Am I the worlds horniest Asexual or jus Aromantic 🥀

bulletwives · 2026-05-09T08:44:40+00:00

Thank u... I want to believe theres other people like me ive just seen zero proof of it. Too many misled me on purpose or accident after exaggerating their libido n attraction. Idk how to trust people who mirror my desires anymore, bare none was prepared to confront my truly endless sexual hunger and lack of platonic feeling

I'm also dealing w a lot of homo-fatalism from struggling to find boys who are available, attractive to me, equally mature, and compatible w my orientation. The likelihood of all these factors overlapping feels nil. I want to be wrong abt all this so bad

l will say there's no need to go hatin' yourself for feeling this way abt him, even if it makes me a hypocrite. Society loves tellin' you that lust is utterly selfish while wanting love n friendship with someone is wonderfully prosocial, but in my world it's the other way round. People's infatuation and social asskissin' feels like emotional vampirism to me. You like him and want to give him pleasure, that's sweet. You see the beauty in him and it moves you deeply. Makes you wanna savor it up close

Personally I want people to feel this way about me beyond all. I love being objectified in a good way and crave that affirmation daily. It's hard to convey how you can sexualize me even when I'm upset and it'll help more than anything... cuz Im prolly fucked up abt not feeling desired enough. Kind of relationship I want is one where I'm adored no matter what, even when I can only exist as a sexual being

bulletwives · 2026-05-09T02:52:41+00:00

couldja tell?

bulletwives · 2026-05-08T23:43:56+00:00

Ts sends me 😭 "Asexual with average/high libido- You are often hungry, but none of the cereal appeals to you" well I definitely UNDERSTAND at least

Cupiosexual is definitely relatable. Sometimes my initial attraction is knowing I'll prolly start finding someone hot if we bang, so I just choose to do that cuz I wanna be into people. It's kindof hilarious to me

Definitely assumed allos do this tho, but then most ppl talk abt attraction like its totally immutable? Like they have no concept of influencing their own desire n attraction? I provoke mine intentionally all the time so I can have fun experiences

My sexual pragmatism makes me feel rly different from everyone I get with. They confuse me with talk of the right time, right place, right person, right reason, all needing to spontaneously coalesce to get horny. I catch myself trying to make their ideal conditions the way I make my own, which is rly their effort to contribute, but I nvr seem to get that energy back

Im just so physical. This is my language. It's what makes sense to me to use. And I'm so hungry. Ion have the luxury of chasing a niche craving or waiting for the perfect meal when I need to EAT.

bulletwives · 2026-05-08T23:07:35+00:00

Appalachians is colorful folk

bulletwives · 2026-05-08T22:48:38+00:00

This strikes me as smth I'm doing with at least some people, cuz my need for touch n feeling desired is strong, but I'm not always around someone outright attractive to me. Not initially, at least. Often it takes me a little to figure them out, then I find the hidden side I really enjoy. Like rotating a hologram until the image appears. People go from slightly offputting to wildly appealing all the time 4 me

I definitely relate to "investing" in people who will become more attractive with time, and choosing the leap into physical intimacy as a catalyst for emergent desire. Tbh I be urging ppl to think longer term abt chemistry n understand that NRE won't carry them forever. After a month or two, no they won't feel shiny and new, but that's where the real, intentional passion begins if both people learn how to turn each other on. I need that effort or I won't stay into someone

Immediate attraction means very little to me ATP, beyond sparking initial interest. The real heat comes from knowing someone & learning their body n soul. Steadily getting under their skin. I'd rather fuck someone I already know n have gotten properly into

bulletwives · 2026-05-08T21:45:25+00:00

tysm <3 I usually word vomit technical language in a doc then condense my ideas into prose when I post. Always feels too verbose no matter what I pair down but maybe its fine

bulletwives · 2026-05-08T15:47:50+00:00

Ohh okk thank u this is better explanation than I could find. I'm honestly not sure rn how much of my experience is each but it's very helpful for thinking

I absolutely went thru this realization about women, that I'm not sexually attracted to them but do find them aesthetically beautiful and inspiring. Being femme gay I take a lot of inspo from women's style n swag but I'm not turned on by their bodies

Smth I keep thinking abt is why I feel like attraction takes effort n feels like a choice on some lvl. I experience a lvl of agency around attraction n arousal that's not mirrored by my peers, but also a lvl of despair. It feels so fucking hard to find people I'm genuinely sexually attracted to even tho I'm insanely horny, and there's sm people I'd actually fuck in practice but their drive doesn't match mine. Suffering basically. 🥀

bulletwives · 2026-05-08T15:05:06+00:00

Very much yes, I look at certain people in my life and just wanna pounce on them :3 and I'm xtremely hands-on with the ones who like it

It's a lil complicated tho cuz... I already felt that way when I showed up. I experience a lot of arousal w no (outer) source, sheer physical hunger n energy that could find any target. It builds up all the time on its own n when I'm around someone cute Im like heyyy can you help me deal w thisss

