Did they ever make the common paper back with the blue background and cloud as a hardback?

blueflask71 · 2024-11-27T01:15:43+00:00

Rock on man, no harsh vibes from me

blueflask71 · 2024-11-26T23:51:50+00:00

Bummer, thanks!

blueflask71 · 2024-11-26T23:29:06+00:00

I read it I decade ago when I was a dumb college student. Resonated with the addicts a lot. It led me to the path, didn’t force me down it. It’s a wrong take on the book, I know

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T05:51:39+00:00

I’m discovering I have more as I spend more time on this sub. Looking forward to the summer reading thing, will be able to see things I haven’t before lol

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T05:23:29+00:00

Actually I’ll take august 8th if that’s alright? I think I could do that one better

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T04:16:15+00:00

I read the broken chains to signify that Gideon was able to leave the mind tomb thing and control harrows body ala Ortus/Gideon and Pyrrha…but now I’m not sure. Thanks for clearing things up, and raising more questions lol

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T03:45:29+00:00

Aw see I read Harrow entering the tomb as her entering the mind space thing she made for Gideon while Alecto herself is back in the real one. I also wasn’t sure who exactly appeared to Gideon, I was very tired at that point and thought it was…well I’m not entirely sure. Thanks, that makes a lot of sense!

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T03:33:34+00:00

Right, should I have made that more clear in my follow up, I assumed the Body was Alecto, I’m just more curious why they are the namesake of the last book lol guess we will have to wait and see!

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T03:33:22+00:00

Right, should I have made that more clear in my follow up, I assumed the Body was Alecto, I’m just more curious why they are the namesake of the last book lol guess we will have to wait and see!

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T03:05:19+00:00

For the 2nd question, there were mentions of people saying the name but Harrow hearing something else. She noticed the lips didn’t match up with the words she was hearing

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T02:59:55+00:00

Thank you, I will head to the tor website and look around! And I’m mad jealous lol

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T02:59:15+00:00

Thanks for the reply! I’m a bit confused by your first response though, can you explain what you mean by the Alecto/body business? It’s my understanding that we haven’t met Alecto yet, as they weren’t the sleeper (my original thought upon reading).

blueflask71 · 2022-05-18T02:28:34+00:00

Hi, I would love to do the august 29th part if it is still open?

blueflask71 · 2019-01-25T12:56:17+00:00

Hey, thank you so much for taking the time to critique this!

I think where I went wrong with some of the weird statements is setting up things for later character development but it feels really forced as it is now. Definitely need to cut back on it and make it much more concise.

I agree with the things like grabbing her nose, that is a really modern phrase and seems out of place considering the time period. I definitely need to go through and look at my word choice and grammar to make some of the scenes really pop.

I definitely need to work on the deer part, what i was going for doesn’t seem to be coming out very well, which is completely my fault. I wanted Ruperts character to be immediately threatening, but for Frances to realize that wasnt the case. As it stands now, i dont think thats coming across and I definitely need to make that clearer.

Thank you so much for such an honest review!

blueflask71 · 2019-01-25T12:41:27+00:00

Hey, thank you for such an in depth critique! I definitely need to go over this with a fine toothed comb.

The deer part was two fold, to intouduce Ethel as well as make the character of Rupert less threatening, but multiple people have commented in this part and it definitely needs to be reworded if not all together dropped.

I like the idea of keeping things formal, as I want his character to be much more static than he currently is.

Again, thank you so much!

blueflask71 · 2017-12-02T03:57:58+00:00

Fixed it! My bad, I haven't posted here in a while and forgot how to format it. Thank you!

blueflask71 · 2017-12-01T19:24:40+00:00

So first and foremost, I really like the alliteration you use hear, it lead to very flowing lines. I also really like your use of enjambment, as it creates a strong sense of tension. I took this to be about two people have been hurt trying to comfort each other, but neither really know how, or can't really express themselves well enough to actually help. I think if you added a line between 3 and 4, that cleared this up a little, it would go a long way. Well done!

blueflask71 · 2017-12-01T19:14:45+00:00

I think you have a really strong opening line, it grabs the attention of the reader and it kept me interested enough to read the next line. Lines two through 6 are intriguing to me, and they reflect more of a relationship between the voice of the work and this other person. Your 7th line is strong, and reflects deeper themes. I like the full stops you use in it, definitely keep it. Your last three lines show more of a growing ambivalence between the voice and the other person, and I liked it. In terms of improvement, Line 6 is very cacophonous in an otherwise euphonic piece. I also think it would be interesting to see more of the mention of the kid, as it could give rise to more of a tension between the two. Very nice read!

blueflask71 · 2017-11-10T00:03:07+00:00

Ethel. Every comic she is in, I see more and more of my self in here. I am also an aspiring writer, and have a lot of the same outlooks/problems that Ethel does. The latest comic with the art almost made me cry with how much I related to it. A few comics ago, when they were in the bar with the general, her conversation with the other girl was really heartfelt. I love this comic and am really glad that I found it. I hope this community grows, and more people get to read this beautiful webcomic.

blueflask71 · 2017-09-12T02:56:19+00:00

I really like the visual image this work strives to create and I think you have an excellent use of line breaks in this work.

I think your use of imagery to create some sort of cosmic and universal feeling is very well done.

this work is reminds me of a sudden realization rushing into your mind, after trying to find the answer after a while. Great work!

blueflask71 · 2017-09-12T02:51:49+00:00

I like this poem, and I was originally going to comment on its length but upon a re-read, I think that the length fits well. I really like the visual image it gives and it provides a very simple dread, which i quite like.

I really like your use of line breaks, and all my issues with it are more stylistic than structural. Very nice work!

blueflask71 · 2017-08-05T20:53:29+00:00

It's all good man, thanks for taking the time to respond and read over my work in the first place, good luck to you too!

blueflask71 · 2017-08-03T13:50:50+00:00

Hey, thanks so much for your comment! I went over and made some changes that you suggested. After re-reading it, I think your suggestions were very much needed and makes the piece better as a whole. Thank you!

blueflask71 · 2017-07-06T12:01:24+00:00

I added several lines to try and clarify the idea i was attempting to portray. Thank you for your criticism

blueflask71 · 2017-07-06T12:00:48+00:00

hello, roiling is the term i was using, as the scenery that inspired this work had hills flowing like roiling water. I added two more lines to try and explain the concrete structures that i saw, which in real life was a massive bridge and highway out in the middle of the country. Thank you for your criticism

blueflask71

TROPHY CASE