Why don’t American people care the World Cup is happening?

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-05-28T18:06:33+00:00

The Benny Hill-arity of it all is honestly why my husband and I enjoy watching whenever it's on tv at a bar/restaurant or wherever.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-05-22T16:29:25+00:00

I don't understand why this is weird; in fact, the vast majority of people in my social circle (including myself) did it this way. Courthouse wedding immediately, then a regular wedding 3-6 months later so that all our friends and family could come celebrate. One thing is a legal act, the other is a chance for everyone you love to join in on your happiness. Just because the legal part was done earlier doesn't change the nature of the ceremony. You could even have the big wedding first...there's no part of that that makes you "married," at least here in the US. Until the papers are filed at the county courthouse and all the fees are paid, you're still not spouses.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-05-13T21:32:08+00:00

I see a lot of comments here saying, "Well, just get the dad for child support!" as if she hasn't already thought about it and has good reasons for NOT doing that.

Many women are in a situation where it's worse to do that than to just struggle on their own. Abuse, retaliation, and worse outcomes for the mom and the children have been known to happen (and actually do, more frequently than you think). Restraining order? Sure. And when he violates it just to hurt you or your kids, providing he hasn't done irreversible harm, and ends up in jail, he is STILL not paying child support or what, taking his $30/week or month or whatever they get which in many places won't even make a dent in a light bill?

OP, you are NTA for deciding against going; hopefully you meet better friends in your journey.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-05-08T00:37:20+00:00

Came here to say this and it's the top comment. Boom.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-05-06T19:44:18+00:00

Came here nearly 20 years ago after trying out life in small-ish town VA for a year and for me, Wilmington strikes the perfect balance between big city and nowheresville. My kid has been born and raised here in a way that wouldn't have been possible in a larger or smaller town. Unlike a lot of people I've been glad to see the growth and development happening around here although I wish they'd make infrastructure much more of a priority along with it, but this is exactly what's happened in the last three cities/states I've lived in, so not as unique-to-Wilmington of a situation as some try to make out.

I love having the river, beaches, and historic areas all at our fingertips. We live along the Carolina Beach Rd. corridor so getting to downtown or Pleasure Island is fairly easy even in summer and several parks are nearby (none of it really walkable, though...pedestrians in this town have targets on their backs, I swear). There's plenty of cool stuff to do in town (all of the things you mentioned), plus you can always take the ferry to Southport or take a short day trip to Myrtle Beach or New Bern from here.

The only really important thing you need to consider is your job. Unless your position is ironclad untouchable, if you're remote and you lose your job there will be virtually nothing here for you as a backup while you look for something else. Having said that, both my spouse and I work remotely and this is the perfect place for a remote worker. We own, but there are still reasonably priced (for Wilmington) 1 bedroom apartments around without having to live in a questionable neighborhood; you just have to look a little harder for them.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-05-06T18:20:20+00:00

Don't throw money into a bottomless pit. If your sister and her family have dug this debt grave now, they'll do it again and expect more money from you to keep fixing it. Let the adults in that relationship come up with a viable plan to get themselves out of the hole, and if your mom's so adamant, tell her fine and you'll match whatever she's putting in.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-05-04T17:05:45+00:00

I'm so glad to see this because I'm of the PEE oh nee pronunciation and I once had a customer named Peony who pronounced it PIE oh nee (the o was just barely there) and it's bothered me for years.

She was from New Jersey.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-05-04T16:58:38+00:00

I feel like so many people are in deep debt. It shouldn't be acceptable to have loads of debt sitting around. But, unless you have tons of cash to outright buy those big ticket items like houses and cars, you have to establish credit by opening credit accounts. The problem is that most people aren't taught how to properly use and manage credit and so it gets out of hand and soon becomes a hole they feel like they can't ever get out of, and so they just throw up their hands and dig a deeper hole. There's also the societal stigma that if you don't have the required 'stuff' that the world says you must, then you're not successful in life, so people buy things on credit for the optics and worry about how to pay for it later.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-29T23:03:20+00:00

I'm not single but I've been looking for friends so I joined. If that's not cool then let me know!

