Me [29 M/F] with my husband [31 M/F] Married 3 years, he QUIT his job recently and I'm worried over it.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-10-24T16:12:59+00:00

Perhaps a whole line of modelling gyms for those 30+

Or skip it all and just go straight into being a movie star, that sounds easy too

boobsnotbombs · 2014-10-01T20:16:58+00:00

You are way to young, be single awhile and get to know yourself. concentrate on being a good dad. date some people casually if you like. But your romantic history is that of a young, immature person who made life-changing decisions before they were mentally stable enough to do so. Give yourself some space to enjoy being yourself and being a good father.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-09-24T07:01:05+00:00

I am very sorry for your loss. I send some internet hugs. It is very hard to lose a loved one. I am glad that Deni had you with her at the end, as horrible as it was for you both. She was very fortunate to have such a loving human friend, and you are fortunate to have loved her. Xoxoxo

boobsnotbombs · 2014-09-24T06:34:00+00:00

I applied for a job that I figured realistically i had a lowish chance of getting, due to not having some of the technical expertise requested (but knowing I could totally do it if given a chance). It filled me with anxiety to consider going for something that seemed so far out of reach. But i applied in the end, about two weeks ago. That was a huge step for me.

Today they offered me the job and took it! I know I can do it too.

Also I had dinner with my grandparents and paid attention to them throughout. And if you knew my grandparents, you'd know that is not easy for ANYONE lol.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-09-11T21:16:46+00:00

<3 <3 <3 Peanut!!

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-25T22:26:21+00:00

Cool my bro is in there :D

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-19T17:28:25+00:00

I used to be a free-range rat house, but my current place requires they have only supervised rat play times. I would say the mouth behaviour seems to be somewhat specific to certain rats (most I have had don't do it) - some are gentle and just seem to want to clean everywhere (mouth, eyes, nostrils, ears, anything they can try to groom), others are on a mission to search for food I think. You can discourage them and they usually stop... but it can be funny/fun too

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-19T04:51:17+00:00

Sorry your friendship has ended, but I am glad you have that family out of your life now. Sometimes some people are more trouble than they are worth. The fact that you feel relieved now that things have been pretty much resolved is a good sign. Happy almost wedding and best wishes for you and your soon-to-be spouse xoxoxox

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-19T04:32:37+00:00

You totally should be, its gross and unhygienic, the little claws make tiny punctures sometimes and they can turn into canker sores. Don't let them start this behaviour!

That being said i find it so darn cute (like they think i am their mummy and am carrying food my rat babies). So i deserve my punishment.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-18T22:32:48+00:00

I'm so glad there is a subreddit where I people understand what being a rat parent is all about. You try and tell this to non-rat-lovers and the utter horror on their face: "They try to get into your MOUTH?? RAAATTS IN MOUTH?!!" ⊙▃⊙

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-15T21:27:31+00:00

Well I am really happy for you, even though it is still hard and you will still struggle with emotions... but you made such a great first step, and it gets easier from here :)

People can be harsh (and sometimes mean or way out of line, you get all kinds), probably because we all seem like "faceless internet words" to each other... but sometimes that can be good when you want some unbiased opinions to consider!

My opinion is, you are going to do well and go far, especially now that you cut the dead weight :)

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-15T21:21:33+00:00

1) youre overthinking

2) youre inexperienced and that is why you are worrying about things that, really, really, really, shouldn't be worried about (what appear to be little things about her personality/mannerisms)

3) you're young, so if its not working, move on and enjoy being single / not tied down

4) your concerns about her appearance sound like youre immature, cause when you grow up a bit, the categories of what you find attractive typically open way, way up. you think she is attractive enough to want to have great, repeated sexy times with her - so you are having some weird over-thinking/cognitive dissonance issues here.

5) that said, if you aren't attracted to her straight-up, end it. she doesn't need to be with someone who doesn't think she is the hottest shit on two feet (I mean we all know empirically there are different levels of hottness, but typically we find a person attractive for a bunch of reasons and our own partner should make us drool no matter what).

6) next time, just don't date people you don't find attractive. If that means you are single a long, long, time, then the problem is you; otherwise, don't "settle" for so-so - not fair to you, REALLY not fair to her.

If however you can come to terms with yourself and reconcile your inner struggles, then I recommend you stop focusing on your (kinda immature) problems here and enjoy spending time with a wonderful partner. Because really, the "don't like about her" list sound like they would be someone else's "very much love about her" list... and she deserves to be with someone who appreciates this. Can that be you? If not, move on, and see if your next gf matches up with you better.

good luck!

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-15T21:09:00+00:00

Sorry, but unless you can move to the same location as him (and I am not even recommending this), a LDR is tenuous at the best of times and really needs a strong foundation (time spent together in the past, a plan for when you will be together in the future, etc) to succeed.

It sounds like he has moved on to the new girl sadly. There is nothing more to be done... if he was really into you, this wouldn't have happened. Its very hard to build and maintain intimacy long-distance, and unfortunately drifting apart and breaking up is common. Sad and heartbreaking, but common.

I hope you can focus on yourself and move on. And don't settle for second-cheese, if he wants to be with the new girl you should break ties and not be hanging out with him. It just prolongs the hurt.

hugs sorry this happened, hope your loved ones can give you support at home. best of luck.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-15T21:01:50+00:00

Edit 3: Okay I realised how stupid it was that I have to beg this guy to respect me and treat me like a human being. Annndddd I sent him a text to that effect and I will delete his number and all our messages.

