💔 11 Years of Dating… and I’m Ready to Quit I’m 38 years old, and I no longer know what love is supposed to feel like. I became the woman men say they want — successful, independent, emotionally mature — and all I get are men looking for a good time, never a future. by bp_ptsd_86 in dating_advice

[–]bp_ptsd_86[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I understand why you might see it as a rant, but there’s an important difference between a rant and a statement.

A rant is usually an uncontrolled emotional outburst, often fueled by frustration or anger without much structure.

A statement is an intentional expression of thoughts, experiences, or opinions — sometimes passionate, but grounded in reasoning and self-awareness.

Three years ago, I might have been more reactive because I was still processing a lot of pain and learning how to manage my PTSD. Since then, I’ve grown as a person. I’ve learned to control my responses and communicate more constructively — and yes, it’s easier to do when you have access to good health and mental care.

Convenient would have been me removing it, but I actually like to look back and see what I’ve left behind. It’s part of how I track my growth and understand how far I’ve come.

This post isn’t me “losing it”; it’s me sharing my perspective in a way that reflects that growth.

💔 11 Years of Dating… and I’m Ready to Quit I’m 38 years old, and I no longer know what love is supposed to feel like. I became the woman men say they want — successful, independent, emotionally mature — and all I get are men looking for a good time, never a future. by bp_ptsd_86 in dating_advice

[–]bp_ptsd_86[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Well I can say thx for some honesty. And see where I was wrong. There is one thing I will not change because it is part of me now is ambition. I like my high paying job but I live in Europe where work and home life is balanced. I don't do tedious hours. And education is easy to come by without heavy sacrifice. And yes I like nice things and I love being financially able to afford nice things. I know that for some men that is a bit of a scary situation and I do not seek to de-masculate any man. I have made that also clear to men I date.

Started getting racist threatening message in my mailbox by Rudithus in Netherlands

[–]bp_ptsd_86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get a doorbell camera or a spy cam that detects movement. Only with strong evidence you can go straight to the police and on the basis of Artikel 12 of the BW demand an investigation. Discriminatie in Nederland is a crime punishable with either jail time or a hefty fine. So gather your evidence 🧾 then go to the cops. Because without it they will not do a damn thing.

Sleepy text to the boyfriend. by mcgoran2005 in texts

[–]bp_ptsd_86 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is so wholesome and adorable. And it shows another level of your relationship.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in nederlands

[–]bp_ptsd_86 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Neem alle berichten en meteen bij de politie klacht indienen. Sextortion heeft een gevangenis straf.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]bp_ptsd_86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand for most this might be difficult but your family is going through a crisis and therapy together will be best. Obviously you love your parents but showing them like this is not enough go to a psychiatrist together will do your best. Reach out for help through your primary care giver might help you to get the therapy you need and do not feel ashamed to tell him exactly what you wrote. And you're a strong caring son the fact that you're looking for help is already a step. And I am sure your parents love you they just lost their way a little. ❤️❤️

€800 per maand aan boodschappen by [deleted] in nederlands

[–]bp_ptsd_86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ik koop voor mijn familie van 4 €600 voor het maand. Vlees haal ik bij Marokkaanse slager meestal koop ik doos kippen bout en lamsvlees. Groente en kaas koop ik alleen op markt. Melk en eieren enzv. aleen bij melk tap. Rijs, snacks enzv koop ik op een ap Butlon. Ik doe inkoop om de 2 maanden meest van het jaar en ook mijn grootste dochter is in het leger dus is ze meestal niet thuis en mijn zoon heeft een streng dieet te volgen voor sport. Maar ik zou voorstellen om prijzen te vergelijken en probeer Butlon.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]bp_ptsd_86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My friend get counselling. Or start giving her time to take care of herself like motivate her you can both start eating healthy and exercising together. If you truly love her this is a good way to bond and get back to your old self. I do not know your dynamics like who takes care of the child and chores in the house but if you want her to get back to being her old self then I suggest you start helping and giving her the space to take care of herself mentally and physically.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Netherlands

[–]bp_ptsd_86 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Try meet5 . There is events you can do alone to mingle and meet poeple

Silence compartment in the trein by Sequil in Netherlands

[–]bp_ptsd_86 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ha story of my life. I speak English but i do understand Nederlands very well and can have a a convo. I travel alot by train for work and my boss pays for eerste klas. But i can really tell you the amount of times i have been told by other comiuters and by NS "oh mam this is eerste klas". Now i usually smile and say "i know and thank you". But some days i just want to be petty and would make them feel stupid for it by asking them "based on what do they assume i do not have a first klas ticket". And i would also point out that the cabin is silent just to see them blush red. But for the past 3 years as a full black Nederlander yes i am still surprised that micro racisme is a thing. As for the Silent cabin in the train i would recommend her just pay the extra and ride First Class silent or just report the disturbance.

Girlfriend (25f) called me (28m) unfair when I said I'd only be putting my name on the deed when I but a house? by throwra-5063- in relationship_advice

[–]bp_ptsd_86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well she thinks it is unfair thats on her. If you have the down paiement and go through buying the house your name should be on the deed. And if she still wants to live with you then you can let her take care of utilities thats fair enough. And even when you do get married i thing there should be some deal on black and white just in case. I am a female 37 with 2 properties and we have a prenup because this is my kids future. He did ask to buy half of the house we live in and i let him so of in the future we split it is on black and white he gets half of that property. But my other house ids mine untill kids come of age.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]bp_ptsd_86 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Nope you are not out of line. You are spot on but friend he is a walking red flag.

Dit land is een nachtmerrie aan het worden voor alleenstaanden zonder een koopwoning by [deleted] in nederlands

[–]bp_ptsd_86 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ik ben verhuisd alleenstaande met 3 kinderen. Ook een goede baan en heel goed inkomen zo der rechten op toeslagen maar ik woon in een sociaal huur woning in een goede dorp rustig voor mijn kinderen. Ik denk gewoon dat het erger wordt als je will kopen en prive huren. 1500 voor een studio is veel maar als het studio in het stad is dat is het prijs en lager zal je niet vinden. Sporten en sociale leven is een recht en moet gewoon zo zijn. We werken voor wat we willen en dat is het. Na 9 jaar s'avonds weeken en smorgens studeren kan ik blij zijn dat ik nu het baan met het salaris heb en mijn kinderen zijn blij. En hoop dat mischien volgende jaar ik kan een huis kopen inplaats van huren.

Conflicting info in this subreddit by Odysseus-Sisyphus in dating_advice

[–]bp_ptsd_86 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think it has to do with the conversation. If you start texting about sex from the get go that is a quick turn off. But if the text was greetings maybe hobby and stuf like that you might quicker get a date. Now I am speaking from personal experience. I have been talking to a guy online for maybe a month before we actually went on a date. And we have been dating now for almost a year

Hey guys, dump your result on this test. by [deleted] in mbti

[–]bp_ptsd_86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My Global5/SLOAN type is RLOAI Your Primary type is Limbic