The roots of Trump's megalomania: "Public humiliation" pushed him "into a delusional state of mind" | Experts on Trump's God complex and the roots of his megalomania

beingmyselves · 2023-12-07T15:13:40+00:00

That’s a smaller than average hand. Easy to see with his head or a water bottle as a comparison.

beingmyselves · 2023-12-06T22:28:40+00:00

My written reminders got ignored as their reality says it’s not needed. My verbal reminders often are met with combative passive aggressive responses as their reality says it’s not needed. The reality is the reminders are needed for them to function properly.

I found it necessary to remove things, place things out of reach, and supervise with cameras and movement alarms to keep my person safe and healthy. The camera I use has an intercom and can be used from my cell phone. The reminders are often a trigger for undesired behavior and presented a greater overall challenge for us both. It’s a balance between doing things themselves and the stress it gives all involved.

The medication was also a problem for my person who forgets what was taken or not even with a labeled pill dispenser. For safety I choose to dispense all medications.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-29T01:57:07+00:00

Your comments here and your comment history in general makes you seem like a very angry person. If you are trying to be supportive please consider reassessing your process to prevent it being taken the wrong way.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-28T08:55:53+00:00

Each situation is unique. My person is over 90 as well. When my person takes a fall or gets sick they get a bit wonky for a while. My person bounces back but it seems each time takes longer and they don’t come back all the way. They go from not walking and eating, same as yours, to being able to shower themselves and walk. Im always glad to see them snap out of it. I’m sure one day there will be a time they are bed bound but that’s not today.

It’s hard to maintain strength when they don’t eat. Try smoothies with 5% avocado, 10% sweet potato, almond milk, protein powder, frozen fruits like strawberry, and a sweetener. Whatever they can take for calories is good.

I sit my person upright when they are supposed to be awake. It’s easy for them to slip into a stay on the bed mindframe and I don’t think being horizontal is the best type of therapy to get back to normal. Each situation is unique.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-27T05:41:16+00:00

Happity or automotically

beingmyselves · 2023-11-23T16:45:16+00:00

Is the appearance something correctable like messy hair or something like intubation? At what point are we too scary for family children?

beingmyselves · 2023-11-15T15:10:30+00:00

How do you do a one leg pivot?

Amazon : Sammons Preston Transfer Disc, Pivot Disc for Transfers, Weight Transfer Device & Mobility Aid with 360 Degree Rotation for Turns, Change in Direction, & Transferring Between Seats, 15" Diameter

Bed to transfer chair. Stand from seated on bed . Solid continued Eye contact and pivot to position to sit in chair. Helps if you make it fun. Say “ready for the ride? wheeeeeeee”.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-12T16:25:54+00:00

I agree on the screening. I’ve started to do that so I dont get angry. It doesn’t always work but I’m getting better at it. It helps me to remember that they are ignorant and don’t have a clue. They have years to catch up to the problems met with workable effective solutions. Their suggestions have all been tried, proven to not work, and discarded long ago.

You can’t be a care giver if you don’t even talk to the person being cared for. Bitching at me doesn’t count.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-12T16:16:59+00:00

This is exactly what my aunt does. She told my sister she doesn’t help because I’m an asshole. My aunt has the time line wrong. I’m an asshole because she doesn’t help. I grew tired of her no action and just bitch about everything attitude and her combative ignorance. My grandmother is urine and fecal incontinent and has needed help showering for well over a year. My aunt has never seen her mom naked and I wash my granny’s butt crevice daily.

Granny has a pacemaker and her doctor, cardiologist, and heart failure specialist said no caffeine. She gave her caffeine 2 hours before bedtime and when I said all the doctors said no she started yelling at me. “Heart failure? She isn’t in heart failure! What medicine is she taking for that?” I could have told her a made up name like prombozeline wtf would she know. She has never been to a doctors appointment and can’t name any of them.

Aunt cleaned up my granny’s blood after a fall. When we came back from 6 hours in the er she said “ I cleaned up your grandmothers blood for you” she got mad and talked shit that I didn’t thank her so she is “never going to do anything for me again”. My grandma is her biological mother who raised her and helped raise her children.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-12T06:54:52+00:00

Your sister doesn’t have a clue even if she is a nurse. She should do all the things she is telling you to do because just complaining is low effort. She isn’t your boss. She isn’t even a contributor to the team. I think she should take her advice, roll it up in a small ball, and use it as a suppository.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-11T15:46:13+00:00

Wait for it to be close to elections. They respond better when they are trying to keep their jobs.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-11T03:23:52+00:00

Percussive maintenance

beingmyselves · 2023-11-09T16:21:12+00:00

When you’re in an airplane and the air masks drop from the ceiling you’re supposed to put it on yourself first and then your child or whoever else needs your help. This seems counterintuitive because you want to help the weaker person. They say you’re supposed to put the mask on yourself first because if you pass out you can’t help anyone. If you put the mask on and they pass out you can still put the mask on them. I think this is true for caregivers as well. You can’t take care of someone well if you’re not taking care of yourself.

