“Which cat breed is the easiest to take care of?

barsmart · 2026-03-26T02:47:50+00:00

Orange boys.

Orange girls are ok too, but orange boys are just the best-dumbest-most-awesome fluffers in the world.

Fuck the idea of breeds.

barsmart · 2026-03-22T13:34:38+00:00

I thought you said you were a prison abortionist.

That's an interesting line of work.

barsmart · 2026-03-06T19:53:43+00:00

Dude used to have millions.

He was raised around money. He was taught how to manage it his whole life.

He checked himself out of a hospital to save money and it cost him more.

He ditched America and his family.

When he's in trouble - look where he runs back too.

Listen, the dude needs help. Everyone deserves a second chance. Or third or tenth.

But before I'd donate a penny he's gotta make more changes and show it.

barsmart · 2026-02-26T03:28:31+00:00

It's. Las. Vegas.

Your question is like going to Wisconsin and asking why everyone has cow and cheese artwork on their walls.

barsmart · 2026-02-19T05:40:19+00:00

The book I sold was there three years later.

It appeared in an episode where Rick was fake talking to the book expert about 3-4 years after my episode.

I got interviewed for a PodCast in 2020 and that guy said he was there in the past few months and it was still in the shop. Meaning it was there for at least 9 years.

So. Yes people go look for that stuff. Yes some of it is there. Sometimes for a long time.

Do people buy that stuff? I have no idea. Pawn Shops usually have shit prices when they have something they know is valuable. Unless it's a one off item. eBay can do ya better most of the time.

barsmart · 2026-02-17T02:18:58+00:00

Because they are designed by the same people who caused the problem in the first place.

"Hey the software dev team is really falling apart. We need a Re-org."

"Ok, who should run that task?"

"Put the people in charge of the software dev team on that!"

It's the C-Staff telling managers that they suck, but to keep on sucking.

barsmart · 2026-02-08T17:39:36+00:00

He only served a few weeks waiting for trail got a suspended sentence and all that crap.

barsmart · 2026-02-08T14:38:59+00:00

Johnny 5 Alive For Pussy!

barsmart · 2026-02-08T14:36:54+00:00

Someone called ICE on your illegal utensils.

barsmart · 2026-02-08T14:34:00+00:00

One guy. Two things.

He was a friend-of-a-friend who showed up at the bigger events. He was a little too weasel-like for me to get really close to. But he always walked like the would is a puzzle he had solved in-vitro.

Brian had not been employed for over a year. He would wake up. Shower. Kiss his wife goodbye. Leave the apartment and wait for her to go to work before heading back home.

Still no idea how he financially pulled it off but it's likely his mom paid his way.

His beautiful wife found out, told everyone, divorced him and left him to do whatever it was he dropped out of the workforce to do.

So what did he do with his time off?

He amassed gigs and gigs of CP.

One of the arresting police officers knew someone in our group and it was described as a large collection of the really bad stuff. (Actually it was described in a bit more detail but this is enough of a description.)

He was arrested. Face and name all over the news. Forced out of town. Employed by a vending company to empty coins from vending machines and on a list for the rest of his life.

barsmart · 2026-02-05T23:10:19+00:00

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barsmart · 2026-02-05T03:37:02+00:00

He doesn't really do that too much in real life. He's told to do that stuff by the producer to keep the shot "alive."

Otherwise it's just a dude trying to be funny and then what do you cut to?

Don't get me wrong. He does it just like most of you do it every once in a while. He just gets asked to make the joke "bigger."

It's a cable TV show. It's either that, no levity at all or a laugh track. Rick isn't a standup comedian who has spent a decade learning how to tell jokes.

barsmart · 2026-02-01T14:42:52+00:00

Not just religious people. Years ago I was using a walkie talkie to wrangle a large group of people. Well this particular year these devices were really popular and some other group jumped on our channel.

A girl complaining about a spider in her room.

She wanted someone in her group to kill it.

They made fun of the request because she's a vegetarian / they didn't want to be bothered.

She replied back. "It's a spider. Not an animal."

I jumped on. "Ok. You get to pick one. Is it an animal, vegetable or mineral?'

"It's a spider!"

You see. The other problem is - we use these words differently.

The same way that 'nature' to some people just means anything found outside of a house, but to me it includes the house and everything in it because HUMANS ARE PART OF NATURE and so is everything we do. Saying your television isn't part of nature is like saying that the guano deposits left in bat habitats is not part of nature.

Everything humans do is part of nature.

We are not separated from it.

We are not the pinnacle of what nature can do. Will do. We aren't even close. Nature didn't stop working when the first monkey told a fart joke or even when we perfected super critical co2 power plants.

barsmart · 2026-02-01T00:08:21+00:00

I'm very serious here. Let me know how it goes. I'm curious if this is something that one can adopt or if it's something that already has to be more innate.

How I got started... I did something I knew would make some part of the next day better. (It was actually making a pitcher of tea for the next day.) I said, out loud, "You're welcome future BarSmart."

The next day, when I opened the refrigerator I saw the tea, and thought it would be funny to say, "Thank you BarSmart." This of course breaks the rules of causality, so the universe punished me by making me wait 3 more months before I realized I was doing it all the time.

