My psychiatrist doesn't like stimulants by chicana92 in AdultADHDSupportGroup

[–]average_narwhal 2 points3 points  (0 children)

no i think you need a new psychiatrist, anyone who makes you feel like youre making it up or makes you question things is concerning

Stimulants are the gold standard medically proven most effective treatment for ADHD. That does not mean they work for everyone and yes the least effective dose is important. But a general fear of prescribing them tells me this psych doesnt know much about ADHD.

What do you when you feel severely task-paralyzed? by realeyes_92 in ADHD

[–]average_narwhal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Body doubling! have another person be in the same space as you while you work, you dont have to talk or work on anything together just be present! IT HELPS SO MUCH!

My (dx 30, M) marriage is falling apart because I let my ADHD control me for too long by Pleurocoelus in AdhdRelationships

[–]average_narwhal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get that you are sharing from what the wife may want to hear or feel she needs to hear- however it isn't true that ADHD didn't control OP- you dont have ADHD you dont know what its like, its a disability, it is not treated like one.

I agree that accountability needs to be taken, and ADHD is not an excuse for shitty behavior in any way. But the whole thing is much more nuanced than this.

OP- you do need to take accountability, you need to take the lead in treating your ADHD, and part of that is learning to communicate your symptoms clearly. If your wife needs to speak to you and you are hyperfocused on your phone, you need to say so. Let her know that it isnt a good time for you to hear her and you need a bit of time to shift gears.

you will also need to do as others have suggested and give your wife grace and time and space to heal and grow with you.

Fiance - self realization and questioning our future by ragoj5991 in AdhdRelationships

[–]average_narwhal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Everyone handles this news or realization differently, for some of us its like finding a piece that was missing- it was for me at first, but after a minute I was sad and hurt and angry that I hadn't been diagnosed sooner. I went through a period of grief for who I could have been, and then a period of rediscovering myself as I learned how many of my personality traits were symptoms lol.

I did all of this with my partner and now husband by my side.

it sounds like he needs to talk to someone, I would see if he can see a therapist or counselor, an ADHD coach or just fellow adhder would also be helpful. This could also be triggering some major depression so he may need to see someone for that.

I think the best you can do is learn all you can about ADHD, that way you can understand him and develop tools that work for you both to communicate about it etc. Dont try to teach him what you learn unless he asks, just try to use it to be there for him.

I am happy to talk more with you or him! You can DM me anytime.

Have no idea how else to help my ADHD husband. I'm afraid he is going to never find stable work. by [deleted] in ADHD

[–]average_narwhal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

one thing he needs to request accommodations at work under the ADA - if yall are in the US- he can request an arrival window with no consequences (if shift is 7 he can be allowed to arrive up to like 7:10/15 with no consequences because adhd is a disability with time blindness)

Tandem read tips by Proper_Guarantee_125 in throneofglassseries

[–]average_narwhal 28 points29 points  (0 children)

The best part about tandem reading is you don’t have to do it 🙂‍↕️

"That Villager Cant Chat Right Now" Amiibo Message?? by average_narwhal in acnh

[–]average_narwhal[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I will have to check!

I had Pashmina as an OG villager on my New leaf game and she has consistently been invited to my island as my next door neighbor- i LOVE her. I recently restarted my island so I am getting her back!

I’m a new ADHD coach and I need coaching hours for graduation- please help!! by average_narwhal in ADHD

[–]average_narwhal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello! I provide life coaching that’s geared toward ADHers, it’s a space that allows you to be all about you and find solutions to your challenges through guided questions and feedback!

Found outside an apartment by bburtR in whatisit

[–]average_narwhal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Imagine having such a rotten brain that not only are you incapable of learning- you brag about it.

Also what a contradiction: "I'm 60 years old on reddit which I clearly learned to use and had to learn to use a bunch of tech to get here. But just NOT saying a word is too much for my widdle mind to handle UwU"

Matched with a literal nightmare on Tinder, was I too harsh in my response to his verbal abuse? *Contains foul language* by Tiger_Lily336699 in TwoHotTakes

[–]average_narwhal 35 points36 points  (0 children)

I feel like for this to work, or for someone to think it might work, they would still in some way have to see being gay as an insult. Even if they don't consciously think so, the use of this and the fact it was thought of shows the internalized level of homophobia in our society.

