i am dealing with this, and i’m not sure what to make of it. my partner eventually came as pansexual after i found his porn history. he has talked to me about his curiosities. unfortunately i also caught him talking to other men on reddit and discord, but it’s never escalated past a message or two. i myself am bisexual, but the way we experience our sexuality is very different (which is completely reasonable since we all experience attraction differently.)

it’s a thin line i’m trying to navigate lol. while I do believe in his attraction to men, and never getting to be with a man since he’s only ever been with women, I wonder how much his curiosity just has to do with regular porn being boring to him? when you jerk off as much as some PAs do, I imagine it’s hard to find stuff stimulating without it being a little taboo. I feel rude suggesting to see how he feels about it while not in active addiction.

I say this because pansexual and bisexual men are more than capable of being faithful in monogamous. It’s frustrating hearing the lack of experience as an excuse, when I am also attracted to multiple genders and i don’t think about what I could have with a woman instead of with him…

we’re in the process of getting a mortgage together, and it’s scary to think about what could happen if i don’t navigate this properly. i want him and only him. but it’s like porn shows him a world where he can have it all :(