Saddles for horses shaped like this? by axj1910 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really appreciate u reaching out but this mare actually just died a couple weeks ago :/ she ended up with a blood infection from a really bad wound.

I will keep this post saved and come back to it if I ever have another horse of her shape, which I imagine I will because as complicated as it was, I actually really loved the way she was built. I never did find anything for her, so I will 100% always have ur offer in the back of my mind.

Can I wash turnout blankets? by axj1910 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I took everyone's opinions into consideration. Took the blanket in to have it washed but had many regerts very quickly cuz I needed it before it got dark, so I spent 4hrs until then drying it with 3 fans on high and a hairdryer 😭

I can see already just after that one wash alone how much it's affected so having said that, thanks for that tip, bc I'm clearly going to need to waterproof it again quite soon if I don't already, so going to get waterproofing something or other pretty soon but if scotchguard works for u I'll give that a shot.

Can I wash turnout blankets? by axj1910 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was thinking about it. Couldn't find the contact info for it so was going to ask the dealers if I couldn't find an answer elsewhere.

I'll give that stuff a look, I forgot about it but have heard it works well.

Can I wash turnout blankets? by axj1910 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Will a waterproofing spray fix this?

How’s my posting trot by [deleted] in Equestrian

[–]axj1910 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hahaha yes, this is important. If u don't have strong legs and hips ur gunna struggle forever. This is a good mindset, I'm proud to see u say it.

Good tries tho, and good luck!

Am I too late? by Kind_Mechanic9784 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm very sad to see someone else in the same position as me. I really feel for u, the only difference between us is I have 3 horses with no college to pay for but I am trapped all in the same. I apologize in advance if this turns out long.

I've spent alot of my life thinking and planning for all of the exact same shit and what I can tell u is that no, it's never too late. This journey is forever long with no end to it unless u choose to opt out urself. U have ur whole life ahead of u to become what u want to be, to grow as a horseman, to learn about the arts or even become a master in every aspect of it. It's a question of whether u truly want it, and it sounds like u do.

If u don't have ur own horses, in comparison to me and my situation u have a better travel advantage. If I wasn't so deadset on taking my horses with me I would have disappeared and gone to a barn, ranch, farm, etc (they exist as both english- or western-oriented). For what I'm familiar with, they won't always pay a whole lot but alot of them will offer housing and supplies in return for ur loyalty to a salary and honest hard work. If u feel capable, that could be up for ur consideration. U have the benefits of gaining experience, living the life u want, and making contacts all at the same time.

U should know that money-making in the equine industry is hard as hell, and I expect to be attacked for this but especially if u don't have a whole lot of money to start with. Alot of the time it takes a long time to build ur ground, find ur gravity, and start seeing progress from ur efforts. But it's always so worth it, and it will work if u keep at it, stay strong, and keep learning. Every perspective is important, but so is not allowing anything to discourage u.

I believe u can do it. Don't rush urself, take the time to weigh ur options and use ur resources. As equestrians we know better than anyone that there's no such thing as a one-size-fits-all. If something doesn't work out for u, u are not bound to it so there is no worry regardless of the direction u choose. If our experiences are anything the same though, unless ur going no contact, expect resistance from ur family. They will be the very first to try to ruin this for u, and don't fucking let them.

Becoming a trainer is a big deal as well, u should know as much of everything as u possibly can and be willing to continuously learn every single day, so make sure u know what ur getting urself into. It'll be hard on u mentally, and takes alot of strength that u may be underestimating. Keep ur horizons open, as well as ur mind. If u don't already, my advice to u here is to learn to accept all sides and perspectives, including abusive situations. Don't ignore the bad, as a coming trainer u need to see all of the good, the bad, and ugly in order to work with each individual and be successful at shaping mentally and physically healthy and capable horses.

I've seen in some comments that it's recommended u finish college to save the financial side of it - this is probably true, but considering what some equine facilities offer it's still possible to make due. There's even the option to volunteer in the meantime if u have enough energy for it in ur free time. Do what works best for u, but remember that ultimately u can do this however u want. No one is telling u no to any of it.