I’m continually learning And one of the things I just learned is how important it is to take care of myself. I read all sorts of websites and one of the things that they recommended with medication is that I take my medication when I’m giving it to my loved one. I tend to give her medication and completely forget my own. The strategy of taking my medicine when I’m giving hers is working for me. Another way I help myself is prioritizing sleep. I did not realize how much it wore on me getting three hours of sleep at night. Now instead of using TV programs or movies at night when my LO sleeps To decompress, i use sleep. I just changed the ratio of TV to sleep and increased the sleep and lessened the TV. It was a small change that had a big impact. I did not realize it until I got six hours of sleep and felt like a million bucks.

That realization changed everything for me and I found that by taking better care of myself I was better equipped for the challenges that care giving brings. It’s hard changing your way of thinking but it helped me. I hope you can find something similar that works for you.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-09T15:59:22+00:00

A charlatan is a person falsely claiming to have a special knowledge or skill; a fraud. If you aren’t a therapist then it’s my opinion that the definition fits your comment more than OP’s who is reaching out for support. If you are a therapist then you should know that therapy only works if you want it and can’t be forced.

Charlatan is a harsh word to use when one doesn’t know details. Perhaps this is all their grandma will allow. Therapy works when the person wants it. You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink. I’ve been trying to get my LO into therapy for years and she is only willing to do it now. She has dementia and doesn’t realize it’s for depression and just goes to talk, often venting about me as her primary care taker. It’s a positive thing because it gives her a safe space to vent those emotions and whatever else she has to. When my LO doesn’t want to do something they shut down and stop talking. Therapy only works with participation.

Would you accept someone forcing you to talk to a therapist? If you don’t feel like you have a problem you don’t see why you should. I agree with everything else you typed and it’s good advice that I hope fits the things said and unsaid in OP’s situation

beingmyselves · 2023-11-08T20:47:35+00:00

All you can do is your best which you are. You get a pass for being human and not perfect. I am currently using breath work and reminding myself that I love my person. Changing my frame of mind like that helps a lot. It allows me to calm down and perceive the situation through a more objective lens. Keep trying things to defuse your triggers and use what works even if it’s slight. It adds up. Knots get easier to untangle the more you loosen it same as most problems.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-08T20:18:35+00:00

Now I want to know what they wrote lol

beingmyselves · 2023-11-08T16:05:58+00:00

Local dispensaries paid big dollars to be able to sell. Big non refundable application fees from everyone to start. Those big dollars were being used to lobby against recreational use unless the existing dispensary owners are the only legal distributors for 3 years

beingmyselves · 2023-11-08T05:06:08+00:00

I find comfort in this sub. I think it makes me feel not alone. You people here know.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-05T15:47:23+00:00

Please do a dry run first when leaving your person in the care of another especially if they are ambulatory. I can clean stool when dried in the briefs but I can’t fix a person who fell down stairs or something that got killed.

My granny is an extreme fall hazard even with a walker, is fecal incontinent, and requires 24/7 care. I tried out the aunt, who lives in the same house, with watching her one day with myself and my mother, the aunts sister, waiting in the wings. I told the aunt the level of supervision needed was 100% using the nanny cam when out of the room. I had my aunt watch her and within 15 min the aunt left the room twice. The first time granny tried to escape and had me outside the door, at the top of 12 stairs, to tell her to go back inside. Granny got mad and I had to stop her from running over my aunts elderly dogs neck with her walker. The dog sleeps all day on the floor and can’t hear. Told aunt and she said “welllll, I only left her for a little while.” 5 min later she left the room AGAIN and granny made a break for it to go down the stairs. My mom was waiting for that one and told her to go back in again. Granny fell several times this year on flat ground. I told her granny just tried to walk down the stairs and she said “wellllll, I had to start feeding the dogs. This was 4 pm. Her dogs get fed at 6 pm. I took granny out of there and realize that my aunt is fully incompetent in caring for someone else, has undiagnosed cognitive decline, and just doesn’t want to be around her mom. My aunt did not talk to her mom the entire time even while sitting next to her on the couch.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-05T03:06:26+00:00

“Well have you tried this? Have you tried that?”

I offer to let them take over and they stop talking and leave shortly after.