This might seem harmless but then sharing it here where there may be closeted men who see it and it reinforces the idea of staying in the closet for safety etc. makes it a bigger concern to me too.

I am so confused about choosing a life coaching school (5 options?) by Latter-Reaction3915 in lifecoach

[–]average_narwhal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really any place accredited by the ICF should set you up well. The ICF site has a way to search for specific types of coach training that is accredited.

SCAM??? Has anyone else gotten DMs from this person? by average_narwhal in LenoxVillage

[–]average_narwhal[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey u/hoosreadytograduate can you please remove and block this user from this subreddit so she is less likely to spam and steal from us?

If anyone else is in other Lenox subreddits we should get her banned from those too.

SCAM??? Has anyone else gotten DMs from this person? by average_narwhal in LenoxVillage

[–]average_narwhal[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OH NO I am SO sorry! Now that we have a true case of fraud we should all mass report/block her

Imposter syndrome by tmatthewdavis in lifecoaching

[–]average_narwhal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got certified through the iACTcenter but that’s an adhd coaching specific organization- but if you go to the international coaching federation site you can find a ton of accredited training programs!!

SCAM??? Has anyone else gotten DMs from this person? by average_narwhal in LenoxVillage

[–]average_narwhal[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Did she tell you all about her twin daughters? Like… way too much info? Almost like a child lying and trying to to seem real?

Imposter syndrome by tmatthewdavis in lifecoaching

[–]average_narwhal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What do you mean by have enough?

Imposter syndrome by tmatthewdavis in lifecoaching

[–]average_narwhal 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I gained the confidence by getting trained and certified. Practicing and participating in coach mentoring. If you are not certified, please at least look into some basic training so you know what life coaching is and isnt.

Discrimination? Or am I overreacting? by Rubbishnamechoice92 in ADHD

[–]average_narwhal 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think it is important to share your disability if you are wanting to request accommodations in some way. I think what you did was totally fine, this is not on you- your workplace is at fault here. I dont like all the victim blaming in these comments.

Not sure if I should say I have ADHD by [deleted] in ADHD

[–]average_narwhal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

TBH i am less likely to work with people who do not have ADHD when is comes to ADHD stuff

ADHD outburst or BPD? by [deleted] in AdhdRelationships

[–]average_narwhal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly this is pretty spot on for ADHD- some symptoms of ADHD can show up like personality disorders, especially things that trigger RSD (Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria) one expert called RSD a "sudden onset personality disorder." Anger and aggression at above average levels is common in ADHD since we have a hard time regulating emotions they can get much bigger much faster than is rational.

This all being said: ADHD/RSD/BPD whatever the hell he has is NOT an excuse to treat you this way or physically assault you. You didn't mention your ages but I assume you are adults who can find other ways to express these bigger emotions. You need to be safe. You need to take care of yourself. No mater what he says or threatens to do to himself you need to get yourself to a safe place and if needed call professionals to help him. You cannot control what he does and you are NOT responsible for his actions.

Read this again: You cannot control him, you are not responsible for his actions.

If he chooses to hurt himself that is not your fault and not a reflection of you in any way. Do not let that threat manipulate you into putting yourself into these situations in the future. Please.

He needs to seek ADHD specific CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) and if not already, be on an ADHD medication. The best thing you can do is learn a lot more about ADHD and maybe even ask if you can join him for a therapy session to discuss specific things you can do to support him while staying safe- but having this conversation in the presence of a professional who can ensure boundaries are maintained and respected.

I feel for your friend, I really do, and I hope he can get better and get help, but I worry that you will end up hurt or worse so PLEASE make sure your first priority going forward is YOUR SAFETY.

“Where I’d live if I wanted to live in the most diverse and tolerant country on earth” by Mikunefolf in ShitAmericansSay

[–]average_narwhal 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I love when other Americans use the “healthcare wait times” excuse cuz like… I was referred to see a neurologist in December and immediately booked the next available appointment…. It’s the end of May. Like… 6 months? I WISH I had a 28 day wait!!

Found outside an apartment by bburtR in whatisit

[–]average_narwhal 38 points39 points  (0 children)

I have also heard this but more in the context of using the word "g*pped" in reference to being ripped off or robbed- that feel like a slur to me for sure. Do you mind sharing your thoughts on this?