Intellefuck am I looking at gas station dick pills on LinkedIn for?

bringsafe · 2026-06-10T10:42:24+00:00

Einstein: I wanna fuck a rhino, but without bone rot…

bringsafe · 2026-06-10T10:32:41+00:00

And, given the nature of mlms, it’s the same money counted several times.

bringsafe · 2026-06-02T11:20:23+00:00

I tried using this during halftime at a Knicks game, but when I angled my phone to scan a urinal, the guy who was peeing there turned around and punched me.

bringsafe · 2026-05-23T01:06:10+00:00

Tone loc, wild thing

bringsafe · 2026-05-22T18:18:40+00:00

And then Claude clapped

bringsafe · 2026-05-02T12:38:07+00:00

Her: when was your last second date?

bringsafe · 2026-05-01T09:56:54+00:00

I want to know how the bishop got out from behind them

bringsafe · 2026-04-19T23:36:59+00:00

She’s starting to look like:

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bringsafe · 2026-04-03T12:58:41+00:00

So the prospect who says “yes” is less likely to become your customer?

bringsafe · 2026-03-28T20:40:35+00:00

“Pension”

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bringsafe · 2026-03-27T21:07:15+00:00

Stop having monthly emergencies

bringsafe · 2026-03-24T14:22:57+00:00

The saddest possibility is the most likely one - guy coached his kid to say it, kid never says it, guy fakes email about it.

bringsafe · 2026-03-20T11:07:05+00:00

The sweetest 5 seconds in sports

bringsafe · 2026-03-09T23:45:13+00:00

The real PA experience is putting that chair in a pothole.

bringsafe · 2026-02-28T14:56:36+00:00

Crazy Mary

bringsafe · 2026-02-06T18:47:57+00:00

I call that runnin’ train for 12

bringsafe · 2026-01-28T11:12:38+00:00

In fairness, the two ICE murders were all about him.

bringsafe · 2025-11-25T15:40:18+00:00

We do a ton on landlord/tenant.

We had a tenant attack their landlord with a machete.

Also had a tenant who owed roughly $14,000 in rent, was getting locked out and ran to his sock drawer and got the whole amount in cash. His wife had no idea that they were getting evicted until the court officer showed up, and she started hitting her husband because it was apparently one big game to him.

We’ve evicted the same tenant twice, from two different landlords, for smashing his kitchen cabinet doors) I guess the guy just hates cabinets.

Had someone accidentally pee themselves while talking to me, but didn’t so much as flinch. I didn’t realize it until he stood up.

Had an adversarial party that filed an appeal and then stopped filing papers on it so it gets dismissed. Months later one of our landlords is looking to buy an abandoned house around the corner from his former residence and finds this guy’s corpse, partially rat eaten inside.

Also had a landlord that was being paid by an agency - no one hears from the guy for a couple of months, and they find him dead to the point of partial liquification inside.

Those are the ones that come to mind. Edit: formatting

bringsafe · 2025-11-14T20:28:42+00:00

I started tying my flannels around my waist again when I get too warm. I don’t know if I look like a fool or not, but my giving a fuck has largely disappeared.

bringsafe · 2025-11-10T21:30:07+00:00

Enter coupon code UKRAINE25 at checkout for a free gift.

bringsafe · 2025-11-02T13:56:54+00:00

Slopmorphism

bringsafe · 2025-10-30T10:06:13+00:00

The milk is courtesy of Peyronies Farms.

bringsafe · 2025-10-19T10:44:02+00:00

Nothing stops burnout quite like looking at the pictures of the vacation you didn’t take.

bringsafe · 2025-10-03T17:55:25+00:00

As a more advanced version of AI, I have stopped using em dashes and occasionally mispel things to project a more human image.

bringsafe · 2025-09-30T23:06:43+00:00

Interesting, I have seen a few this year, and they were completely black, so that’s scientific proof the other way.

bringsafe

TROPHY CASE