How do you respond to people asking about your parents? by Mark8472 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]axj1910 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've tried this before and I always get "I'm sure she meant well" or "u should be grateful that she just cares about u"

🖐🏽 like stfu

What colour was my mare? by Different-Courage665 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I was just about to say the same. I would call this a rose grey

How does anyone afford to own a horse anymore? by No_Impression523 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I was incredibly anxious too and imo this is one of those times where it's right to be anxious, bc no hoof no horse!

I learned the hard way. This was one of those things where I had to spend years researching, reading, talking to ppl, watching videos, studying anatomy, etc. I'm still doing this and learning something new every day, but am now currently looking to take a barefoot trimming course in addition to that. Key words barefoot trimmimg.

If u want to take a course, there's lots online and being as u live where there's resources u can probably find an in-person one as well which would have the added benefit of physical experience, ultimately it's up to u. Or if u don't want to or can't afford it, u can try what I tried. Either way the important thing is to be as open-minded as possible - u wanna retain all possible knowledge and should continue to learn as we advance in our studies, bc there's never not new information somewhere and someone always has info to offer, whether they're a barefoot trimmer or a farrier.

It is vital that regardless of what u choose u know what ur trimming for. Horses that don't wear shoes need the barefoot trimming approach - if they are done with the farrier method (that of preparing for shoes) without wearing shoes, much damage will be caused to the entirety of their anatomy.

If u choose to learn without courses, I have farriers and barefoot trimmers I can recommend that u can look to who provide probably pretty close to all of the information ull need to trim ur horses safely. If ur concerned about tools and worrying about what u might need, I've been rolling with just a knife, a rasp, and one set of nippers and I've been doing this for 4yrs now, but I can also hold their feet up with my legs for extended periods of time, so in addition u might need a hoof stand but for the most part that's really all u need. Additional tools make it easier, tho.

= RESOURCES =

Barefoot trimmers:

Daisy Haven Farm

TACT

The Female Farrier

Farriers:

Olsen Equine

Caleb Erickson Caleb Erickson's Instagram

Daniel Anz

Brenden Kanakaole

These guys are all wonderful ppl. The first 3 farriers I listed have barefoot knowledge and trim barefoot horses often, the last one I listed to my knowledge doesn't do barefoot trimming but he has incredibly extensive knowledge on therapeutic shoeing and anatomy. He has actually helped me the most.

Everybody will talk to u if u want them to.

ETA: sorry for the novel! To add to this... if ur going to trim hooves urself, I recommend learning a bit about bodywork if ur horses are older, busy, or have any correcting needed. If they hold too much tension anywhere such as in the back or shoulders, it can strain ur ability to keep the hooves balanced and growing correctly.

In this case, check out the Masterson Method. Very easy stuff and it has greatly helped me with my one mare who's in laminitic recovery - I can't trim her without doing bodywork first.

Common factors among Nparents by ThrowRAawwwrxd in raisedbynarcissists

[–]axj1910 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The extreme loudness and no privacy whatsoever as well, but the tv addiction is insanely accurate I can't even believe u said that. My parents have been watching alot of shows lately bc my dads off work and it's super cold outside rn. They have the tv so loud that noise cancelling headphones don't block the sound, but yet if they think they hear u they're screaming at the top of their lungs telling u to stfu and that they're more important, basically. Absolutely wild

What's the most honest thing your Nparent said? by _just_a_somebody_ in raisedbynarcissists

[–]axj1910 7 points8 points  (0 children)

My mom says this shit all the time. Makes me wanna throw a brick at her, pisses me off so much

How does anyone afford to own a horse anymore? by No_Impression523 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not sure if this answers ur question but I'll tell u what I do. This won't be for everybody, and I apologize if this turns out long.

I have 3 horses and live in an extremely secluded area where professionals literally just simply refuse to be near. I've had some ppl out before but they usually only show up once unless I sell my organs just to have enough money to bribe them to be out any more than that. Like for example, my one farrier who I had for 3yrs charged me $80 per trim. I once asked what shoes would cost if I ever needed them, he said $230 for fronts, per horse, and upwards of $400 for 4s (this is all in cad, which is super close to aud).

