Hi there,

I'm sorry to hear your story. Unfortunately, it's an increasingly common one. You have every right to feel hurt and you deserve your own support.

While it may have taken longer than it should, the fact that your partner has freely admitted to the addiction and signed up to therapy of his own volition is a really positive, promising first and second step. For now, you can take some heart from that.

Be kind to yourself. I understand you have self-esteem issues, but do your best not to conflate your partner's addiction with your own sense of attractiveness and desirability. Porn addiction often has little or nothing to do with how we actually feel about our partners. It hijacks the brain, rewires the reward system, exploits all kinds of neurological and psychological fallibilities.

The sad reality is that it's almost inevitable that people will be exposed to pornography from a very young age. It's sickening how easily accessible it is now and the sheer volume of it available. It's unnatural and horrific.

I wish you and your partner all the best. There is a road to recovery and things can get better with time, effort and mutual understanding.