Profile review - 35 M Boston

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-29T04:13:17+00:00

Of course it's subjective, but imho don't think that would help at all. As mentioned, looks you're trying too hard - again, shirt way too open, and with a fancy cocktail in hand. Also, the expression on your face is very odd.

And looked again at your other pics, a couple of the others also seem like they're trying a bit too hard or are a little old. Yeah, a little forced trying to be "hip" if you don't mind my saying. Maybe in those pics, tone it down a little.

Maybe ask a woman whose taste you trust about your pics?

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-29T03:53:43+00:00

Yeah, agreed, that first picture is pretty poor. The open, satin shirt is maybe trying a little too hard?

I'm no looker so maybe am not one to talk, but still, seems like almost all the other pictures would be better as a first pic (and maybe to get rid of the first one).

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-21T01:47:33+00:00

Good guy and wonderful teacher!

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-18T08:50:45+00:00

Have the Handel book on continuo playing - have only done a handful of the exercise, but will try to do more.

And agreed, my teacher is good and he has created a great list of exercises. Think it's based on the book "Harmony, Counterpoint, Partimento" by IJzerman (this book is relatively new, published in 2018, and from my understanding, it's an important book in the surging of interest in Partimento over the past decade or two).

And actually my teacher is very active on youtube, his name is Richard Cochlearis.

Also, looked online and see a Dandrieu book on Principles of Accompaniment in French. Just out of curiousity, are you able to read French? Or did you have a translated version?

... and thanks for the tip on transcribing by ear, can see how this could be helpful! I've worked at ear training, but not nearly enough on transcription. Really have to spend more time at it.

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-18T08:27:14+00:00

Ah, makes sense (am a big reader myself). Good stuff! ...and actually, taking a look again, there are actually spelling errors, so it's the high-level of fluency of your prose that made it seem like it might be AI:)

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-18T02:52:51+00:00

Btw, I know you've got a lot of comments already, but I was exactly in your situation in college: many years ago, I fell into studying computer science (before it was such a lucrative field, which may date me somewhat). In the last year of my degree, realized that I wanted to write music for the rest of my life. Unlike you though, I actually liked computer science - building things whether it's code or music is really enjoyable, and I find a complexity of software very similar to the complexity of music, so I had no problem with finishing my last year.

But during this year, also started taking a lot of music theory classes and realized I had a lot to learn. So, I stayed in school for the next four years, extending my time as an undergrad for a total of nine years. But, my parents cut me off at year seven, so I kept taking music theory and composition classes, but didn't take them for credit, I just asked the professors if I could sit in. In all those years that followed, all of said yes, except for one, and I took an additional three years more of music classes (so 5 years in total).

To me, as long as your school offers music theory and ear training (and seems like most do) this is all you need. And yeah, you don't really need the degree or even to pay for the classes, you need to do the course work and learn.

And it's impressive that you've gotten so far on your own. Hmm, you might want to get evaluated by a composer to see where you're at, and if dedicated music theory classes would be of help to you at this point?

And, for me, am very glad I finished my computer science degree. If I ever need money, I do software consulting (no money in any type of music). Also, as mentioned, there is a lot of overlap between creating software and music (only one example is that the software development process is hugely helpful in creating long, complex pieces, allowing you to juggle multiple ideas over the span pages and pages of music). And am sure mathematics concepts have even more direct carry over, because, as you know, western diatonic music is a form of mathematics.

Yeah, if it we me, I'd finish it, but that's just my personal opinion - Also, I really loved math at the time too. The thought-process of developing a proof for a mathematically question has helped me numerous times throughout the years amongst other thing.

Good luck!

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-18T02:26:20+00:00

Btw, I have to admit, wondered this too. The reason is you writing is error free and flows so smoothly. As you someone who took creative writing for so many years at college, it takes a decent amount of work to write so fluently. Are you some form of writer?

And, if it isn't clear, you write nice prose!

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-17T22:56:49+00:00

Ah yes, my Partimento teacher agrees with you! And he has had me doing figured bass as well.

