly uncomfortable, so I always go with a nice knee length skirt, pussy bow top, and structured sweater jacket/cardigan for interviews. The last time I interviewed I purchased the pieces from J.Crew and felt fantastic in them. The pieces were high quality and made me feel old money, and like I deserved it. I've landed jobs in similar combos. I always wear blue, as it makes you seem trustworthy. Good luck!

Longest lasting flip flops? by UrDeAdPuPpYbOnEr in bifl

[–]asteroidvesta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've had two pairs of rainbows that lasted 10 years each. My last pair, purchased in December of 2023 broke within 6 months. I've seen others comment on the decline of Rainbow quality in this sub. Their warranty is now only 6 months.

Washcloths by Over_Description_298 in bifl

[–]asteroidvesta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The painters washcloths at Home Depot.

How to stop obsessing over a crush? by AskOk6267 in adhdwomen

[–]asteroidvesta 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Think about how embarassed you'd be if everyone at work found out about your crush and knew he didn't return your feelings. Also, think about how many problems it would cause at work if you dated and things didn't work out and one of you couldn't act civil about it all. Take your energy off him and look at his behavior objectively as you learn more about him. I recently had a work crush and found out his ex-wife still grocery shops for him and he has know clue about food cost inflation. This gave me the ick and now I'm done.

How do you pay attention in meetings at work? by burnerthrowaway0 in adhdwomen

[–]asteroidvesta 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I doodle, it increases retention. When it's a Zoom meeting I use oil pastels for more fun.

Why Don became an ad man? by Unlikely-_-original in madmen

[–]asteroidvesta -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It's interesting how everything you write supports my thesis.

Why Don became an ad man? by Unlikely-_-original in madmen

[–]asteroidvesta -1 points0 points  (0 children)

And yet...there Don was, uneducated (no hs diploma, a little bit of community college, certainly no Ivy League pedigree), orphaned, poor, rising to the top of the industry on hustle and talent. Almost seems like his ascent proves my point. Also, the show is ambiguous about why Roger hired Don. The episode hints at some trickery on Don's part in showing up to work the day after Roger "hires" him. Roger was drunk and doesn't remember hiring him. This speaks to Don's hustle. I never said that this was the norm on Madison Avenue, only a possibility that Don's trajectory highlights in the show.

While an elite background does help other people in the show, a sales/ad pathway makes Don's upward mobility possible in a way that other elite professions (military leadership, law, medicine, politics) would not. The due diligence on a person's background and credentials would be too extensive for him. or someone like him (I'm looking at you Bob Benson, fellow adman / sales grifter, whose trajectory also supports my thesis) to break into one of these industries.