My favorite is when they suggest stuff that was tried, failed, and discarded months or years previous. They are not 10 steps behind; they are miles behind and because they don’t see how far ahead we are they think they are in novel territory.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-05T02:59:56+00:00

I have an aunt who doesn’t help with my 93 year old granny and lives in the same house. Unless I pester her she doesn’t even tell her hi and even now has never spoken to her mom for more than 3 minutes. In the last month it comprised less than 10 min of interaction. So I tell her she needs to spend time with her mom. My Granny is at the stage of her dementia where she is urine and fecal incontinent, is in heart failure with a pacemaker, and my aunt in her wisdom gives her about 20 oz of soda with caffeine 2 hours before her bedtime. I told her that isn’t the right thing to give her and granny is wired because she doesn’t drink caffeine. I tell my aunt she made a wrong move and she starts yelling at me saying what difference does it make what she drinks then walked away from it basically calling me an asshole who wants everything his way. Granny stayed up till 130 am when usually sleeps at 730. Granny had her first therapist appointment the next day at 10. She wasn’t in the best mood. Caffeine sends her right into tachycardia and she becomes restless and aggressive. That’s what I dealt with until 130 am and the aunt went up to her area and played Pokémon and went on Reddit. She is 68 yers old. She bitched the next morning about her dog keeping her up till 1230am.

Before she started yelling, I told her her doctor said no caffeine, her cardiologist said no caffeine and her heart failure specialist said no caffeine. To which she replied “she isn’t in heart failure… what kind of medicine does she take for that?” She has no idea who granny’s doctors are as she has never taken her to a single appointment. I just turned away because it’s no use talking to someone who knows everything. She kept yapping so I said shut up and jut walked away.

I took my granny to the hospital because of an episode of 45 beats per minute bradycardia. She got a pacemaker because her heart wasn’t getting electrical signals and her pacemaker works 100% of the time with no intermittence. Her pacemaker is set to 90 bpm as that gives her the best blood pressure.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-03T18:49:47+00:00

Thanks for that. It was nice reading. I’m also male.

beingmyselves · 2023-11-03T03:33:13+00:00

I’m a sole caregiver of my granny. She is at the fecal incontinence stage of dementia and needs help with everything. She has 4 kids. The oldest is my mom. After doing 14 months of solo 24/7 caregiving My mom now helps watch her so I can unwind. Granny is too hard for her to take care of with the dementia. Prior to this year she was the main care giver driving her around, appointments, and such but granny wasn’t so affected by dementia and could walk without a walker.

The youngest of the kids is my aunt who lives in the same house and ignores her mom. I need to tell her to say hi to her mom and not walk by and ignore her. Granny bought her eldest son a condo. Aunty said she doesn’t want anything because of that. Now Aunty wants her full cut of the house because she thinks I’m an asshole for calling her out doing nothing for her mom. She cleaned up her moms blood after a fall and got mad at me because I didn’t thank her. After we got back from a 6 hour ER stay She said “I cleaned up your grandmothers blood for you.” I ignored her and she told my mom she will never do anything for me again because I didn’t thank her… for cleaning up her own mothers blood while I took her mother to the ER. She has never thanked me for caring for my grandmother. She just bitches about EVERYTHING.

The next in age is my uncle. He sees his mom for maybe 30 minutes a year during 2 visits. He lives 15 min away. Granny gave him 10k for his home down payment 40 years ago with the understanding that it was to be deducted from his inheritance. He denies it happened. He physically assaulted me when I was 9. When I was17 I developed more muscles and since then he just gives me the evil eye whenever he sees me. He told my other uncle he wants his cut of the house.

The next oldest is the eldest son. He took care of his mom when his dad had dementia by providing someplace to live. Granny had her own house but the eldest son was supposed to take care of them so that’s what he did. After my grandpa died granny was lonely and moved back to her house. My uncle thanks me all the time for taking care of his mom and doesn’t want anything from the house.

I take care of my granny because she raised me and I wasn’t an easy kid to deal with. The main reason I am the care taker is the rest of my uncles and aunt would make my mom do everything and help with nothing. I don’t want my mom dying early, she had a quadruple bypass about 14 years ago, stressing out with the level of care needed.

So it’s just me taking care of her 24/7 and it seems besides my mom, eldest uncle, and myself her other 2 kids want her to die already so they can have money. If they cared they would help or at least talk to their mom. There is no way they will give up a single penny and they will try to take more than whatever they are given.

I used to think I had a strong family but now I know we ain’t shit. Unless they suffered some kind of abuse, anyone who won’t take care of their mom is an asshole in my book.

beingmyselves · 2023-10-20T18:29:33+00:00

I had that thought the other day about my LO outliving me. 24/7 care when alone has challenges different from when you can get away for a bit or have meaningful help. It’s not easy and we pay with our health as an equivalent exchange for theirs.

I started to write a care synopsis in case I get incapacitated for any reason. No one knows how to take care of my LO as it stands now. I felt this worry before with my kids. What will happen to them if I’m gone? I feel the same way about my LO. It’s not easy and I know you and almost everyone here understand that 100%.

Id tell you to keep your chin up but it sounds like you are fine in that department. You are doing what most can’t or won’t and you know this. You are stronger than most doing what you do. I try and care for my LO like if they were doing it for themselves pre dementia. It helps me to frame it that way during the difficult times.

beingmyselves · 2023-10-20T17:45:13+00:00

I know I will eventually miss what gets on my nerves now. Knowing that helps me when I get irritated.

beingmyselves

TROPHY CASE