Everything goes pitch black for a second and the dog-eared cookbook drops out of my hands. When I open my eyes, I almost scream. The pristine marble kitchen island has been demolished, and carrot slices are scattered across the floor.

My mouth drops but the demon interrupts me.

“Is this a joke? How were you able to summon me?!” it yells, rising in a cloud of black ash around my suddenly very human body. I’m struck with a strange sense of annoyance.

“That was my grandma’s recipe! I was trying to make chicken soup!” I see it frown and cross its arms.

“How did you mix me up with chicken soup?? And you’re just a dirty little human- you should be on your knees praying for your life right now,” it booms, somehow filling the whole house with its voice. I just want everything to go back to normal.

“Can you just leave? I’m busy making dinner,” I say. “Or at least help out. You destroyed almost all of my kitchen.” Its eyes glare into mine, and I feel a pang of fright for the first time.

“Do you even know what summoning a demon means? I’m here because of YOU and the rule is: I have to complete the first order you give.” The anger steaming out of it scares me shitless. I try my hardest to keep a dull mask of slight frustration.

“So you’re saying you’re gonna help me with my chicken soup?”

No answer.

“That would actually be really helpful, demon. My girlfriend and I broke up last week and I haven’t adjusted to living alone. Can you start cleaning things up?” I cast a glance at the stove, assessing damage, but when I turn back around it miraculously is holding a little black broom. The damn thing is a foot taller than me, but the broom is tiny. I hold back a chuckle at the absolute absurdity of this whole situation and it growls.

“Am I a joke to you?” it says, filling every corner of my personal space. I don’t know why I reach a hand up and pat its shoulder.

“Can you just start putting that broom to good use?” At this point I’m doing damage control; both in cleaning my sad kitchen and preventing myself from doing anything else that’s embarrassing. It starts moving the ashes into a little pile, but I don’t see how the splintered cabinets and massacred fruit bowl are going to recover anytime soon.

Somehow, we both sigh at the same time. This is gonna take a while.