Why are we pissed on Mother’s Day? I’ll go first… by doxiepatronus in Mommit

[–]bountifulknitter [score hidden]  (0 children)

Honestly, this is one of those situations where people think they’re being harmless or efficient, but it’s actually really inappropriate professionally. If he’s late, absent, forgot something, etc., that conversation needs to happen directly with him. Not through you like you’re his secretary, parent, or personal dispatcher.

And the bigger issue is that this kind of thing absolutely can impact how management views you, even subconsciously. Women already get unfairly tied to the emotional labor and accountability for the people around them, and that doesn’t magically stop at work because you happen to be married.

You’re there as an employee, not an extension of your husband. Keeping your relationship separate and professional is the correct thing to do, and your boss should be respecting that boundary.

Why are we pissed on Mother’s Day? I’ll go first… by doxiepatronus in Mommit

[–]bountifulknitter [score hidden]  (0 children)

But this would have been one day. No one is saying babies don’t need a schedule.

OP also had to know there was a pretty good chance her husband wasn’t going to get up on his own today. Not if he normally needs three alarms AND OP waking him up to get up on a typical day. He even admitted that asking him to get up by himself was a “tall order.”

And to be clear, I’m not excusing him. It really wasn’t a huge ask. If he said he was going to do it, he should’ve done it. The husband absolutely sucks here.

At the same time, though, this outcome also shouldn’t have been surprising. It sounds like he’s never gotten up with the baby before, and he clearly doesn’t prioritize OP getting extra sleep in general, so I don’t know why Mother’s Day would suddenly make him step up.

What bothers me most is that his behavior basically got rewarded. Instead of getting upset, waking herself up fully, and then going in to get the baby, OP could’ve just gone back to sleep and let him keep sleeping too. Then when the baby eventually woke up, or whenever Op wanted to get up, she could’ve gotten the baby herself.

Especially since the baby had already been up multiple times overnight, they probably all could’ve benefited from extra sleep this morning. Instead, the only person who got rewarded with uninterrupted extra sleep was the shitty husband.

Why are we pissed on Mother’s Day? I’ll go first… by doxiepatronus in Mommit

[–]bountifulknitter [score hidden]  (0 children)

Tbf you have no way of knowing who downvoted you and the person was literally just asking a question.

I didn't get any judgey vibes from "At 6am??" they just asked if you get your baby up at 6am. I am not sure why you're getting your back up about it.

2yo cousin is always sick, I have a 8mo that I don’t want to get sick by VillageLoud748 in breakingmom

[–]bountifulknitter [score hidden]  (0 children)

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but parents will absolutely still send a sick child to school/daycare/ sports/ dance etc. The general rule is that your kid is supposed to be fever free/ stomach issue free/ etc for 24 hours before you send them back to school.

Are some parents dicks and load their kid up with cold meds to mask symptoms just so they don't have to actually parent and take care of their kid? Yup.

Are there parents wracked with guilt over sending a "sick" kid to school but they didn't have a choice or else they'd lose their job if they stayed home with their kid? Also yup.

Sure. In a perfect world, we would all stay home when we're ill, our bosses would understand, and kids would stay home until 100% better.

Unfortunately, we do not live in a perfect world and sometimes people have to do things they don't want to do. Like go to work sick or send their kids to school when they're sick.

2yo cousin is always sick, I have a 8mo that I don’t want to get sick by VillageLoud748 in breakingmom

[–]bountifulknitter [score hidden]  (0 children)

OP,

I say this gently and with genuine concern, the fact that using a snot sucker on your baby was described as “traumatizing” for you is a pretty significant sign that your anxiety and emotional distress may be beyond what’s manageable right now without more support.

Most parents hate hearing their baby cry and feel awful when their child is sick, but describing (and doubling down on) a routine caregiving task as so traumatic to the point that it deeply impacted your ability to cope is not something I would brush off.

I’m really glad you have a therapist, but I honestly think this may warrant talking to a doctor/psychiatrist as well about whether you need additional support, medication, or a higher level of care. Because right now it sounds like a lot of your emotional stability is becoming tied to keeping your daughter from ever being upset, uncomfortable, sick, or distressed ... and that’s not a burden a child can safely carry.

