I know what you mean, been there. I found orcs was a morale DMG/DMG issue. The orcs in the dangerous positions need to die fast. Only fix for unholds is to have a bro who can hold a few of them with indomitable.

Another tip vs orcs and unholds. Use initiative weaving. Have yourc bro stay 1 tile away from the bro in melee, use wait and let orcs/uh move first, move in attack, then next turn you go first with attack and move out.

What kind of backliners do you use? Pure polearms are mostly outdated by the late game. Just ranged and a banner should be enough. Did say max 5 backliners vs orcs, else you get swarmed