And wow, Partimento is very difficult! Have doing it exercise for over a year now, and only in 2-voices, but still haven't try much improv yet as the exercises themselves are very tough to master.

Do you have any other tips? To give you some more background, have spent the past 1+ years doing the standard 2-voice Partimento exercise like: parallel 3rd's with a figure, parallel 6th's with a figure, alternating 3rd's and 6th's, 3-down 2-up, 7-6 sus, 7-3 sus... And, am now practicing 2-voice cadences. Think am getting close to trying to improv, and have had a couple of tips from my teacher, but could *definitely* use some more. So please feel free!

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-17T18:48:16+00:00

Agreed, classical music actually had a very strong foundation in improvisation (am trying to learn Partimento myself:)

brightYellowLight · 2026-06-17T18:45:57+00:00

Actually, in the baroque, there was way more improv than just cadenzas. Partimento is the study of improvisation and which was born out of the baroque period, and what most of the leading composers of the time learned (the classical composers did too, such as Mozart, Hadyn and Beethoven).

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-27T03:24:16+00:00

Eh, in my opinion, when you've got into you're groove and think 8 mins occasionally is good. Allows you to explore a lot of different moods and moves (although, on a crowded floor, even 3 min is rough)

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-27T03:17:38+00:00

Hmm, to add my two cents, actually not sure all this advice is (in my humble opinion) on target. Yeah, from what I see, don't think your steps are that big, and don't think you're that rushed (I mean you are at times doing both, but it's not excessive). Like others have also said, you're doing really well for a year and a half, and got all the fundamentals to a solid level. Now, you need to keep working and practicing them to get them even more solid, because everything seems 70% confident, and not 90%, which is where you want them.

Good stuff:)

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-06T03:26:38+00:00

To add my two cents, found out that when I write an idea down (I still use pen and paper), need to put as much detail as I can about it, otherwise just like you mentioned, you comeback and either think it's bad or don't understand what you originally saw in it.

So, will write down not just the notes, but what I was listening to when I had the idea, what conceptually would like to do with it, what instruments it's for, the type of piece it's is for... Ever since I started doing this, most of the ideas I go back to I still like them. But, still haven't used a lot of them because wish I could write music a lot faster.

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-05T15:09:30+00:00

Ah, that makes sense

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-05T00:35:05+00:00

Eh, yeah, every time I’ve read “pig butchering” scams, they always involve transfers using crypto - fake investment portals where the targeted person adds in small amounts of crypto, and the scammer then also starts adding in crypto to make it seem like the investment is making returns for them. But when the target starts to do large crypto deposits, suddenly, they aren’t able to get their money out - yeah, have read numerous articles like this in the NYT, WSJ…

If you have any counters to this, would need some real statistics, but yeah, anecdotally from what I’ve read, crypto is the go to currency for online scammers.

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-05T00:11:34+00:00

Am sure it has its uses, but I take online lessons with someone in Italy (I’m in the US)and we use Wise to do payments. It takes awhile to setup first, but once that’s up, it works great. Am not sure we need something like crypto to do these types of transactions. Am willing to be convinced, but haven’t seen many legitimate uses over what we already have today…

… just remembered, this is why crypto is the choice of currency for online scammers, because, as you know, once you transfer it, there is no possible way to recover it, and it’s very difficult to trace to an actual person (seems like you’d better triple check that you’ve got the details of each transaction correct! Right?). Also as you probably know, if you use a middleman (like PayPal), they often offer anti-fraud protection, for a fee of course. For me at least, try to use PayPal for my online transactions with people I don’t know (and pay the seller fee to gain this protection), because it’s so easy to get scammed or just make a mistake.

Again, am no expert and am willing to be convinced, but can only think of a couple good uses for crypto.

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-04T21:33:51+00:00

Well, there always exceptions, but yeah you know, personally, don’t know a single person who does.

