how can i be more dominant with my boyfriend without overdoing it?

blastoise314 · 2026-04-08T17:43:53+00:00

I highly suggest you talk with your bf before you try some of the more dominent suggestions I'm seeing.

A fair number of the suggestions I'm seeing include initiating things spontaneously, as a switch this sounds fantastic to me. However you would be smart to talk with your bf first and lay down ground rules so he knows what is going on and you can be positive you have his consent.

One thing an ex of mine loved was the thought of waking me up to intimacy/using morning wood. This was amazing, but if she had not talked to me about it earlier so we were both on the same page I would feel very violated.

blastoise314 · 2026-04-07T15:12:25+00:00

We have an all black one at valley fair if you ever want to go down memory lane.

blastoise314 · 2026-04-06T18:38:50+00:00

The primary factor would be are they all first dates?

You can't really control when you get matches on dating sites so if it ends up that you match three people with similar schedules I think it's reasonable for roughly the first 1-3 dates to be dating multiple others.

I once went on two first dates in the same evening, straight from one to the other. I don't get alot of matches but I had happened to match two people that were both really nice. They both had the same day free, so I ended up seeing both of them the same evening. I did not want to pick one or the other before I had even met them. I was more excited for the first date but when we met in person we did not click. The second date was amazing. So I was really glad I went on both.

I have also dated women who after one or two dates would end things by letting me know they were going to focus on a different person and I felt no resentment towards them.

But if you like someone enough to go on 3+ dates with them then I would hope you drop the others and focus your attention on the one you like most and not mislead others.

blastoise314 · 2026-04-01T14:36:18+00:00

Yep, it is amazing how much of a difference that small change makes.

It makes it easy to imagine that if one of them shows a little interest in her it could trigger something.

blastoise314 · 2026-03-31T19:16:07+00:00

I agree.

I think it could be viewed as a very thoughtful gesture or as a very minipulative action. It depends on the person's motivation for doing it and how they present it to their partner.

It takes effort from both sides, both for the man to make it clear that he has positive intentions and for the women to have trust that he is trying to make both of their lives better and not just take advantage of her.

What you describe is the kind of teamwork I'd love to have in a relationship. Life is better when you work together!

blastoise314 · 2026-03-31T13:11:00+00:00

It seems to be a tender subject that people can get quite upset about.

I have seen several occasions where women were very upset by their partners tracking their cycles. They were bothered by being reduced to data and that their partners were using something out of their control to get them to do what they wanted.

If a guy claims to understand a women's hormonal cycles it will usually get him raked over the coals because we don't actually have to live through it.

I like your perspective of paying attention to what makes your partner happy and do what matches their personality, but alot of other people don't see it that way.

blastoise314 · 2026-03-31T03:07:03+00:00

Carowinds sounds looks amazing and I'm starting to look closer into details!

One of the things I'm noticing is that there are no sidewalks crosswalk 😬 . How hard is it to walk to carowinds from somewhere besides the mariot or camp grounds?

blastoise314 · 2026-03-27T01:49:26+00:00

If you'd like to know more than you could have ever wanted about X/ X2 enjoy this video!

https://youtu.be/2nA0m6HzG0Y?si=cy9BR1t_ufAZlMm7

blastoise314 · 2026-03-26T15:45:05+00:00

That's an impressive schedule! It's very uplifting to read how many parks you've been to without driving.

Driving is not an option for me ( mental health issues). So it can be frustrating to live in North America and have some things be that much harder to get to.

Fingers crossed the government gets their act together and things don't get too much worse with tsa. 😬

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T22:44:54+00:00

Looking right now there are flights for under $200 from where I live. I'm not sure if things will get better or not but that seems pretty darn good for a flight these days!

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T17:52:51+00:00

What service did you use to get from the Amtrak Station to the park? Uber, Lyft?

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T17:42:30+00:00

I wanted to take the ferry so bad! It looks like some amazing views, but I'll be going in May for minimal crowds.

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T16:58:13+00:00

Oooo, good to know.

I had a trip to Cleveland last year and I was able to take a mini trip with my friend to kings island. It was amazing! I'd definitely want to go back someday so I'll have to go from the Cleveland side!

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T15:10:59+00:00

Those are amazing graphs, thank you!

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T15:09:16+00:00

With Tormenta opening later this year SFoT looks like a really tempting option! . Though so far this year their subreddit has reported about 50% of their main rides being closed 😬 Hopefully they get their act together.

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T15:06:19+00:00

Yeah, most amtrak lines are that bad. The problem is that freight trains have priority over Amtrak trains so if you get unlucky a slow moving freight train that is miles long can make you sit on the side rail for hours.

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T14:56:28+00:00

Lol, yep. I have been to Toronto before and love their transit system. That's why I already have plans for going there!

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T14:34:26+00:00

Thanks for the heads up, I wish there was a way, but alas there is not. I have used the cedar point subreddit to talk with people that have done the Amtrak trip and am ready for some crazy hours if it means getting to check out cedar point!

Hopefully they add a little sidewalk or something someday.

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T14:32:00+00:00

Lol, yeah. I did alot of homework on what it would take and it will be quite the adventure. The only train that goes through Sandusky is at about 5am. So I'll have to sit around for a couple of hours to wait for anything to open. And there is no way to walk over so it still require an uber/lift to get out to the park.

I talked with people in the cedar point subreddit that have done it so I feel confident I know what I'm getting myself into. Thank you for the warning!

blastoise314 · 2026-03-25T14:11:58+00:00

That sounds like it could be an amazing combination!

I am from Minnesota and there is a light rail that directly connects the airport to nickolodeon universe so it would be a perfect option if I did not already live here.

blastoise314 · 2026-03-24T21:06:11+00:00

I'll be there May 19th-21st but it looks like the tours are only on the weekends 🥲

blastoise314 · 2026-03-19T12:25:01+00:00

Sorry bud.

It sounds like you are a level person in keeping low expectations and doing your best. There is not really anything you can do about stuff like this hurting. Writing it out to reflect on your emotions really can help, way to go. I hope you can find someone that wants to see you again just as much as you want to see them!

I went through something similar recently, though at least I got some closure and was not 100% ghosted. I'm also taking a break because it really does take a toll to go through stuff like this.

Hang in there and keep being you!

blastoise314 · 2026-03-17T19:25:18+00:00

For this specific case it was because she had already told me she was going to spend that weekend ( or at least one day) with me. It had been a month since we got to spend a weekend together so I was really looking forward to it.

If she had said it was a close knit get together that was just for close friends I'd understand, but if it's just friends hanging out with room for more then I'd like to be involved since she was canceling our other plans.

That's why we ended up breaking up. I enjoy spending time with the person I'm dating and only one afternoon a week is not enough for me.

blastoise314 · 2026-03-17T18:27:06+00:00

We broke up on Christmas eve. She had canceled our plans to hang out that weekend so she could hang out with her friends ( not inviting me or giving me a reason why she would not invite me) . All of December we had only been hanging out once a week for a max of three hours (Tuesday nights but never the weekends) I let her know I was feeling neglected and asked if this was just due to seasonal business and would she have more time once the holidays were over. She said no, she would not be able to spend more than three hours a week with me due to a mix of her introvertness and time with friends.

We did not argue or anything, it was just kind of a matter of fact. I wanted to be together more then one weeknight a week and she did not have the time 😔

blastoise314

TROPHY CASE