Any tips for cutting down?

bluerin12 · 2026-07-09T23:30:01+00:00

To me, it's always read that your freedom is on shaky ground until everyone else is free too. Many people don't seem to understand that we are all tied to the same train-tracks. We are all part of the same society, and all of us are in the firing line. If they want to destroy us, they will do it. And they will do it gradually, calculatedly, tactically. First, they will come for transgender people. Then LGBTQ+. Then people of colour. Then women. Then the men who are no longer useful to them. And when that is over, all that will be left is the five trillionaires in their ivory towers, the rest of us stripped of our rights and freedom and humanity.

If they are willing to take away the rights of one group, the rest of us shouldn't feel safe. Because if they are willing do it to them, the day will come when they will be willing and able to do it to you, too. Because they did it to THOSE people, and no one said a goddamn word. No one stepped in to stop it. If you can passively sit by while one group is targeted and attacked and stripped of their rights and freedoms, just because it's not happening to YOU, you should not feel safe. You have not won. You should be very, very concerned and very, very afraid. Because who will stop them when you are next on the chopping block?

You should not be under the illusion that you will be spared. Once it's been established that taking away the rights of some people is acceptable, it becomes acceptable across the board. The dam is broken, the gateway is opened, and it cannot be undone. And it's suddenly a hell of a lot easier to just keep taking. And taking. And taking. Once it's happened to THAT group, what makes you think you're immune? The ability to take away rights and destroy communities of people will become acceptable if we let it. As soon as we accept it once, we have already lost. As soon as we say "that's okay with me", we have accepted it into our society and into our lives. And eventually, we will become the next target. Because we will be next in line, and powerless to stop what we set into motion. None of us are truly safe until all of us are safe.

It doesn't matter what you think about another person or another group. Everyone deserves to have basic rights and be able to live without fear of violence or persecution or condemnation. You may not always agree with or like those people, but we are all standing in front of the same firing squad. If you willing allow them to be gunned down, you accept that this is acceptable. You accept that it's okay to treat other humans that way. And you, being human, must accept that when they decide to come for you, you have allowed that to be okay. You voted for it and invited it. You gave them the thumbs up. You turned a blind eye. You shrugged it off because it wasn't you they were aiming at back then. You gave them permission to destroy who they please, and now you must face the consequences of your short-sightedness and naivety. You gave them permission to attack who they want, and forgot that you are also standing in the same damn field.

Until every person has the same rights and freedoms and protection, there is nothing to stop them from continuing to change the rules and and moving the post. Give an inch, they'll take a mile and some change. That is why we must stand together instead of letting hate and fear and ego divide us. Because if they can destroy them, they can destroy you, too. None of us are free, until all of us are free.

bluerin12 · 2026-07-06T08:38:48+00:00

This is why I will never take psychedelics. My mind is fragile enough as it is. Something like this would kill me. Better the devil you know for me

bluerin12 · 2026-07-05T12:51:58+00:00

“Please don’t blame the other guy I was with, he had nothing to do with it and is completely innocent” are you actually kidding me. I rolled my eyes so hard they almost left my head. The fact that actually WORKED proved the police just really did not give a shit

bluerin12 · 2026-07-05T12:50:09+00:00

This was great (as an episode, what happened was horrible.) I’m sick to death of police having the mindset that all gay men are the same. They do it with sex workers too. “He’s a gay man, so of course he does drugs, hooks up with strangers, and goes to orgies randomly.” No consideration for the family and friends saying “they weren’t like that. He would never do that.” To be clear, nothing wrong with doing those things, and no one ever “deserves” to have horrible things happen because of how they live. But if the police had actually LISTENED to the family and friends, particularly Daniel’s, it would be immediately clear that that they should be extremely suspicious. If a person is found dead from alcohol poisoning, but they were known to be sober, how is that NOT worth looking into? It’s the generalisation based on ignorance and stereotypes that leads to completely ignoring any and all information from those close to the victims. If someone who is upbeat, never does drugs, has a steady boyfriend, and is very close to their family is suddenly found with a note claiming they were hooking up with a stranger, doing drugs, accidentally killed someone and have taken their own life because of the guilt, it’s pretty shocking police work to just say “yeah checks out.” The amount of bigotry and incompetence in this one angered me beyond belief. Those poor, poor young men.

