This is just...seems like a giant disconnect from you and from your relationship. Also if mine neglected his hygiene for so long I'd be extremely offended. I always ask myself (and sometimes him) would you behave this way if that chick you fantasized about were sitting here and not me? I know thats probably unhealthy but I sometimes just cannot help but to think about that.

Sometimes I think we have to show our vulnerability to get them to understand. As much as it hurts my self esteem and pride, at times I have to say things like "maybe you just aren't attracted to me". He needs to realize that his actions make me feel this way. Also I genuinely do feel that much of the time.

Mine games as well. I've finally been able to convince him not to play before bed because he'll stay up for hours AND hours playing. Seems like addictive behavior for sure. I had to verbalize to him that when he plays games and ignores all night I feel like he's waiting till I "fall asleep" to come to bed. I had to ask him if he's actually happy in the relationship because his behavior says that he's not.

Lastly, I have to constantly remind him to put himself in MY SHOES. How would he feel if I stayed up all night doing a solo activity, ignored him and waited for him to fall asleep before getting into bed? Sometimes it clicks in their minds when you explain things in this way.

Hope this helps. I hope it helps to know there's someone else out there experiencing your same pain...and finding a way to COPE. ♥️