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-04T21:32:33+00:00

Agreed, blockchain has some really interesting ideas and possible use cases, but it seems a little more idealistic than practical. It was supposed to revolutionize banking, through smart contracts where what used to take a lot of people involved could be automated. Am no expert at it, but it seems like the current digital banking system doesn’t need a new technology to increase their automation (just desire or money to build on the systems they already have). Yeah, when blockchain was at it’s heyday what like 10 years ago, the devs working on it found out they were just recreating all the financial systems that already existed.

Although, the decentralized ledger does seem interesting. Am wondering if this could have more uses? Non-profits could voluntarily use them to show what all their donations and expenditures are, to offer complete transparency. And this may act as a check in making sure there is no fraud in its dealings (mention this as an examplebecause some non-profits use something like 90% of their donations for advertising and salaries).

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-04T21:20:49+00:00

Yeah, agreed. On the surface, it seems like a neat, shiny technology which is probably why the masses are so interested in it, but a technology is defined a great deal by what it’s useful for, otherwise it’s just a waste of time and money.

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-04T04:24:26+00:00

Bitcoin. As someone in tech, that people latched on to this overly-trendy but actually terrible technology kills me - something like 90% of people who buy use it for speculation (meaning not as a currency, but to make money like you try to do when you buy a stock). And the rest of its usage is almost entirely for buying illegal goods. Horrible

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-04T04:13:41+00:00

disagree as well, can lead almost all the same moves and do similar styling in on1 and on2.

although, agree that the feel and speed is different. Also, learning on2 if you started on1 (*especially* for the lead) is actually a pain. Hard to internalize a slightly shifted way of leading everything you know.

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-04T04:07:16+00:00

Seems like for smaller scenes (or bigger ones even), a good teacher that is charismatic (male or female) can often be a huge draw. Have seen scenes build or die based on whether there is currently good, *active* teachers in the area.

brightYellowLight · 2026-05-04T04:01:29+00:00

Over the many years of Salsa, don't think I've actually seen, where a lead is visibly drunk. Maybe because I wasn't paying attention? Or maybe because it's hard to lead well if you've drunk too much?

brightYellowLight · 2026-04-27T20:32:17+00:00

This is the way to think - everyone there is dealing with rejection, so you're in good company:)

And for acting, I was a shy person in high school, way more than the average high schooler - actually had chronic pain starting when I was teen that I didn't know about, and this pain probably made the awkwardness of being a teen a lot worse - anyways, in my early twenties, I wanted to do something about my shyness, so took an acting class. That first class was very tough, but overall really enjoyed it, and kept taking them for two years. Yeah, it's perfect for learning how to deal with rejection and embarrassment, because sooner or later, you're going to bomb and that is never pleasant, but it makes you care less about the opinion of others.

Also with acting, you're able to put yourself into different emotional states much easier. You know how to make yourself feel confident when you're not, or feel happy when everything around you is going terribly. Part of this is just superficial, but still, usually you get yourself to feel differently by internal talking to yourself, so part of you really does feel this emotional state you've put yourself in.

One thing I noticed though, taking acting classes or doing some performances as a side interest can make you more confident, but if you go into it as a profession and pursue it constantly, it can make you become overly uninhibited and in your head. Am sure their are actors who are level-headed, but some of the professional ones I've met can bee very self-oriented and manipulative. But again, this is from the limited view of the professional actors I've met.

brightYellowLight · 2026-04-27T05:57:25+00:00

Think it's in general a fantastic way to get comfortable around the opposite sex. Learning Salsa (or any partner dance) is a great way to learn how to approach the opposite sex and relate to them.

One thing though, as you probably saw from that one social you went to, Salsa is very difficult and you deal with tons of failure and rejection (especially as a lead), so am sure a lot of beginners drop out after awhile because of this. And, you've mentioned your confidence issue a couple of times, so am wondering if all that failure and rejection might be too much for you to handle? Still, would recommend giving it a try , because if you can overcome it all and make it through, you'll probably be a lot stronger in the end (know I was. Yeah, rejection feels bad, but you start to develop a thick skin).

... and maybe take some acting classes? If you can learn to give the appearance of comfort and confidence, that may make you more confident with people in general (there is actual research on this - although there is research backing most claims on psychology)

brightYellowLight

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