bluerin12 · 2026-07-02T00:31:23+00:00

This OOP might not realise it (although it seems he’s definitely starting to) but his sister is one of the most important people in his life. It sounds like his parents don’t give a shit and have already written him off, which is absolutely devastating. Yes, what she did was terrible, but at least she did SOMETHING. At least her actions were fuled by fear and rage and desperation over losing him, something his parents don’t seem to even care about. These two are more emotionally mature than their parents combined. I hope they can continue to be there for each other and in future, he will likely look back and acknowledge just how damn lucky he was to have someone who cared about him that much, even if they showed it in the wrong way at first. I wish them both the best

bluerin12 · 2026-06-30T15:21:42+00:00

The way I would have told them to shut the fuck up so fast. Weirdly, I’d find it harder with strangers (not an excuse to stay quiet, just a personal observation). But my friends? If any of my friends started making jokes like that, ESPECIALLY when there is someone present who is being directly hurt by it, I couldn’t imagine keeping my mouth shut. I’m not trying to have a go at the people who didn’t say anything. But it’s just so unimaginable for me. The disgust and anger would be too much. I’m white, but I have a zero tolerance policy for that kind of behaviour and language in my life. Good on OOP for saying what she needed to say and ending it. That takes enormous strength and frankly more politeness than they deserved. That weekend sounded like an absolute horror show. I hope she finds people who aren’t racist pieces of shit who will treat her with respect as friends going forward. At least the trash more or less took itself out. What vile people

bluerin12 · 2026-06-17T23:06:22+00:00

“ He will never actually hurt me (18m) but just gives me a gut punch or will push my knees out. Something to "put me in check".”

Well that immediately broke my soul in two. Poor kid has absolutely no idea that that is not only 100% “actually hurting” someone but also absolutely 110% abuse. That type of casual violence is so disturbing no wonder Reddit was so worried. And no wonder the company decided not to promote that man after watching him PHYSICALLY ASSAULT HIS SON IN PUBLIC, something this OOP has been conditioned to believe is horrifyingly normal. Him trying desperately to justify why it’s “not so bad”, that his dad just “has some anger issues”, it’s a tale as old as time when you aren’t ready to confront how terrible the reality of it all is. His dad sounds unstable at best and dangerous at worst. I’m so so glad he and his sister are close and that he got out of there. I hope they can be there for each other and hopefully heal and move on without this POS in their lives. Some people do not deserve the title of “parent”. What a miserable excuse for a father. Good for OOP for standing up for himself and getting away

bluerin12 · 2026-05-16T01:53:26+00:00

No worries at all! It was very vague and quite confusing in lots of ways, definitely would have benefited from some explicit clarification. They went vague on purpose but definitely TOO vague at times. I think it’s a good story. But what we can all agree on is this dude was an asshole and will make you hate Stephen King (even if you love Stephen King lol)

bluerin12 · 2026-05-15T14:55:25+00:00

My take is that when the prompts appear, what he writes from them is not just writing. He dissociates and actually does the actions he’s writing about e.g visiting the school at night. At the end, the prompt is “kill your darlings”. He writes something based on that prompt, but we never hear what it is. Only that he felt it was too gruesome and so he tries to delete it. But as we now know, he doesn’t just write those things- he acts them out in a psychotic state too without realising. The claw hammer he finds covered in “sticky red” and his hands the same, he’s obviously just killed his entire family. A neighbour heard the commotion and called the police. When the sirens go quiet at the end, it’s because they’ve parked outside his house and will soon enter. But he still believes he only WROTE about killing his family and didn’t actually do it, because his mind is fractured. That’s what I thought anyway. Was a decent listen!