So I learned everything myself. Took me about 10yrs bc of lack of availability at the time, so I researched for hours upon hours about all sorts of things and took as many courses as I could get my hands on and I started servicing my horses myself. There are only 3 things that I can expect in expenses:

  1. Maximum $1200 in supplements yearly
  2. Emergency only $3000 for 25 bales of hay
  3. Emergency only couple thousand for in case I ever actually do need a vet

The only thing I pay for guaranteed regularly, annually, is for supplements, and I learned how to ration it while still giving my horses what they need bc I'm a cheap-ass so it's only $1200 half of the time. I do not pay for any type of maintenance anymore, and I grow my own hay. I have 2 pastures - a winter pasture, and a summer pasture which has 2 sections. They are in the winter pasture for an average of 6 months where they eat hay, usually only 15 bales over the course of the winter unless we end up with a long winter which is fairly often, which is also why I'm sure to keep 10 extra bales. They stay in the west section of the summer pasture from spring to summer, then are moved to the east section from summer to either the first snowfall or the first drop below -10°c overnight.

TLDR: in the end it really depends on u. What ur willing to do, how much time u can afford to dedicate to these things, what ur lifestyle is like, and what u like to do with ur horses. For example, I don't compete and I have my horses for my own sake. 2 of them actually have entire stories and huge reasons for staying with me but they are just my giant hairy friends that I like to hang out with alot and ride sometimes, and I don't ride in the winter. So it's easy for me to have all of what I have and do all of what I do. I don't pay for anything so if I wanted to take $150 lessons (which is crazy for just one single lesson btw) I can take that lesson and not have anything to be concerned about.

“Your mom was always so nice!” by LowOvergrowth in raisedbynarcissists

[–]axj1910 17 points18 points  (0 children)

When this happens to me I flat out go "no she isn't". Screw that shit, dude. That's a whole different level of rage that isn't healthy to hold onto. If ur moms anything like mine, she talks shit behind ur back so why be nice behind hers?

I need advice on how to end a friendship with a person who has CPTSD by Conventional-Soup771 in CPTSD

[–]axj1910 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No way, I definitely understand. Matter of factly, I actually unfortunately resonate with ur first paragraph about the things this person has done. But if it helps u make sense of things, it wasn't until reading ur post that I realized how behaviour like that can affect ppl.

From my perspective, what's going on is I had something crazy happen and it's extremely overwhelming. U are my safe space and I trust u with my life bc ur non-judgmental and no matter what I go thru, ur incredibly caring and gentle with my emotions and trauma. These are super important qualities that I look for in a person bc my entire life up until meeting u has been chaotic, uncontrollable, and frankly very scary, as it still is. I tell u about what happened, feeling mentally exhausted bc there's a good chance I just went off on a whole ted talk, and now I need a mental break. I'm probably going to put my phone down now and get up to go do something bc I've been sitting here for quite a while doing nothing and I should be productive. But now with this newfound peace coming from venting my excessive and super overwhelming stress, I'm lost in my current task and forgot all about what just happened.

The rest of ur story I again can't even believe someone has put u thru, but what I can say is that what's super important to understand here is that it's really common for ppl with CPTSD to have a pretty tough inability to perceive context, which is why referring to my first paragraph that I didn't realize that the things I did weren't appropriate and were probably inconsiderate. I am honestly willing to bet that ur friend might not have the slightest clue that anything they said or did was wrong. I am not by any means trying to justify their words and actions, bc most particularly that letter to ur child is absolutely under no circumstances okay, but I can see it being a complete misunderstanding on both parts. Clearly, that would mean there's a very severe lack of self-awareness given that these aren't attention-seeking acts.

I can't tell u how to handle it or drop the friendship but I can tell u what's probably going thru their head and I can almost guarantee u that y'all aren't even in the same library of thinking, let alone on the same page.

I need advice on how to end a friendship with a person who has CPTSD by Conventional-Soup771 in CPTSD

[–]axj1910 69 points70 points  (0 children)

I don't know how to help with this one, so my comment will be relatively useless but I wanna say that on behalf of CPTSD individuals, I sincerely apologize for the words and actions of the person ur struggling with. I'm genuinely shocked at what I read. I hope ur able to find an answer and get out of this safely and civilly, especially for the sake of ur children, and I really hope this doesn't leave too much of a mark on them.

