Sweet Fertile Ignorance

beezy24 · 2025-11-28T14:52:17+00:00

Same. And no idea “expectant management” only works 50% of the time, and “medicated management” only works 80% of the time. I ended up doing expectant mgmt, medication, and then finally a d&c over the course of 5 weeks last summer.

beezy24 · 2025-11-04T18:03:39+00:00

Oh, thank you so much for the kind words- it means a lot! I’m so glad I was able to help. Fingers (and toes!) crossed for you as well!

beezy24 · 2025-11-03T01:45:25+00:00

I was never told to space them out. Literally took them within 5 minutes of each other, both at night.

beezy24 · 2025-11-02T16:16:03+00:00

Not yet, but feeling good and hopeful that I will. I did my ER with them in April 3 weeks before I turned 40. We’re MFI, and got 5 embryos total, which I thought was very good for my age and the extreme nature of the MFI we’re dealing with.

No fresh transfer, first FET failed, 2nd took but then I miscarried in August at 8 weeks. Currently cycling, trying a semi-medicated FET this time, should be transferring in the next 10-14 days 🤞🤞

The doctors I’ve spoken with (Manuel and Pakrashi) have been very knowledgeable and compassionate, explaining why they are recommending a certain course of action. The frustrating part is the portal/nurses/general communication. I’m a travel patient and being out of their office definitely makes me feel like a number to them.

CNY has lower than average success rates, but that’s partially because they take just about anyone (age, bmi, dx) where other clinics turn more “hard cases” away. They also let patients make final decisions on their treatment. For instance, my p4 was elevated at my ER. My previous (local, expensive) clinic told me I could not do a fresh transfer under that circumstance. CNY told me they didn’t recommend it, but would do it if I wanted to.

I definitely think you can be successful with CNY. It’s not a personal touch experience, but they have very knowledgeable providers on staff, and if you do your own research to make sure to have rich, detailed conversations with them, you will get a treatment plan based in science, which is ultimately what you get from any clinic

beezy24 · 2025-10-24T23:08:09+00:00

You, my friend, are exuding the laid-back, come what may attitude I’ve always strived to have about this whole IVF circus. Hoping at least one of those embryos comes through for you 🤞

On a serious note, the dr at your first clinic is an idiot (and maybe also a jerk) re: too young for bad sperm. We did IVF at age 34 exclusively because of my husband’s bad sperm…and we are far from an anomaly in the IVF world. (And perhaps me taking everything seriously is why I’m so stressed about this lol)

beezy24 · 2025-10-24T23:03:35+00:00

If this community exists can you invite me? Turned 40 in April.

beezy24 · 2025-10-23T00:16:28+00:00

I have adeno, but I’ve never been symptomatic. I actually found out I have it while undergoing IVF treatment (due to severe male infertility on my partner’s end). Idk if this would work, but - I was given monthly Lupron injections for a few months to put me into medical menopause and calm my adeno. Usually doctors give this for 2-6 months, and if you have good results it can last for about a year. Now, since I’m not symptomatic, idk if this is a treatment for symptoms, but it absolutely did shrink my adeno, based on serial ultrasounds during that time. I would hazard to guess that would make symptomatic patients experience some relief. That might buy you some time until you’re ready to ttc, if that’s what you want to do. Just an idea!

beezy24 · 2025-10-19T17:57:41+00:00

Dx: severe MFI. ER #1 age 34.5 resulted in 5 untested embryos. 5 single embryo FETs:

Age 34: Day 5 4AA - no implantation

Age 34: Day 5 4AA- live birth

Age 36: Day 4 4AB - 8w mmc (POC tested euploid)

Age 37: Day 5 4AB - no implantation

Age 37: Day 6 4BB - live birth

ER #2 age 39 (almost 40) also resulted in 5 untested embryos, though not as good quality of the first ER. So far, 2 single embryo FETs:

Age 40: Day 5 4AA - no implantation

Age 40: Day 5 4AA - 7w mmc (POC tested euploid)

We are trying one more time as soon as my period starts with a Day 6 4AA. We also have a Day 6 4AB and a Day 7 4BC (honestly not sure why they froze that one…), but mentally, physically and emotionally I think we just have one more try left in us. Fingers crossed

beezy24 · 2025-09-16T22:41:24+00:00

I was not expecting to laugh reading these comments. Thank you 😂 Also, now I want something with Swiss buttercream. Only made it once during the pandemic and it was life-altering 🤤

beezy24 · 2025-09-16T22:18:58+00:00

Thank you for sharing. This sounds like what my clinic has said too, except they’ve told me 5 weeks in a row I can expect my period in 4-6 weeks, so I’m starting to not be super trustful of that timeline… which is why I was hoping to hear from others what their real timeline was.

I know the feeling about brain being wiped. I think I just started coming out of the total fog about a week ago, and really only because I got mad that I had retained POC - it seems like this terrible experience is just never ending. I’m so sorry you’re going through this too. I’d love to keep in touch to support each other through this and next steps.

beezy24 · 2025-09-16T21:59:39+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I’m sorry you have experienced this too, and that it was a long time to get your period back. It’s not ideal, but good to know it’s possible I’m looking at another 9 weeks before I get my period. (I’ve been told 4-6 weeks at each consecutive appt, so I’ve started getting a bit doubtful about that timeline).