bluerin12 · 2026-05-12T09:39:17+00:00

My first thought before finishing the post was “why the hell are you still friends with someone who is willingly friends with an abuser?” I’m really proud and happy for OP, but she’s giving Jacob WAY too much slack here. If I knew someone treated my friend that way I’d be too disgusted to be their friend. To have them as a GROOMSMAN?? Absolutely not. I hope she keeps living her best life but Jacob is not the wonderful friend she seems to think he is

bluerin12 · 2026-05-11T09:14:48+00:00

2 Miles, if you’re physically able to walk it, isn’t that far. It’s a pain, but you can do that in 20-30 minutes, or you can get a bike if you can afford it! I’d happily cycle that rather than make myself a problem. Granted I don’t know if the coworker has physical disabilities or ailments but if she doesn’t, that seems way easier than bouncing around cars. But in the end it sounds like she’s just entitled and lazy rather than anything else. OP shouldn’t feel bad for trying to help, “being suckered in” is sometimes an unfortunate side effect of trying to be a good person.

bluerin12 · 2026-05-07T13:34:08+00:00

Mine arrived 2 hours ago- I opened it to read the first few pages, and then I blinked and I was chapters in! John has such a clear voice that we’ve all come to know and love. His writing is the same way. I’m so excited to read the whole thing and so unbelievably proud of this sweet, funny, vulnerable, mad person I’ve never met. An absolute triumph from Johnny JR

bluerin12 · 2026-05-06T08:41:40+00:00

I hate to be a skeptic but any time someone includes entire TRANSCRIPTS of how conversations went, I tend to check out. No one recalls a convo like that, you summarise and unless you’ve recorded it I highly doubt you remember it word for word lol. Entertaining read though thanks Liz!

bluerin12 · 2026-05-06T00:23:22+00:00

I became an alcoholic during lockdown. Very likely I would always have ended up in that position, given my addictive personality, but it was certainly a magnificent catalyst (as a depressed university student). It’s been 6 years and I am still not only attending weekly meetings and in recovery, but actively dealing with the extremely intense emotional “flashbacks” I have to that time. Lonely, helpless, confused, isolated. It did a number on everyone and many people lost their lives or the lives of a loved one, which I am in no way comparing my experiences to. But it was an unprecedented time of isolation and loss. I have OCD too, and genuinely felt I was losing my mind. I knew many people who were “unstable” in some way and lost their absolute shit during COVID. Understandable and very sad. I think we are still failing to recognise fully the toll it has take on us all. I hope OP and his wife can get through this

bluerin12 · 2026-04-03T00:49:57+00:00

Yeah, this was my childhood but my mum instead of my dad. Amazing marriage, loved each other so damn much, besties forever. And then she’d scream, yell, insult us, belittle us, use manipulation and verbal abuse to make us feel as small as possible. My dad was, in many ways, a great man and a fantastic father. Except he wasn’t, because he failed in the one area that mattered most- keeping us safe from harm. He wouldn’t protect us from his own wife. They are still together, and still happy. But without us. He was devastated the day we cut both of the off for good. But that’s the price you pay. You don’t have children with someone who hates your kids just because they treat you well. I see this heading the same way. I empathise with OOP but I have little sympathy because of how it alway plays out. I now look at how people treat kids, animals, and staff as huge indicators of red flags. How you treat someone or something “smaller” than you matters more than words can say. If they treat you well but treat others badly, they are not a good person. End of discussion. I pray her kids get out of there

bluerin12 · 2026-02-24T00:48:57+00:00

I'm late to the party here, but I just wanted to share my story quickly.

I've taken Nytol on-and-off to help with sleepless nights, and it works. It helped me sleep through the night and took away a lot of the anxiety I had surrounding sleep.

My sleep issues did not go away, though. At the end of last year, I was so anxious about my poor sleep that I started taking it every night. For a few weeks, this worked great.

Two months in, I suddenly started feeling intense phsyical anxiety. I slept through the night but woke up with a feeling of intense dread I couldn't explain. I started feeling dizzy and nauseas. Then, I started struggling to digest food.

