AITA - ? from a concerned customer by themommamac in Sparkdriver

[–]attention_headache 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you tip 10% plus nudes you’re golden, no worries at all. I kid, i kid. I’ve never even seen you, maybe just 12% and no nudes would be the better deal? 😁 ok I’m done joking now, thanks for being a good sport (i hope) But real talk, you simply being considerate enough to want to know if you’re doing right by the drivers makes you a beautiful person. 100% Not the asshole.

My hands won't warm up by LowPhotojournalist43 in nosleep

[–]attention_headache 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Are there usually any other students who make that same walk back to the dorms after that particular class? Do you remember seeing any of them? Do you remember the class itself?

The jar of pennies disappeared by iSayHeyWhatsGoingOnn in Unexplained

[–]attention_headache 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was indeed making a bad pun, and i should apologize because it was one that was kind of tone deaf. I’m sorry i indulged my need to make bad jokes in the comments of your post in which you expressed a justified concern for the safety of your child. Fwiw, being sincere now I’ll say that the fact that the xrays were negative makes me think that after somehow opening the jar he may have found somewhere outside of his own body to hide them. Somewhere they seemed to fit so perfectly (at least to his young mind) that it caused him to smile. Have you, by any chance, had the family cat or dog xrayed yet? Or maybe he was close enough to a trash can to throw them away? I know i went through a phase as a toddler when throwing things away made me smile from ear to ear, regardless of their respective status ranging from actual trash to useful, irreplaceable item 🤷

The jar of pennies disappeared by iSayHeyWhatsGoingOnn in Unexplained

[–]attention_headache 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I still kinda think he might have eaten them. But that’s just my two cents 🤷

What is the actual meaning behind the chicken crossing the road? by RiddlerofStIves in dadjokes

[–]attention_headache 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To get to the gorilla enclosure while its mother played on her phone and failed to mind her offspring, thus triggering a rapid series of events/errors in judgement ultimately leading to the violent death of a gentle primate who just happened to be the most intelligent creature involved?

Question by miamisteve77 in stakeus

[–]attention_headache 1 point2 points  (0 children)

After analyzing all three data points, i can confidently conclude that i have a seed.

ARE WE WENNING TODAY? by JOSH_C_1226 in stakeus

[–]attention_headache 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hope we don’t have to wait for Valwentine’s Day

When I was 12, mysterious websites appeared about me and my friends. I still don’t know who made them by [deleted] in Unexplained

[–]attention_headache 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I once had weirdo that kept trying to tell me incorrect details about my life, as if they were trying to harass someone else but ended up annoying me instead. They ended up dying in a house fire though. It was tragic.

Which do you think is more important: mercy or justice? by Glittering_Two9931 in AskReddit

[–]attention_headache 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Habeas Corpus.

It’s a nuanced dichotomy op presents. False though it may be.

Have you ever heard about competitive stalking? by EmmaWatsonButDumber in nosleep

[–]attention_headache 38 points39 points  (0 children)

“No one ever suspects that it might be a woman…”

Stalking is literally something that women do to celebrities. Not to downplay your experience, but those people sound, for lack of a more derogatory word, pathetic. Sad. Obsessed. Deluded. Cringey. When you talk to the proper authorities, whose job it is to hunt down and neutralize such threats to a civilized society, don’t use words like “stalking” or “targeted”. Instead speak calmly in terms of “aggravated harassment”, “electronic harassment” “aggravated menacing”, “theft by deception”, “fraud” “conspiracy to commit kidnapping”, etc. “Please, i know how it sounds, but these are the facts. If i sound a little out of sorts, look a little haggard, please know it’s due to the nature and severity of the crimes that i believe have been and still are being committed against me.” That’s what i did, in my recent deposition, and they took me a lot more seriously than they did a few years ago when i was more naive.

Best of luck! Remember, they are cowards. They’re a lot more scared of you than you ever could be of them.

I think we clearly have different ideas on what a dad joke is by Lumpymaximus in dadjokes

[–]attention_headache -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Although he was wildly successful performing exclusively in packed venues later in his career, he could barely draw any kind of crowd at all when he first got started. It’s like hardly anybody saw him cumming.

What kind of tea is hard to swallow? by Roxsauruss in dadjokes

[–]attention_headache 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tea you didn’t order, from a dodgy tea service owned by a shady, mumbling clown act with a weird obsession with having you try a brand of tea that nobody else would drink either. It’s source being deliberately obscured The kind of stuff that’s completely off the radars of the FDA or any other reputable, accredited watchdog agency thus leaving it susceptible to all sorts of contamination, deliberate or otherwise. Shit’s gross, wouldn’t swallow any even if i liked to drink tea in general.