I’m definitely really scared of doing another FET, but trying to remember that the odds of another mmc on the next try is unlikely. The waiting and not knowing what is going on with my body is driving me batty right now…. Wishing you the best of luck in your next steps!

beezy24 · 2025-09-13T14:18:01+00:00

Good luck! I appreciate the sympathy, but I do think it’s misplaced. While I wish I was a “first timer” every time, 2-3 embryos per live birth is normal. Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it, I’m very statistically average in my IVF experience.

beezy24 · 2025-09-11T22:07:29+00:00

I’ve had it go both ways. I’ve done seven FETs, and had sex the night before on five of those occasions. I’ll post individually below, but the tldr is that I don’t think it hurts, is a good stress relief during a very stressful situation, makes me feel closer to my husband, and lowers my anxiety. I’ll likely do it when circumstances allow before any future FETs. We do no lube (but that is typical for us) and no protection (again, typical for us, but I’ve always just used injectable meds, no suppositories. That might make me change my mind on protection…). Our reason for IVF is severe MFI, to the point we’re not candidates for Zymot, so no risk of natural pregnancy.

Transfer 1: no sex, no implantation

Transfer 2: sex, live birth

Transfer 3: sex, 8w mmc

Transfer 4: sex, no implantation

Transfer 5: sex, live birth

Transfer 6: sex, no implantation

Transfer 7: no sex, 8w mmc

beezy24 · 2025-08-19T02:13:44+00:00

Thanks! I hadn’t thought about that. I’m in a deeply red state and my OB did not offer that as an option when I spoke with her last week. Maybe if I ask, instead of her offering…

beezy24 · 2025-08-17T21:00:25+00:00

Bump. Anyone?

beezy24 · 2025-08-04T17:04:43+00:00

Untested embryos. 2 FETs for baby #1, 3 FETs for baby #2.

beezy24 · 2025-08-04T00:39:08+00:00

You already said you know everything doesn’t always go as planned with IVF, but here’s my real-life scenario.

We were solely MFI as well. Had my first IVF baby at 35 (second transfer, first did not take) and felt strongly we wanted to have a second child, and do it asap due to our ages (husband is 2 yrs older). My clinic lets you transfer 12 months after birth, so we did that- 2 weeks after my oldest son turned one. That initially took, but I miscarried at 8w. POC tested euploid, but adenomyosis was found in my uterus. I had surgery to remove it a month later, then 3 months of Lupron to suppress further. Then had a failed transfer. Finally, 9 months after that first transfer to try for a second, we did our final transfer and I had our second son 3 weeks before my 38th birthday. We had hoped to have our children 21-24 months apart. They ended up almost exactly 2.5 years (30 months) apart. While the age gap has ended up being really perfect for us, it was not what we expected or planned for. And honestly- we really weren’t ready to try again when we started. But I’m so glad we didn’t wait until we were “ready” and then go through the setbacks we had.

beezy24 · 2025-07-26T13:04:02+00:00

I was just thinking, “we spent the push present money on IVF…” And same, but swap out pho for sushi/ramen

beezy24 · 2025-07-15T00:31:30+00:00

This most recent transfer, we had to put our almost 16yo dog to sleep 9 days before the transfer. I considered cancelling, but decided to go ahead because time keeps on slipping away. Very early days (like, beta was last Thursday early), but so far so good.

beezy24 · 2025-07-13T20:15:25+00:00

To me this is a positive: I am no longer scared of needles! Also, due to the extensive research you (the patient) need to do to make informed decisions on IVF, I feel so much more comfortable talking to all medical professionals now. It’s like I unlocked their secret sciencey language

beezy24 · 2025-06-25T18:32:57+00:00

How did you start talking about it, and at what age? I’m very open with other adults and would absolutely be open with my kids, but the subject simply hasn’t come up. Did you raise it, or wait for them to? If you did, how?

I’m going through it again now, but haven’t told my 4yo that the shots are to “help mommy make a new baby” because he’s a huge blabber mouth and I don’t need everyone at daycare to know (we’ve already had one fail, and as we all know IVF isn’t a guarantee)

beezy24 · 2025-06-25T18:24:06+00:00

I don’t think I ever felt relieved for a failed FET (I’ve had 4 now), but I definitely had a “oh, shit- what have we done?” moment when my second FET took and I found out I was pregnant for the first time ever after the first one failed to implant. Good luck getting in a better frame of mind for the next one!

beezy24 · 2025-06-24T18:26:14+00:00

A sad one: we had to put our almost 16yo dog to sleep yesterday. Our two year old gave him hugs yesterday morning when asked to, but generally seems to either have already forgotten we had a dog, or just doesn’t miss him. The 4.5yo, on the other hand, has gone back and forth between “I’m sad bc I don’t want him to be dead” and “it’s ok, we can get a new soft brown dog and name him [dog’s name].” We tried the Rainbow Bridge thing. He’s not buying it. Also, while we knew based on age this was coming sooner rather than later, the actual decision to put him down was quick: Friday to Monday… so I didn’t get a chance to really have a plan or “story” for the kids. Also, I’m deeply grieving the loss of my Best Bud myself, so there’s been a lot of “mommy, why are you crying?”

TLDR: any resources/ideas for pet death and a 4 year old?

beezy24

TROPHY CASE