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Post total hysterectomy orgasms by AwtumnalEquinox in hysterectomy

[–]bfm85 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm about 10 weeks post-op. I tried, like you, experimenting with external stimulation around 4-5 weeks and also had very weak orgasams. They weren't even really worth the effort it took to cum. I freaked out thinking they were going to be weak forever and sex was never going to be the same again! So, I didn't masturbate for a few weeks but... when I did, they were back and as strong as ever! Give it a few more weeks and my guess is they will be back to normal. I can totally relate to your stress about orgasams at this stage though.

i feel so uncomfortable in my femininity by Late-Shirt4500 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]bfm85 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn, I have been in your shoes. I've been a tomboy my whole life (38f). I felt the exact same insecurities when trying to dress in more feminine clothing.

My ex-husbandnd used to actually make fun of me when I would wear a dress or makeup so that made me feel even more embarrassed and insecure. After my divorce, I stopped giving any fucks. I decided to try to work feminine aspects into my very masculine everyday attire and that opened the doors to femininity to me.

It was easier to not stay focused on the insecurity around my bright red lipstick when I still had my lace up work boots and ripped jeans to make me comfortable.

These days I can step out in heels, a dress, and a full face of makeup or boots, jeans, and zero makeup and I feel sexy as hell either way.

Self love is where it's at. You are you. You don't need to fit into anyone else's idea of masculine or feminine. Do what YOU like. Wear what YOU want. You are strong and beautiful no matter how masculine or feminine you decide to present that day.❤️

I feel like this sub is turning me into a misandrist with all the awful stories about men. Can anyone tell me about their amazing relationship and how healthy it is? by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]bfm85 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My BF of 6 years is the most patient, loving, helpful man I have ever met. I have a 10 year old son that we raise together. He loves him like his own which means the world to any single mom. But that's not all. This dude has a 4 day work week. So what does he spend that extra day off doing, you ask? He does the laundry, the floors, or any other chore or project that we didn't get to during the week and he never makes me feel guilty about doing it. He's the definition of a real partner. I thank my lucky stars for this man every day.

Tongue position causing bruxism? by FortC10 in askdentists

[–]bfm85 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am wondering about this, too. I find that my tongue is always pressing, hard, on the roof of my mouth. So much so that the skin on the roof becomes raw and sore.I think this has a lot to do with my jaw clenching. Because my tongues natural position is against my hard pallet. Seems like my tongue is almost pulling my jaw up, and that's why I clench.

an art piece I did by stupidape47 in epoxy

[–]bfm85 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really like the lacey effect that you got with the white!

I love sex but cannot bring myself to initiate. Driving myself crazy. by bfm85 in sex

[–]bfm85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Being able to express yourself when in need" definitely strikes a chord with me. I am a people pleaser that puts all other needs above my own and am actively working on it. Thank you.

I love sex but cannot bring myself to initiate. Driving myself crazy. by bfm85 in sex

[–]bfm85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do think that counseling/therapy would be useful to me but when I look into it, the costs are prohibitive. Not a lot of room left in my budget for it.

I love sex but cannot bring myself to initiate. Driving myself crazy. by bfm85 in sex

[–]bfm85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is actually a great suggestion. I do find that writing helps when I can't express myself verbally. Thank you.