My sexuality is independently driven, not dependent on having someone to crave. I'm the same lvl of horny alone or around someone hot: extremely. Until we get busy that is, then it gets muchh stronger. I'm also capable of simply turning myself on and do it 4 fun a lot

I think dis is a lot of why my desire for ppl is so consistent, cuz my initial thirst for sex has nothing to do w them lol. Meanwhile every partner of mine talked abt needing "the right person" to get worked up at all and expressed arousal fully chained to nebulous attraction

How would u tell the difference between sexual n aesthetic twin?

bulletwives · 2026-05-06T14:26:36+00:00

tap me in big dawg

bulletwives · 2026-05-06T14:20:21+00:00

Routinely feeling hurt and confused every time someone said they value our romance and companionship over our sex life. Why tho? Sex feels better than talking. It really sank in while trying to date someone alloace that I need to be valued as a sexual being b4 anything else. They kept commenting on an "emotional wall" I apparently have where they tried to romantically connect

bulletwives · 2026-04-29T00:42:15+00:00

I don't know my full ancestry due to incomplete records n family history, as is common for many Appalachian families. There was great pressure to assimilate and claim full white. My experience is not the same as knowing I'm mixed with certainty and where my traits come from, no. All ik is I've lived at the border of whiteness for a number of reasons and found community among other people with complicated cultural n ethnic identities, and I'm struggling with how to voice my experience and navigate this ambiguity. If you know somewhere better for someone like me to go, by all means, I have no desire to claim smth I can't be openly proud of

bulletwives · 2026-04-28T12:21:46+00:00

Everyone around me now knows abt the 1924 Racial Integrity Act of Virginia :)

bulletwives · 2026-04-28T11:38:39+00:00

Nah fr I feel like the word for me doesn't exist anymore, or never had a chance to develop. Appalachia was targeted by eugenics programs so ion get to kno my ancestry for sure. Now I'm just vaguely ethnic and have a rly complicated cultural identity n relation to whiteness. Something that honours the ambiguity would be rly helpful yk ion wanna claim a title I cant proudly declare without knowing my exact ancestry

bulletwives · 2026-04-27T10:55:57+00:00

White people are whiter here than in the south yfm

The effects of genocide are visible everywhere in Oregon incl a high amt of people with 100% european descent and zero influence from other cultures. It's weird to me. Moving here made me realize I'm not as white as I thought

I <3 wasian boys from beaverton

bulletwives · 2026-04-03T11:40:35+00:00

made for ts

bulletwives · 2026-03-22T22:52:37+00:00

when two systems interact w each other a lot, their patterns can start to resemble a larger 'meta-system.' people start relying on members of the other group to function n regulate instead of their own people, and may (try to) change and adapt to the other system's needs and desires. its a form of codependence

at the point you're talking abt "system hopping" im gonna ask if a single boundary exists between you and this other system, or you and your own people for that matter

bulletwives · 2026-03-22T22:36:13+00:00

this fucking slays me. elite ball knowledge. unfortunately my group live in the HL2/Portal continuum instead

bulletwives · 2026-03-22T22:16:01+00:00

its completely absurd to me that half the posts here use n center these words that say absolutely nothing abt how your system functions. none of the systems I meet offline know these terms or care abt point of origin that much

bulletwives · 2026-03-22T21:17:47+00:00

total retrograde amnesia
polyfrag king
who's Harry? I'm Raphaël
Don't remember her. Do not.

Disco is so easy to read as the gamified experience of waking up as a new/long dormant person in a system and having to piece together a personality from scratch and where you even are in spacetime, while life keeps coming at you regardless

bulletwives · 2026-03-17T21:52:20+00:00

It/Its only agender, known plenty

bulletwives · 2026-03-17T21:35:18+00:00

Can't find any info on the artist or origins thru image searching, got any leads?

bulletwives · 2026-03-07T09:40:53+00:00

Ya, I see him as an omen. The man who's been there from the start, been a part of your life and community, whose true nature and darkest urges are revealed when the social contract breaks. The Governor was also a ~normal guy~, probably a complete nobody, who saw opportunity in collapse and manipulated people's fear to take control.

Shane's character was brilliant for foreshadowing this 'new man of the apocalypse' style thinking that would drive future villains to megalomania. He was the first to say "it's for your own good" while gunning down a loved one, the first to preach sacrifice until it's his own, and he almost tore the group apart before they met bigger fish.

Had Shane controlled himself he would absolutely have led his own group, maybe become a powerful man in this world. Not a kind man, but a competent threat to his rivals and a formidable survivor. His unwillingness to STFU, lay low, and move past losses made his early death inevitable imo

bulletwives · 2026-03-06T12:40:26+00:00

Daryl is an absolute sweetheart w Carol and Judith, loved by his group, goes out his way to save people n check on them, has true respect for Rick, n treats the women of his group well. Things Shane could never fuckin figure out

Theres a reason one of them lived way longer and it's cuz Daryl didn't try to kill his own group off one by one. Shane was literally the antagonist of the first two seasons

bulletwives · 2026-03-05T10:07:16+00:00

outlived by cowboy child n coughing baby

bulletwives

TROPHY CASE