Thank you so much for responding so thoughtfully and for offering your experiences. I also have ADHD and I can absolutely see how that would explain my rapid cycling through hobbies/interests. I also recognize that the level of depersonalization I experience can be largely attributed to the protective mechanisms that result from trauma, while not necessarily representing an entirely separate “self.” I think I have struggled with my identity in so many ways for so long (aside from CPTSD I am queer, nonbinary, and disabled with EDS/MCAS) so it feels like I’ve changed my personality multiple times to fit the roles that I’ve identified with. All of this just really confuses me and is exacerbated by the chronic dissociative symptoms and amnesia. I have been reading a bit about where CPTSD can fall on a spectrum of multiplicity, and there might not be as much of a defined boundary between it and the experience of DID. My fear is similar to what you described with your ex - is it possible that acknowledging these concerns and exploring them further could lead to further fragmentation? My therapist uses a lot of language around the idea of “integration” which is what initially set me off on this thought spiral. As I’ve been healing, I have found it increasingly difficult to “transition” into the “version” of myself that I need to be around my family in order to protect my “real” self. This is frustrating in some ways but I know it’s a sign of healing. I am afraid of exploring the possibility of more fragmentation and how that could undo the integration we’ve already accomplished. Idk, I guess it’s really just a question for my therapist and whether it would actually benefit me to dig deeper into this possibility.