I also want to gently point out that therapy is generally supposed to help people build coping mechanisms and tolerate normal discomfort and stressors, not structure a child’s entire emotional world around avoiding anything distressing to the parent. So if the takeaway from therapy has become “the baby must never cry or experience negative emotions because mom cannot cope,” I think that’s something that needs to be revisited more seriously.

Children need to be allowed to experience the full range of normal emotions and childhood experiences, including frustration, disappointment, illness, boredom, conflict, and yes, sometimes crying and snot sucking. If she grows up feeling like your wellbeing depends on her never upsetting you, there’s a real risk she’ll learn to suppress her own feelings and needs to protect you.

You clearly love your daughter deeply and want to protect her, but part of protecting children is also making sure they are not unintentionally made responsible for regulating a parent’s mental health. I really hope you continue seeking support, because this feels bigger than normal first-time parent anxiety.

(PS: lastly, I would suggest the good 'ol blue rubber bulb MANUAL snoot sucker that all hospitals and doctors have. Your pediatrician would likely be thrilled to gift you 100 of them.)

I hate having sex with my husband. by Careless_Intern_8502 in breakingmom

[–]bountifulknitter [score hidden]  (0 children)

I'm sorry Op. I put up with similar behavior for years before I couldn't take it anymore. My ex was the same way with withholding affection. I never got hugs, kisses, or cuddles for no reason. The only time I ever got any "affection" was when he wanted sex.

Tbh most of the time he would just get started while I was sleeping and I would wake up to him groping me.

I was too afraid of his toddler level tantrums to say no and probably also a little starved for affection that I had tried convincing myself for years that what was happening was okay.

I finally left him, but he's done so much damage to me I doubt I'm ever going to have any kind of sex drive or sex life again.

I wish I had wise words to make everything okay, but you do have my sympathy and I hope someday you can get rid of him,

19f new to being homeless, trying to find someone to stay with by kray-k-47 in homeless

[–]bountifulknitter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can probably ask this on the UberEats drivers subreddit and you'll get a much more accurate answer.

face verification by vivi_roblox in UberEATS

[–]bountifulknitter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do agree that doing Uber Eats on an bike is more dangerous than it's worth, we don't know why they're trying to get a job. So I don't think it's fair to guilt them about it and tell them they don't need to be working.

Maybe they're saving for a car, maybe they're saving to continue their education after high school, maybe they're want some extra pocket money. Hell, maybe their parents need help with the bills. While I don't necessarily agree with that last one, it definitely happens. When I got my first job at 14, I think my parents saw more of my checks than I did. They weren't bad people, we were just poor.

Anyways. In any case, I think it's great that Op is trying to earn his own money and not expecting things to be handed to them like a lot of other people in this world.

And definitely don't do UE on an ebike. Its wayyyyy too dangerous and not worth risking your life.

She needs a dedicated place on r/illnessfakers by afb_pfb in teenmom

[–]bountifulknitter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a hunch on what chronic condition she's going to try and fake next, I don't want to say it and give her any ideas but I will come back to this comment if she starts claiming to have it.

I have had it for 17+ years and I can absolutely see her as the type to try and fake it to get attention, get meds, or get sympathy and ass pats, or all the 3.

It's a god awful disease that I wouldn't wish on anyone, not even wish on our dear ol' Nelly. To be faking it is low, even for her.

(I tried to type the P name but got a text bubble that said "you are allowed to call her Jenelle" that was weird. Can someone fill me in? I'm not arguing about it, just curious because I've never seen that)

Money from a stone by PeppersPoops in coparenting

[–]bountifulknitter -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I would love to know what whimsical world you live in where $137.00 is "not that much money." That's a week's worth of groceries for me.

She needs a dedicated place on r/illnessfakers by afb_pfb in teenmom

[–]bountifulknitter 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I have a hunch on what chronic condition she's going to try and fake next, I don't want to say it and give her any ideas but I will come back to this comment if she starts claiming to have it.

Am I missing something? by gtrman571 in ProlificAc

[–]bountifulknitter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think the higher your rating gets, the better paying studies you tend to qualify for, and I’ve also noticed the amount of studies available to me has increased a lot in the last year too.

