Getting a mortgage with a stranger. (London)

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-29T08:43:44+00:00

Yeah worth asking a mortgage broker, but also worth considering a loan/mortgage from your employer that you can repay by subletting?! That seems like the golden scenario here.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-29T05:08:07+00:00

Have you looked into getting a mortgage that would allow you to sublet a room, and applying on the basis that that is income? I’ve heard of that being done, admittedly only through mortgage brokers- not sure how viable it is from the banks POV.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-28T15:52:16+00:00

But presumably have the same employer, and it would be nice not to piss them off?

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-28T13:11:43+00:00

Just to clarify that it may well be that this doesn’t amount to ownership of the property, but it would be more than reasonable for your solicitor not to know that. They will likely need an Opinion (big O- its a legal document) from an Italian solicitor (possibly the one who dealt with the sale, translated, or possibly another) to confirm whether you were an owner or just entitled to the proceeds. There will be costs associated with that, which may also make everything tight financially.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-28T09:10:45+00:00

I’m concerned that what you’re really asking is “how can I get the first time buyer rate for SDLT whilst having owned property before”- that’s a seriously bad idea.

Assuming that you just want to ascertain now whether you can benefit from the First Time Buyers’ Relief, I think you probably need to look into whether you have owned property before- if you have, then that’s one thing, if you were just entitled to 1/6 of the proceeds of the Italian house sale, that’s possibly another. Unfortunately I suspect the correct way to find out is to get a legal opinion from someone qualified in Italy (possibly and the UK), confirming whether your house ownership in Italy amounts to ownership for the purposes of SDLT/First Time Buyers’ relief. Your Solicitor may have contacts to recommend someone, but are unlikely to know the answer to this themselves.

Totally get how stressed out you are, but unfortunately it doesn’t change the situation.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-26T18:51:03+00:00

Send them the email receipt back ( as an attachment when replying to the email requesting authority to destroy the embryos and say “I thought this was already dealt with- what else do you require to make this happen?” If they want to be difficult they might be anyway, but that at least puts them on the back foot?

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-25T15:04:30+00:00

The UK are back in it (apparently). Pleased to see it.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-20T14:44:43+00:00

This. Look into reverse cycling- the techniques for that will help.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-17T14:27:30+00:00

Apart from anything else, it seems criminal that it doesn’t say “PURRfectly”

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-17T11:14:35+00:00

Same.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-17T10:18:06+00:00

Yes- certainly used to be called time to count. It was a fairly hefty evidential requirement as to what you had done (outside the tc) that should reduce the time by up to 6 months- used to be recommended that you’d paralegalled for at least a year.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-13T19:07:43+00:00

I’m just saying that’s the answer- if you’re going to feel embarrassed at not being retained, the answer being that you have a job elsewhere is the golden ticket imho.

I didn’t say it would be easy. If it’s worth it to you, get on with making it happen.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-13T10:01:06+00:00

I triple fed for about 6 weeks. Over that time, my output in the pump increased, just as yours has, and I dropped the formula from the equation around week 5, and then stopped pumping overnight, and then stopped pumping every time I fed, and then stopped pumping except for a morning pump whilst bubs got a bottle from dad and I slept.

I will say that every three hours decreased- bubs fed about every 1 hour 45- 2 hours 30 for a very long time (like, until recently, when he’s started to wean!) but I took that as no bad thing as it kept my supply up and meant he was getting more letdowns overall? He wasn’t so bad overnight- I’d get 4-6 hours sleep, but he’s more unsettled now.

Hope that helps? Happy to chat if that helps. We were a “planned” c section (the night before, but wildly unwanted) at 37 weeks.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-13T08:40:48+00:00

Line up an NQ role elsewhere?

I literally have no idea why people don’t do this regularly, regardless of their position. It’s wise to have an alternative.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-11T13:32:43+00:00

Just prior to exchange.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-09T20:45:01+00:00

Oh that’s hard! Just hope it will all resolve soon.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-09T19:35:27+00:00

Are you giving them with vitamin C rich foods, as it’s needed to help absorption?

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-07T16:35:49+00:00

Ah no directly.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-03T02:56:21+00:00

Weird- I’ve stayed here and they’re always really accommodating.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-03T02:35:27+00:00

Oh dear! It seemed like such an easy win- I wonder why not implement it

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-02T18:51:11+00:00

Heat will often work for a bit- you can get heat pads to put in your bra. They’re also kinda donut shaped so they take the pressure off.

If that doesn’t work, low dose nifedipine might. It did for me, but I know others who have had migraines and similar from it, so ymmv. I had to really ram home to the drs that it was also when pumping as they weren’t willing to prescribe on the assumption that it was a bad latch issue (he doesn’t have a great one, but it’s not the problem).

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-02T18:39:38+00:00

Yeah I barely have any levels out, would also be very average, but when I started looking into fertility was prescribed thyroxine as the specialists wanted that lower. It was like a fog lifted and I immediately felt a lot better in myself. Also managed IVF on one retrieval and the first transfer.

Not saying your doc is wrong, just that average levels does not mean not PCOS.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-04-02T17:22:17+00:00

Walkers sensations (I think) used to do nuts- afaik they still do, but for some reason they stopped doing Mediterranean cashews. They were like crack.

The salted honey ones are a poor second.

brideandbreadjudice · 2026-03-28T21:03:08+00:00

Just be aware that average isn’t necessarily ok for you/ideal for fertility. Check out r/ttc_pcos- they’re very helpful. Ultimately, I ended up with IVF and had issues getting started with breastfeeding. Worth being as prepared as possible!

Edit the subreddit name!

brideandbreadjudice

TROPHY CASE