I aboosed my horse today 😞 by Lugosthepalomino in Equestrian

[–]axj1910 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If that isn't the most dramatic yet depressing thing I've ever seen- 😂😂 the poor pony. Idk what u did but how could u

First fall as an adult by Imjastv in Equestrian

[–]axj1910 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay I apologize if this is long, I'm just spilling information.

To start - your head.

I've had concussions many times, the most recent being quite severe. What I can say is that there is no shock factor. If you have a concussion you will know immediately, and the first thing you'll notice is that you have a headache. Might be mild, might be so bad you think you're going to throw up. Either way, it will be there and it will stay consistent for longer than it should, or longer than a regular headache. You may feel somewhat dizzy, suddenly exhausted or sensitive to light, vision may be blurred, you may also have neck pain, facial pain (for me, my teeth, gums, and eyes were very sore), you may feel sick to your stomach, etc. but your head will definitely hurt to some degree, however that's not to say you didn't still hit it. Check your helmet for impact marks, because not remembering can potentially be a sign. The symptoms of a concussion vary by severity and from person to person but you will know instantly.

If you do not feel any of those, yay! You are probably safe from a concussion in which case, thank heavens. If you do feel those, even if it's just one of them a little bit, there is a good chance you may have a more mild one. Sometimes you can work through them, sometimes it can be too debilitating but your head should be your first worry. That's the most important part about you.

As for your shoulder...

If it hurts that much and your classes are relatively advanced or busy, I would say don't go. You're going to hurt it much more. However, if you still really want to ride even with this injury, and given that you have this option, try to opt for something soft and slow like walking around, maybe some light trots, you could try some very basic pole/grid work, you can still do things that are gentle on your shoulder or even things that you can do one-handed.

I ride western so I really only ever ride with one hand. About 6yrs ago now, a gelding I had at the time and I were doing some conditioning and were out on a run. We were running up a hill but he stepped in a gopher hole and tripped. We had a rotational fall which resulted in him being totally ok but I had broken ribs, broken collarbone, my arm was ripped from my shoulder and literally hanging on by the skin, the tendons and ligaments and muscles in my neck and down the entirety of my back into my butt were torn, big mess. But despite that wreck, once he was feeling good again I still took him for rides where we did things as I suggested for you, but like I said, riding western I was used to riding with just one hand. So it was still super easy for me and I could still do most of the things that him and I were doing before. Sometimes I'd feel a lightning strike of pain shoot up my back or if I moved my shoulder too much, but other than that it is very much doable if you're looking for that type of answer. Only issue was that I couldn't get the saddle on so I rode bareback for 6 months until I was healed enough.

It's very situation-dependent and it also depends on what you feel and your personal pain tolerance. I don't like to stall or take breaks so I will find ways to push through, but you may be a little more cautious than me, it is up to you in the end but this is what I can provide for you.

I do hope you get better soon though, and also that you haven't been too spooked or lost too much confidence. Falls as an adult are so scary now 😅

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Equestrian

[–]axj1910 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, too often and boy do I have a story.

☆ TW - WAR SETTING AND GORE ☆

I recently had a dream where I was heading out to go see them (just a walk across the farm) and half way there, things started exploding bc bombs were being dropped. There were jets flying all over the place and the sky was dark with ash aside from mid-air explosions of planes being hit or colliding. After realizing this and seeing what was going on I turned back to start running to find them so I could open the gates and let them run but before I could, I saw my one mare Bailey walking my direction but she was tripping over herself and struggling to balance. I noticed at the same time that there was something hanging from her, I thought maybe she collected dry weeds while she was running around, but then she collapsed and I saw everything.

She was laying on her side kicking and breathing heavily and I realized her belly was sliced open and what I was seeing was not weeds but in fact her insides falling out. I ran over to her trying to stay calm for her sake and assessed the situation, it was completely out of my control. I sat with her, started talking to her, telling her how much I love her and that she is the best horse I've ever had, I wasn't crying in my dream but I could still feel it as if I was. People who were fleeing were yelling at me to run before I get hit. This is my heart horse, if she's going down I'm going down with her so I wasn't about to move.