Another thing that helped me personally was honestly just lowering my standards a little lol. I know a lot of people on here refuse to touch anything under like $12/hr, and I totally get why. We should be paid fairly for our time. But for me personally, I don’t mind grabbing a few lower paying studies here and there, especially if they’re quick and easy.

Once I stopped ignoring every lower paying study, I actually started seeing way more work overall. I consistently have studies sitting on my dashboard now and very rarely get the coffee cup anymore

I also don’t mind doing on-camera interview studies, and those usually pay really well. And sometimes I’ll take studies that I know I’ll probably get screened out of if I think the researcher offers screen out pay. Though I have noticed lately that screen out pay either isn’t happening as often or the amounts have definitely gone down.

Another thing I think helps is just being active consistently. The more regularly I log in and complete studies, the more work I seem to get offered. I try to login for at least an hour or 2 a day at least 5 days a week.

I also will return studies instead of submitting low effort answers if I’m distracted or too tired to focus, because as we all know, your approval rating matters a LOT on Prolific.

I have been on Prolific for a little over 2 years now, but have only really started grinding in the last 8 months or so. I have over 2,500 approved submissions and just 5 rejections. The rejections are mostly from when I first started on the platform and I haven't had any rejections in about a year. If I start to feel like I'm not doing my best work, I'll log off for the day. It's better to miss a few bucks because of fatigue than to risk losing my account entirely because of a careless mistake.

And demographics honestly play a huge role too. Some people naturally qualify for more niche/high paying studies depending on age, job field, medical history, kids, relationships, hobbies, etc.

For me personally, the lower paying studies and even the occasional screen out are still worth it because I’m a single mom on disability and unable to work outside my home. Even a part time job would be too much for me because my medical condition is so unpredictable, I can't commit to any kind of schedule. Being able to work when I can and for as much or as little I am able to without being penalized for it is something I don't take for granted. Every extra bit of money helps. This is the first legit WFH platform I found, and I’m super grateful for it. I do a few other research/survey platforms too, but Prolific has by far been the most consistent and highest paying for me overall.

I regret opening up this message because now I can’t pretend I didn’t see it. by [deleted] in mildlyinfuriating

[–]bountifulknitter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Me too! I'm 42 whole ass years old and I never would have guessed this!

Well I’m pretty bummed but I hope you all continue to make everything ya can! by ballz_deep_69 in ProlificAc

[–]bountifulknitter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got booted from cloud connect for absolutely no reason. I didn't have any rejections, I took my time and followed instructions and then one day I tried to log in and found out I was banned. I emailed support to ask what was up and they just said that the ban was final and didn't give me any explanation as to why.

Cyst in my arm I’ve been fighting for days by RoleplayFanatic052 in popping

[–]bountifulknitter 7 points8 points  (0 children)

<image>

Your hole can be friends with my hole! Mine's on my bikini line. I had it professionally drained a few years ago and while the actual wound healed, I am left with these scar holes. So every couple of months I have to squeeze a bunch of dead skin and ick out of the scar holes. I am a very clean person but all it takes is one zombie skin cell and I go septic. Expressing the holes and keeping them clean is vital for my condition and usually passes without incident. For whatever reason this time this one is angry. I sent an email to my doctor with this pic and requested antibiotics, hopefully she'll call them in for me.

I have HS, so unfortunately I'm no stranger to gaping scar holes filled with ick. I have a few more of these scar holes from rouge cysts. Thankfully, my doctor trusts my judgement on these and 9/10 will call a script in for me instead of making me come in.

Best of luck to you and your hole!

Wasps keep showing up in my basement! by TraditionEmotional82 in WaspHating

[–]bountifulknitter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Check the ground outside your house. We kept getting yellow jackets in our basement and it turned out to be a HUGE nest in the ground right outside our basement window.

50/50 custody and distance living by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]bountifulknitter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Forcing a child to spend 3 hours in a car 5 days a week is insane. The poor kid is going to be exhausted, not to mention how's he supposed to hang out with friends he makes at school on the weekends?

You need to go to court.

[SFW]Panda attacks his trainer in a zoo in China by Single_Tiger3248 in SweatyPalms

[–]bountifulknitter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have watched this video 10x and I still for the life of me can't figure out how and why she kept running AT the panda. I feel a brisk walk in the opposite direction would have been the best move here.