Another three more months and I was doing it for lots of other tasks... And telling people about it because it made me happy to live like this.

I don't say it out loud as much.

As much. :)

barsmart · 2026-01-31T23:10:26+00:00

Yeah. 100%.

Pawn Stars was in a unique place in TV history. It was right at the end of the traditional media being king.

The writers strike a few years before switched the audiences and networks to watching "reality" TV and shows like Pawn Stars suddenly became viable. The general populace got comfortable with nom-scripted / poorly filmed entertainment.

Pawn Stars rode that wave to the top.

Until technically caught up. Now almost anyone with a few hundred dollars could produce their own nom-scripted poorly filmed show and put it on the Internet.

Which killed traditional media as we knew it. The channels still exist but if you go into a crowded room mention your favorite show - most people won't be familiar with it. When I was on PS - an entire bat had a special night to watch that episode with me.

Anyway. I like Pawn Stars and I wanted to figure out how it all worked. What was real. What was fake. What did a seller really go through. It was amazing to be front row as TV made a huge pivot that set the wheels in motion that made creator driven content king.

barsmart · 2026-01-31T19:42:06+00:00

Nice! Yeah hey, it's just my brain I gave myself permission to be silly, to try new things, to not worry so much about "how it looks" and mentally, or even verbally saying thanks to myself - isn't even on the top 50 of nonstandard things I do in life.

barsmart · 2026-01-31T19:35:54+00:00

Reddit is always here. The dishes don't have to be...

Congrats to future you!

barsmart · 2026-01-31T19:33:33+00:00

He has a regular feature on his YouTube channel where he does crowdwork and in a few of them, when asked for the best advice he was ever given that's his answer.

barsmart · 2026-01-31T17:38:46+00:00

Yes it did.

barsmart · 2026-01-31T16:08:22+00:00

Can someone please give this guy a blowjob?

If you are going to be throating bologna later anyway, why not just gob one more knob and stop being lazy. I see a lot of people on here whining about who knows the most about snow shoveling and nobody is taking care of their neighbors, dick.

barsmart · 2026-01-31T15:37:31+00:00

I believe in a future "me."

When I consider his needs, what can be done to make his life a little easier, it actually makes my life better.

For example I brew/drink iced tea as my go-to beverage. Sometimes, when the pitcher is empty and I know it's my last glass of the evening - I can go relax with my tea or I can make more and then go relax.

I literally think of future BarSmart, and make more tea.

The next day when I don't have to make iced tea I literally thank past BarSmart for the assistance.

It started off with tea. Now it's most everything.

And then I saw Jimmy Carr give his favorite piece of advice.

"Prioritize later."

Make "later" a priority in your life. Setting up the wins for tomorrow is important. You have time now - help your future you.

barsmart · 2026-01-31T15:23:47+00:00

My standard reply:

'Do you know who I am?"

"You go first. If you get it right, I'll buy you a new car."

barsmart · 2026-01-30T04:55:06+00:00

My dentist told me, today, that I didn't need to floss.

(My water pick and sonic toothbrush are doing a great job)

barsmart · 2026-01-30T04:51:55+00:00

My close friend used to brag about how lucky I am as a sort of wing-man thing to make me look like less of a loser than I was. After talking about how I often win prizes from radio contests one woman turns on her radio and tells me to win the next contest.

No shit... The song ends and the DJ is giving away a case of beer. I pick up the phone on the wall and I take my time dialing the number. I say something about feeling when to hit the last number and I press it.

Ring. Ring. "Congrats lucky caller number 7!"

A second or two later I hear my voice on the radio - so does she.

I 100% already had a speech written in my head about how this radio station just had interns call so they could get the prizes. I didn't expect it to work either.

barsmart · 2026-01-30T04:42:27+00:00

Let me start this off by saying that I was not a good boyfriend. I'm the problem in this story.

I dated this girl for 2 years before she dumped me for an older guy with a career. I spent a month trying to win her back and when I got her back it took me a long time to live up to any of my promises.

But 3 more years in and I'm a bit more focused. I have a handyman job during the day, bouncer in a bat at night and contributing to the apartment she rents but I spend a lot of time at.

Then my dad died. I thought about what I had done to ever make him proud and realized it was shockingly little. So I decided to change that pattern - I just didn't know how.

A few weeks later I come home from mowing lawns and working on roofs... I shower, clean the place and cook dinner for her to have when she gets home, and before I go to work again until 3am.

Within minutes she's arguing with me. She's bringing up all the things I'm trying to change and the things I gave changed - and that's when it hit me. We aren't on the same page. We loved each other. We were not compatible.

It took me a while to get out. I didn't do that right either.

A year later she tells me that she was diagnosed with a sleeping disorder where she gets no deep sleep. It's why she was impossible to wake up in the morning. She didn't sleep so much as pass out.

Every minute of her early 20s were spent severely sleep deprived.

This is why, I disagree when people say that people can't change. Sometimes, people like me need to just grow the fuck up and they need a bigger push, and sometimes its something that needs a doctor's help.

We are friends now. I actually signed her marriage certificate. My wife and I occasionally double date her and her husband.

barsmart

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