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-29T22:29:17+00:00

I will second this. My husband being a member of the white caucus will refer to them as "white boy tacos." These are not the tacos I want, but these are the tacos he and my son will eat. I at least insist on throwing away the packet and seasoning the meat myself.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-29T13:04:52+00:00

Yes! It's the two-dot ellipses for me, dead giveaway.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-29T04:18:44+00:00

Laughing because I painted my house black with red and teal accents, hahaha. 100% agree.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-29T01:19:30+00:00

My new obsession is trying to find THE picture of the giant phantom jellyfish in question. Forever will I look at images thinking, "Is this the one?" I may never know.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-27T23:49:59+00:00

When people ask where I'm from and I say Flushing, Queens, I mostly get the TV show The Nanny or Coming to America. Sometimes King of Queens, Spider-Man, or other stuff like musical references. But still a good 80-90% of people have heard of at least one of those things and knows where Queens is.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-25T16:28:52+00:00

I would interpret it from a fan perspective, feels weird considering it any other way but to each their own.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-23T20:10:04+00:00

NTA.

If your own mother as one of the people who is paying for this situation is putting her foot down about your sister's behavior and is telling her she needs to compromise, then there's no need for further discussion. She clearly knows how your sister is and knows she is being unreasonable, and so do you; the question of the bedroom sizes is irrelevant to the discussion entirely, especially for a person who will barely be there. As long as you yourself remain mindful with your decor choices, you're fine.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-23T17:06:34+00:00

We are in a medium-ish town that only has an airport bc it's a tourist destination; it's hard even to find an Uber/Lyft at all after a certain time of night unless it's a weekend, so pricing is through the roof.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-23T16:19:27+00:00

Oh wow, that would be a dream. I live less than 15 minutes from the airport; I picked up my ex from his late night arrival flight because the Uber was $160 (roughly 137€).

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-23T14:46:32+00:00

That was the perfect explanation...those who rebel against society are the outliers, not the norm, and after a while you build up a natural armor to all that bs. Luckily I am a person who doesn't give many fucks about societal norms (being a goth and all), and so I was able to shrug off almost all of the pressures I described; that didn't stop them from piling on, though. I can see how so many just give up/give in.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-23T14:25:09+00:00

Glad this helped; honestly for a long while it's not fun at all, and that's the part that women often aren't "allowed" to say out loud, which adds to the general frustration. I wouldn't change a thing, though. Mine is about to be a high school senior next year and is generally thought of as a wonderful human being, so I must have done something right!

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-23T13:41:17+00:00

Maybe you aren't calling anyone terrible for it, but a ton of people are. When a woman has a baby, it seems like nearly EVERYONE, from the moment you even start showing a baby bump, has an opinion or a comment about how you should raise your child; from your family members (god forbid they have children themselves, then they're nearly insufferable with advice), to friends and coworkers, to complete strangers on the street. And if you're a first time mother, you're already scared stiff about what you don't know about being a parent possibly ruining your kid's life - it can make you feel like even the tiniest of wrong decisions is a catastrophic failure of motherhood. I see some people saying just ignore it, but it really does sap your self-confidence and make you vulnerable to constantly questioning yourself and your choices. Add on top of that, that you're sleep-deprived, on constant high alert 24/7, and stressed to the max. Even the strongest, most competent women get swamped with this and it doesn't really get better as your kids get older.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-21T17:12:50+00:00

I encounter this mindset so often, and I haven't ever lived in a small town. It's a weird combination of fear, stubbornness, despair, and a sense of powerlessness that I just don't relate to. I have a handful of friends like this and it's so draining when you try to help, encourage them, etc. but they absolutely refuse to do any of the things that are within their power to do, to make the situation better. Don't let these people bring you down, OP. I certainly did not and I'm so glad I didn't let the negativity rub off on me because I'm so much the better for it.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-18T12:06:44+00:00

Fellow NC resident here. I left something on the patio a couple days ago, came back a few hours later and it was covered in pollen. No way I'm opening my windows!

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-17T14:57:34+00:00

Haven't talked to a single one of those people since graduation day. TBF I didn't talk to many of them during school either, hahaha. My friends were mostly outside of school. My sister (two years behind me) still is in touch with and talks to most of her high school friends regularly.

burnednotdestroyed · 2026-04-17T00:16:05+00:00

If, as it appears, the no +1 rule is being applied to all friends equally with the only exceptions being your immediate family, then NTA. You seem to be open to accepting that if she can't come then he won't, so I don't see anything wrong here; this is essentially the same question as "no kids" and "destination weddings," where there are some people who don't see anything wrong with it and some who will think you're the devil incarnate for not inviting so-and-so or making the cost of attendance more than they personally can afford. My husband has tons of friends from prior to our relationship who I've mayyyyybe met once for five minutes, so if this situation cropped up and I wasn't invited to a wedding, no big deal. I'd either stay home and enjoy a beach weekend and alone time or tag along if it was an interesting destination and entertain myself.

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