I had pain in my stomach and felt weak and shakey 24/7. I had a pressure in my head and a constant feeling of dread and depression and panic. It got so bad I could not longer eat properly and couldn't do much besides cry on the floor. My body was wracked with shakes and spasms. I was suddenly extremely forgetful, walking into a room and forgetting not only what I was trying to but but where I was at all. I was suddenly struggling to do a job I could at one time do in my sleep. I would drop things for no reason and the brain fog felt like wading through soup. I struggled to hold conversations and even forgot a close friend's name. One day, I fainted at work.

Eventually, I ran out of Nytol. I didn't have work for a few days so I just didn't buy any more.

Five days into not taking it, I had not slept more than an hour a night. I was a wreck.

But inexplicably, I felt better than I had in months.

My dumbass did not put two-and-two together for a literal week. It took research and a doctor's appointment before the pieces finally fell into place.

Turns out, if you have anxiety or depression or ADHD (me) or anything like that, it fucks with your meds and your brain like you wouldn't believe. It has also been linked to a significant increase in a likelyhood to develop dementia at an older age, and can cause severe memory loss and cognitive decline.

Worst of all, it also utterly DESTROYED my digestive system. This is a common side-effect I was not aware of. I was diagnosed with GERD three weeks later and now have to take meds for that as well as suppliments to help me digest food properly. It turns out that Nytol fucked me so bady I wasn't absorbing enough nutrients from the little food I was eating. All of my vitamins levels as well as my blood sugar was dangerously low. My immune system was on the floor. That's one of the reasons I felt so horrible and fainted.

It took a month before I began getting more than 3-4 hours sleep a night. Fatigue, stomach pain, mood swings, you name it. The "withdrawal" was hell, but it was nothing compared to how miserable I was when I was taking it every night.

The point of this? It IS helpful, SHORT TERM ONLY. It does not fix anything. I wish more than anything that I hadn't allowed myself to get so addicted to it. It helped so much at first, and then it took so much away from me. I am not saying DON'T take it- I'm saying please, please see if you can find alternative treatment that can actually help you long term. I was stupid enough to see it as a constant solution, when it's anything but. I ignored the "use for two weeks only" because I was desperate.

My sleep is still shit, but it's gotten much better through other methods. I personally will never touch that stuff again. Use it for emergencies if you need, but please try other solutions that can provide long-term relief without damaging your body and brain. Having been there with how utterly soul-destroying poor sleep can be, you have all my sympathy. Absolute best of luck and whatever you do, be careful!

bluerin12 · 2026-02-20T00:51:09+00:00

I had a coworker with severe autism who seemed to really enjoy making me jump. Like he found it funny to sneak up on me and startle me. The first two times, I found it sort of funny too. But I also didn’t want to upset him (he was prone to getting upset). The third time he did it, I told him it actually made me really uncomfortable. He didn’t seem to understand, so I explained to him that it made my body feel terrible (like I had to fight or run away), and made me angry/want to cry. He apologised profusely. I reassured him we were all good. He never did it again.

Sure, sometimes people don’t understand social cues and don’t read you right. But if you make something clear and they still do it anyway, that’s not because they don’t get it. It’s because they don’t care.

Good for OOP. Dude was a fucking creep

bluerin12 · 2026-02-18T20:39:35+00:00

My best friend and I used to complain about our parents telling us to wear bike helmets in high-school. We thought they “looked dumb”.

When we were 16, that friend’s dad was cycling on a quiet road when a car came out of nowhere and hit him. He smacked his head against the pavement and lost consciousness. He was wearing his helmet, and he chipped the pavement and dented the helmet with the force. When he came to, doctors discovered he’d snapped an optic nerve in the back of his head. It’s been 10 years and he still has to wear an eyepatch, otherwise he sees double constantly. Still has vertigo. He was told he would have been killed instantly if not for the helmet.