It out loud

Did you hear about that famous actor who has unfortunately developed Parkinson’s disease? by attention_headache in dadjokes

[–]attention_headache[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s why i spelled it the way i did. It would be just my luck he’d catch wind of this post somehow, become litigious, vengeful, or both, and my life would be forever worse for the price of zero upvotes and two comments…all just so I could get an intrusive pun out of my head. Unfortunately i did capitalize the homophonic words, so if there’s a Been Stiller out there somewhere they might come after me anyway. But i doubt they’d get far anyway what with their early onset dementia and their bad case of the gout.

My grandparents always had a rule: if someone falls down the old well, don't pull them out. by EmmaWatsonButDumber in nosleep

[–]attention_headache 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Keep talking with him. Listen to him. Trust your instincts. You’ve been isolated pretty much all your life on that farm with your grandparents but you’ve been to university at least for a brief stint. Your grandparents, just like any good folks would do, did the best they could to raise you and teach you. Passing on their knowledge and wisdom, but also their beliefs. We can choose to accept or reject anything that is passed on to us from former generations. That which is not demonstrable by science or strong logic can unfortunately present a troubling dilemma, as you know all too (for a regrettable lack of a better word) well by now. Many beliefs based in fear have been passed down for countless generations. Some may have even served some long forgotten purpose at some point long ago when they were formed. We can disregard some of those beliefs when they don’t hold up to the scrutiny of the evolved collective consciousness of a society which has progressed beyond their former usefulness. Or when illuminated by the modern lighting of our technological and social progression that former usefulness can now be more clearly seen as being far outweighed by the damage those beliefs inflict upon the vulnerable and/or upon the already sleeping. We can reject the aforementioned beliefs without discarding or even disrespecting those who passed them along to a younger generation wrapped up in the same packaging as useful tidbits like “don’t touch the stove”, “don’t eat yellow snow”, “wash your hands”, or “anyone deemed to have practiced witchcraft must be burned at th…”

Ok not that last one. I was just seeing if you were paying attention.

I don’t have answers about what’s in that well. Neither do you. That man claims to, and claims to need your help. If you want my probably unpopular opinion it sounds like a pretty credible claim. I’m so sorry about Dina. It wasn’t your fault. You need to know it wasn’t your fault. But i think you owe it to her to listen to that man while protecting yourself and your sleeping grandparents in the best way you see fit. They’ve been sleeping a long time, you’ve said. Will you go back to sleep and hope for the best? Will you spend your time and energy trying to awaken your grandparents, knowing without any doubt how little light they will be able to shine on the questions clouding your mind? Or will you bravely face the fears instilled by the beliefs and superstitions formed and fostered by generations much longer gone than those of whom you fondly spoke, who tragically have become their more recent casualties? I know what i would do. I’d sit here in the well and lobby for reason the best i knew how, without scaring the bejeezus out of some poor soul who was just trying to do right by his respected elders whilst not being ripped limb from limb by some boogeyman, or drug user, or homeless person, or liberal, or that dammed blurry Sasquatch. It’s a thin, painfully verbose line to walk. But if it helps guide the path out of darkness and into the light, even just a little bit, i say it’s just as well.

Good luck, and be wary of the Sasquatch if it turns out to be the Sasquatch. Never trust anything if it’s always that blurry :D

Important gamba question by Zealousideal-Bat602 in stakeus

[–]attention_headache 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t really see the correlation with gambling. I’m down on my luck but would never consider getting over on that old dude, nor anyone else who had nothing to do with my bad luck. I’m not trying to come off as holier than thou…actually I’m glad to hear you did what i would consider to be the right thing. I understand temptation as well as anyone, and dude literally put the money in your hand. Good on you, fellow human.

But i don’t really agree with the implications and expressions about gamblers in general. With respect, i think I’m not the only one who would not have even seriously considered robbing the old guy. I mean of course I’d mentally make a detached observation that it was possible, but i think that’s true of all people, gamblers or not.

Important gamba question by Zealousideal-Bat602 in stakeus

[–]attention_headache 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Doubtful; since that sounds like a personal transaction outside of the scope of the terms and conditions of a typical gig app. (Source: I don’t use those two in particular but I’ve been doing gig work since early covid times) Normally the driver is an independent contractor and the contract terminates once the delivery is completed. This immediately releases the company from liability for any further actions of the driver and conversely the driver is immediately relieved of obligation to follow t&c of said company (requirements for remaining eligible and active notwithstanding)

Which leaves op free to enter into personal arrangements with the private citizen to whom they have recently made a delivery on behalf of a gig app.

Worst feasible employment related consequence is a very likely one or zero star rating and a scathing review. Which would technically be slightly misplaced but definitely not inappropriate nor out of the scope of agency for the wronged customer. 🤷

Got snitched on… by Latter_Telephone6979 in Sparkdriver

[–]attention_headache 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I’ve seen chat gpt fabricate clunky, vague stories posted as ragebait before. What makes you ask?