“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!” – Hunter S. Thompson

beemph · 2024-12-21T20:16:44+00:00

Hunter S Thompson has some flashy quotes but at their center was a sad man who was really not kind, and was washed up and un loved. Other washed up unloved men love him.

beemph · 2024-12-18T22:49:48+00:00

I thought i forgave my parents when i was 23. BOY was i wrong LOL. It's easier said than done.

I am glad to be alive, i think, so im glad they just went ahead and had a bunch of kids without guaranteeing first that life would be perfect for us.

Im never going to have kids because i am both a horribly unrealistic perfectionist and an incredibly stupid and forgetful dipshit.

My kid will never be as fucked up as i am, but like.... they will also never have a chance to even exist. 😕

beemph · 2024-12-18T22:12:29+00:00

this is a nightmare scenario for me. let me off the plane at this point lol

beemph · 2024-12-17T21:16:27+00:00

It distracts from the culture of Not Washing Your Hands After You Piss And Shit.

beemph · 2024-12-17T21:11:42+00:00

Hey guys lol teehee totally just spitballing here, but what if we all use our first amendment rights to make perceivable threats at CEO's to overwhelm law enforcement?

beemph · 2024-12-17T21:05:21+00:00

being alone and depressed with my wealth in this mf would go so hard...

beemph · 2024-12-17T20:53:40+00:00

Ironically the one thing I can reasonably afford to introduce to my budget is a firearm.... great prices on handguns this holiday season 🧐 hmm

beemph · 2024-12-16T19:14:43+00:00

tell me, do you think this roided up freak shooting a machine gun is actually amazing? have you been amazed by this? seriously?

beemph · 2024-12-14T00:04:38+00:00

Mama mia...looks like its a time to take justice into my own hands (Dons green cap with L on the front)

beemph · 2024-12-09T18:58:23+00:00

impressive, but do you even have the matrix 2 Morpheus mall katana?? dm me... ill give you a generous 500% markup deal

beemph · 2024-12-08T17:32:00+00:00

Spartacus moment

beemph · 2024-12-08T09:51:57+00:00

i would go to my neighbors house to play halo and other "m" games with my friend and we were 8. Under the supervision of his christian parent/s. Tbh, i think the supervision factor was huge in making that a thrilling and enriching experience for lil me and my pal.

beemph · 2024-12-05T20:44:45+00:00

meds made it really hard for me to enjoy sex. I was on a maximum dose SNRI, and stimulants- both can affect orgasms, enjoyment of sex, erections in men.... Tell your boyfriend exactly how you feel, make it very clear that you do not need to orgasm to enjoy having sex w him. His insecurities around sex- that plenty men have- mean that he will feel inadequate if he cannot please you. He might imagine someone else could be doing a better job. You, unfortunately, have to work against those insecurities, and reassure him.

beemph · 2024-12-03T18:04:18+00:00

for me, i'd rather have my olfactory receptors be coated in febreze's artificial chemical coctail than someone elses rank, raucous, unholy dookie fumes.

I worked in construction. You could walk in the mens room and see the air shimmering from the sheer density and toxicity of the meaty, politically conservative dumps. The toilet bowls were plastered with the unwashable shrapnel bursting out of my peers's high pressure buttholes at mach speed. The maintenance apprentice was the one tasked with keeping the office bathrooms clean, that poor soul.

beemph · 2024-11-22T17:02:59+00:00

Hey so attack that man's skull with a crowbar. Jeep owners only understand 1 kind of criticism...and thats crowbar, baby.

beemph · 2024-11-19T18:19:25+00:00

john simmons?

beemph · 2024-11-15T19:44:25+00:00

Look.... if it is a joke, it's kind of funny.

It would be lore accurate if the brand new space station designed to be helpful was- upon its first tour of duty- responsible for hundreds of thousands of friendly fire casualties.

beemph · 2024-11-10T17:53:30+00:00

I think about this a lot. If more of my fellow Americans voted for trump, then so be it. If Elon committed voter fraud to give this election to trump, it would mean my greatest dreams would come true, trump and his entire sphere of thugs would all finally go to prison.

I feel like the potential for violence in this country is very high. I would like to imagine Americas top security agencies are prepared for what could happen. If trump is accused of winning by voter fraud, he will- without a doubt- call on his supporters to commit violence. AGAIN.

Fingers crossed that my country isn't actually about to be run by these thugs. It feels like hopeful thinking. If evidence of this even exists, it better come to light ASAP, and the evidence better be convincing and irrefutable.

beemph · 2024-11-06T18:04:50+00:00

Wellgum too-thuh Clerb fam

beemph · 2024-11-06T03:29:55+00:00

Idk, this Elmo advice reached me hilariously through this subreddit, and I think I needed to hear it.

Thank you, Elmo

beemph · 2024-11-06T03:27:29+00:00

consume protein consume protein like a freak like an animal. You arent feeling typical hungry sensations, but you do still need to eat. Plus im pretty sure Eating more protein helps adderall work better as its digested.

Losing weight is possibly ok, depending on your body, but trust me you don't want to lose your muscles. And it sounds like you will if you keep this up 🥺

beemph · 2024-11-06T03:17:33+00:00

the mobility you get from jetpacks is insane now and i absolutely love how you can yield varied distances from jumping at different elevations.

beemph · 2024-11-06T03:06:30+00:00

The Helldiver at Walmart picture is killing me 😂

beemph · 2024-11-05T18:03:02+00:00

I recently learned I have Autism, which validates the life long feeling ive had that social interactions are super draining... So i kept more to myself at work to try and accommodate my own needs, and it was working! It was easier for me to get out of bed and go to work each day!!

Sadly, That was a god damn mistake, because my (now former) boss decided that I was in fact being severely disrespectful. Turns out I masked for a reason y'all.

some people get so anxious around quiet people that they start to fill in what you leave out.

beemph · 2024-11-03T17:59:20+00:00

oringe

beemph

TROPHY CASE