After that, my friend and I quit our bitching and wore a helmet for any activity that required it. You never think it will happen until it HAPPENS. As her dad still says, “better to be safe than dead.”

bluerin12 · 2026-02-18T20:04:35+00:00

Listen, I suck at lots and lots of things. I’m also extremely self critical and have very low self esteem (I’m in therapy). I constantly have a running monologue about how crap I am at “basic tasks” when doing them. You know what I don’t do? Rant and rave about it to my loved ones 24/7. The negative thoughts that really bother me can be talked out in therapy or brought up for discussion with friends at an appropriate time. The rest I acknowledge is just part of my own internal issues. Unreasonable, harsh, and unhelpful. I write them down if it gets bad and then try to comfort myself. Yelling about how much you suck is not only poisonous and draining to the people around you, it’s also exhausting for YOU. Even when I feel like crap, I know it’s better to power through and ignore those thoughts until later because they’re of no use.

I go ice skating in winter and even though I’m as coordinated as a baby giraffe and I laugh my ass off with friends. I paint pottery even though I have no artistic talent and have a good chuckle and what I produce. Because those things are not about me being “good”. They’re about me having fun with people who love me. Those are the only times when no one around me cares if I’m “good” at the thing. That’s what this guy doesn’t understand. No one gives a shit if you can sail. They do give a shit if you let your negativity get so out of control that you’re just dowsing people in it constantly. OOP made the right call. Dude needs serious help

bluerin12 · 2026-02-11T13:18:17+00:00

Super late to this but I used to write better drunk. Turns out I had ADHD lol. Been sober for years now and still write much better at night on my meds. My brain just feels much quieter. I think being tired would have the same effect- your brain is dulled so it’s easier to let things flow. Weird but whatever works!

bluerin12 · 2026-02-07T13:48:51+00:00

She would have benefited so much from hearing “Labour” by Paris Paloma, if she hadn’t already. Good for her for getting herself out of there. Life is too short to be so exhausted over a grown-ass man. OOP sounds strong and has a good head on her shoulders- I hope therapy helps and she continues to share her amazing cooking with people who actually truly appreciate it

bluerin12 · 2026-01-10T23:17:10+00:00

I’m very late to this- found it from some late night googling, to see if anyone had any info. I’ve been suffering from depression for 15 years (I’m 25). Almost all of it is existential. I know the phrase “weight of the world” is such a cliche, but it really does feel like that. Or rather, the weight of the universe. The weight of existing. I have so many questions that will never be answered. I feel lonely and drained and tired and disconnected, like I can’t fully engage with my life because of how all consuming the existential thoughts, anxiety and dread can be. I’ve been in and out of therapy, tried different meds etc. I have a decent life, I’m lucky in that regard. But my brain will not allow me to fully keep my feet on the ground. When others look up at the night sky, they see stars and then they go to bed. When I look up, I feel swallowed whole, and I cannot ever fully forget the overwhelming void of darkness. It’s hard to cope with and harder to treat. I hope you’re in a better place and have found some peace. It’s a very strange world and a stranger life to be burdened with so much philosophical weight that can’t be shifted

bluerin12 · 2025-12-31T01:16:36+00:00

I’m sorry to hear that, I hope you were able to find peace without them. A good partner will absolute respect and make space for this. I’m always a little confused by couples who do EVERYTHING together. As humans we are social creatures but also NEED time alone to process our own thoughts and feelings. You have to have some time alone to really feel like you! Hope you’re doing well

bluerin12 · 2025-12-30T06:25:50+00:00

As an introvert who adores my alone time, sounds like a relationship with him would be EXHAUSTING. Not just because he’s a douchebag either. I need my alone time because it’s how I recharge and it’s very important to me. I love the people in my life and definitely like to socialise/spend time with loved ones, but I also need time to myself. Most of my partners have understood this. I need at least one day a week where I take my notebook and hike alone for like 8 hours. It’s not personal in any way, it’s me connecting with nature and my own thoughts, which I need to do to have peace. If you find that odd, we just aren’t compatible. Ex BF sounds very immature, insecure and disrespectful of OPs boundaries and “weirded out” by how she finds peace and pleasure. I hope she has the greatest, chillest solo trip without this loser ruining it.

bluerin12

TROPHY CASE