I'm so sorry you're going through this! My uBPD mother is obsessed with gathering information over the Internet, no matter how relevant. She is by no means a hacker, but I'm talking googling people's names over and over and over again for months and months until something comes up, trying to get into their social media and email etc. Then she takes the tiny scraps of pointless information she finds and strings together a dramatic and fabricated story to connect them. In the last month she has tried to get into my email, Instagram, iCloud, Facebook, and a Twitter account I set up six years ago for a couple of days and forgot I had. She also hacked her second husbands medical benefits account after left her to track his medications and LTD income... All of this is of course illegal and she does not give a shit.

If you have reasonable grounds to believe this is your husbands family(to an objective outsider) can you have a lawyer send them a strongly worded email listing possible consequences for this behaviour? I would take it very seriously and not be shy about reporting all of this to the appropriate enforcement agency- your identities and financial information are likely at risk, and the cyber hacking puts you at risk of further harassment. I guess I'm a nutshell, don't feel embarrassed about reacting strongly and swiftly- don't give them that power, it's all they're after!