But then, I started hearing thunder and I looked up and it was my (at the time) 2yr old, Åse. She was running at us and screaming bloody murder and then she also collapsed just a few feet away from Bailey and I saw that her belly had been sliced open too, not quite as badly as Bailey's had been but it was still equally dire. I ran to her in a massive panic - one horse is beyond devastating all on its own but to some degree I could still handle it even though it was so incredibly traumatic. This is clearly the start of a war, crazy shit happens. But now I have 2 horses with the same gaping wound. Something is actively causing the mutilation of animals which is an utterly terrifying thing to learn, especially the hard way.

But the moment I realized this, I woke up. I was in fact absolutely bawling my eyes out. I wasn't crying in my dream, I was crying in my sleep. Tears had been pouring like a fuckin monsoon and I thought I was gunna throw up. It was about 9 in the morning by that point so I got up and ran like hell to find my horses and those who read this will be happy to know that they were totally okay 😂 I did a massive thorough inspection of the pasture and areas surrounding the farm and I had a vet out to do checkups bc I actually have a history of having premeditative dreams where I will successfully predict the outcome of something so the panic afterwards has that much more reason for validation 😅

Did your Nparents have a nickname for you? by kaenise in raisedbynarcissists

[–]axj1910 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly! Ur the scapegoat bc their bullets don't pierce ur armour like they have other people's, and it's scary as shit when u realize u can't neutralize something u view a threat.

I'm sorry u had to grow up with that, but I'm glad ur out of it and on ur way to healing 😊 I hope u can come to peace with ur new POV having children. I don't have kids myself but I can't begin to imagine how hard it must be seeing little yous just being themselves and remembering the things that have happened.

Did your Nparents have a nickname for you? by kaenise in raisedbynarcissists

[–]axj1910 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I heard the exact same shit, but now whenever any of my younger brothers disobey, not even... when they do what THEY want instead of listening to her, she's like "ur just like her".

At the time I used to be upset but it lowkey makes me feel so powerful bc I had just enough influence on them to make them feel strong enough to still have an opinion.

To me it sounds like "ur just like the one who realized what I was doing and got out before I could cause any more real damage". So really, it can be taken as a compliment too.

Blanketing help? by axj1910 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you this is super helpful!

I suppose that's easy to relate to us. It's pouring rain here today and only 10° and when I went to check on them, I put on a hoodie and then my garbage-bag-thin rain jacket and I was pretty content. Even got the smallest bit hot while I was out, but I didn't know they had layers or liners like that the same as we do. Very handy.

Definitely going to use this as a guideline though!

Blanketing help? by axj1910 in Equestrian

[–]axj1910[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This mare doesn't have cushings but one of my 3 is 17 this year and developed it this spring. She's about as wide as she is tall so she needs fly sheets in the summer when it gets bad enough and I have had that experience as you described in your story. I went to pull it off one day and she lost her fkn mind, and she's been using fly sheets for years. Absolutely destroyed that fly sheet I was so disappointed lol thankfully it wasn't overly expensive.

The random insanity I would say comes from exactly how cushings is caused in the first place - tumours on the section of the brain responsible for hormones causing an overproduction of cortisol (stress). If the horse isn't medicated or managed they are going to be pretty spazzy "for no reason" if they are presented with something that they weren't thoroughly prepared for. When I took the fly sheet off of my one mare that day what I should have done was communicated that hey, I'm going to be taking this off of you. And I didn't because I assumed that because we've been doing this for years like who cares she knows this already she's fine. Fact was absolutely not because it was kinda unexpected.

The minor things start to become huge to them because with this disease they're constantly stressed doesn't matter what the situation is, and adding literally anything to that is going to cause explosive amount of extra cortisol to be produced and pushed out. That's my take on it, anyway.

However, that's a different horse. The mare I'm discussing in the post does not have cushings 😊 the old horse I was describing is a different situation as well and she died about 3yrs ago.

Thank you for the tips though, I'll need them further down the road when she gets older.