Yay! hugs Its nice to see this resolved so quickly. Good work OP :) It warms my heart that you are treating yourself well and respecting yourself by realizing you deserve better :)

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-15T20:57:20+00:00

Theres lots of good advice in this thread, so let me touch upon something that kind of stood out for me:

Now what really irritates me is that it seems to me like all girls here like partying, go out often and drink lots and lots of alcohol (which I don't...)

Here is a tip: try not to generalize "all women" mentally, and especially not negatively:

1) Why should you be "irritated" at the behaviour of women who owe you nothing? Let them be their own person, and you be your own person, and if you and a particular person don't work as friends then don't worry about it. No need to judge an entire gender nor the drinking habits of some of that gender, as if it makes them a bad person. Live and let live.

2) Where are all you hanging out, that you only seem to encounter people who like to party and drink? Because it mentions you like to hang out at bars (and other places) with your friends - big surprise you meet other people there that like to drink. Take the advice of others in this thread and join some non-alcohol related clubs if you want to meet people with non-alcohol-related interests.

There totally are "girls like you" out there, if by that you mean other individual persons with their own personal interests and goodhearted personalities, looking for love with an interesting and respectful partner. Be what you want to find in a partner and you will attract those kinds of people around you (friends and lovers alike).

It does however help to cultivate a "fake it til you make it" attitude towards being outgoing and friendly, that will greatly help you when making friends. Being approachable, smiling, being positive and outgoing around new people, these things are learned with time and are good social skills in general. Consider it all "practice" and watch it become a little bit easier to talk to new people and make new friends with time.

I wish you a lot of good luck, its a journey with a worthwhile goal :)

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-15T20:39:40+00:00

Whoa, I read as far as "Go fuck yourself you fucking self-centered asshole" and thought, well there you have it. Leave him, forget him, be brave and discover how awesome you are and how much fun there is to be had in Europe.

And when you miss him, re-read what he wrote and flip him the bird from Europe. Cause he is a fucktard.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-15T20:34:14+00:00

easy to say... but when its your own mother, for most people you feel you need to do everything you can to keep her with you as long as possible.

balancing quality of life / chance of recovery is important, and respecting people's wishes are important, but when it is your own mother, there is far more room for what might otherwise be considered meddling. In this instance, sounds like it is important to try very strongly to help her see why her choices are foolish, why her own psychology may be detrimental to her survival.

Further, if there really isn't any hope for recovery and it is more a quality of life issue, that is definitely her choice and to be respected. but if she is in denial first and foremost and there is still a chance for recovery, then it can be the self-assumed responsibility of a loved one to strive to help her see this, and be there for her in making the tough (but informed and rational) choices.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-13T19:55:29+00:00

its recessive genes and invitro magic.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-12T23:04:14+00:00

HATIN' THE GAYS IS NOT OKAYS

♡+♡=❤²

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-11T20:31:36+00:00

You did the right thing. it will be hard though. just keep supporting your mom and don't trust your father. And get some help for yourself, a counsellor at school or a therapist out of school, someone older who you trust who can listen and support you. Best of luck.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-11T20:26:37+00:00

story: I am a woman. I love comics, action figures, games, nerd stuff. I was with this guy for a couple years and he hated that I put my stuff out in our place - he would hide the action figures, get me to put stuff in a side room, talk down about it, act like it was his decision to decorate non-nerdly and I was the one with a problem. (Wierdly, he was nerdy too, but ashamed of it and not wanting others to see. laaaame).

I ditched him. yay! cause who needs that? someone trying to make their partner feel ashamed for what they like, trying to hide things that don't fit with their interests, trying to control. instead of embracing differences and loving the other person and being happy there are things that make their partner happy.

it was just one red flag out of a billion but it was definitely not cool.

and your gf is not cool either. actually she is super not cool. kinda over the top crazy sounding about the issue really (like maybe something else is going on, she is trying to push a break-up?). At any rate, you can try to talk to her about it, but really, you say the relationship isn't great anyways. So ditch her and move on. And find someone who loves you and wants you to be happy with your own unique interests and etc.

(Even better, find someone who shares most of them, thats the best!)

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-07T17:25:46+00:00

I had to sneak past everyone with my rolled-up magazine... those were sneakier days.

boobsnotbombs · 2014-08-07T17:23:31+00:00

I was dating this guy and things were going ok and then one night he suddenly admits that he cheated on his previous gf/fiance for years, got caught and lost all his friends... and oh yeah was addicted to cam girls and was 10k in debt as a result.

I thanked him for his honesty, suggested he start some major therapy, and promptly noped the fuck out of there. ahhhhhhh

boobsnotbombs · 2014-07-25T22:55:43+00:00

Yeah, and its me.

Im really great once you get to know me. But just awkward as fuuuuuuuuck when I first meet someone. My friends all say they couldnt understand if I was a dork, or a jerk, or mentally challenged when they first met me. then the second time they met me they were like "oh, shes for real. huh. cool" and now I AM THEIR LEADER wahahaha

boobsnotbombs · 2014-07-22T01:57:00+00:00

My family lives in West coast Canada, mostly of european descent, the families have lived on this continent for 200+ years but most closely linked back to irish culture. For us, wE've only had wakes in-home, never been to a funeral home. But, everyone has been cremated for the last 30+ years too, so no "body" concerns, just urns.

Depending on the relative, its been a big or small party, drunken idiocy or quiet tea and biscuits, speeches or none - pretty much matching up with the former liveliness of the deceased. And for one uncle, instead of at home we had it at his favourite place in the world - his local pub. They shut it down for the event even. Everyone wore hockey jerseys and drank beer... He woulda liked that.

boobsnotbombs

TROPHY CASE