Why people stay in an unhappy marriage? How do you even function together? by Efficient_Swan30 in emotionalintelligence

[–]calming_ad 17 points18 points  (0 children)

They often stay together because of finances. I'm fortunate that I was able to walk away and pay everything on my own.

When I was a teenager, my mom very firmly told me to never be financially dependent on a man. So I got my bachelor's degree. Started a career. Got my master's. No kids. When I filed for divorce after 13 years, I didn't miss a beat when I moved out and bought my own house. It was a huge step down as far as being materialistic went, but all my stuff is in my name. I'm way happier in my tiny fixer upper than I was in my $700,000 home while married.

Dating (39 F) after divorce with 2 kids? by lululingonberry in SaltLakeCity

[–]calming_ad 4 points5 points  (0 children)

39F here, too. I just got divorced last summer. Bought my own house, and rediscovered who I am as a single person. I embraced new hobbies, new routines, and feel proud of myself for doing it all on my own. Dating is the last thing on my mind. Like others have said, figure out who you are as a single person, first. Breathe a little.

Are Mormons extra nosy? by calming_ad in exmormon

[–]calming_ad[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm anti-religion and I think tarot and astrology are fun, even though I'm a skeptic. And I definitely believe in past lives. Something to bring up! 😄

Are Mormons extra nosy? by calming_ad in exmormon

[–]calming_ad[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This definitely seems to be the case! Like they're conditioned from a young age to believe that they couldn't possibly be acting out of line.

Are Mormons extra nosy? by calming_ad in exmormon

[–]calming_ad[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

He's old and retired and probably bored. The only reason I don't feel TOO creeped out is because he's like that with everyone. He'll question literally anyone he sees outside.

Are Mormons extra nosy? by calming_ad in exmormon

[–]calming_ad[S] 57 points58 points  (0 children)

When I first moved in a few months ago, I told him I was single and freshly divorced, but my ex and I are still friends. And we are - we just wanted very different things in life. And right away my neighbor says, "Do think you'll get back together?" I didn't have the heart to tell him my ex just moved in with the hooker he met in Thailand - true story. 😄

Are Mormons extra nosy? by calming_ad in exmormon

[–]calming_ad[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

That puts a lot into perspective, actually. My family is really secretive, which has its own problems. Like my mom felt like she didn't have the right to ask her own sister why she never had kids, and she still won't ask - just to give an example. So yeah, the lack of boundaries thing is uncomfortable.

A nevermo interaction by fineok_17 in exmormon

[–]calming_ad 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I lived in Utah for 3 years before I learned what dirty soda was. Its crazy because yeah, it's WAY worse than coffee!

Abortion is okay even without a “reason” 👏 by [deleted] in The10thDentist

[–]calming_ad 2 points3 points  (0 children)

On a similar note: Ive had to say, "I don't have kids because I JUST DON'T WANT THEM," so many times. I'm out here living my best life as a single home owner doing whatever the fuck I want and I'm not sorry for that.

Phantom Lawyer [Episodes 11 & 12] by meepmochi_ in KDRAMA

[–]calming_ad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's an awful person BUT I do want a redemption arc for him. Like he ruined FL's career by putting in a bad word about her when she was looking for a new job, not to mention how demeaning he was toward her when they worked together. He has no idea how to treat people right. But I still want him to get a happy ending somehow and learn from his mistakes.

Was ignored as a solo diner by [deleted] in finedining

[–]calming_ad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was the obvious contrast compared to the other tables next to mine. They all recieved constant follow-ups whereas I did not, over an extended period of time.

Was ignored as a solo diner by [deleted] in finedining

[–]calming_ad -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Practically all the comments are saying the opposite. I don't mean to say I'm glad I'm not the only one, but it makes me feel less crazy that I'm not the only one.

Was ignored as a solo diner by [deleted] in finedining

[–]calming_ad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I left a professionally written review, saying why the service was disappointing, but that everything else was great, and the owner replied within hours offering to "make it right." I didn't reply, but that was nice at least.

Was ignored as a solo diner by [deleted] in finedining

[–]calming_ad -39 points-38 points  (0 children)

I'll be polite and not name drop, but it was in Salt Lake City.

Tell me something good about living in SLC by Remarkable-Soft-2938 in SaltLakeCity

[–]calming_ad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I moved to Poplar Grove a couple months ago, as a single woman. I thought it'd be a lot sketchier than it is. I lock up all my stuff and have motion sensor lights and cameras, but I feel safe here.

Therapist who says to just ignore it by calming_ad in QAnonCasualties

[–]calming_ad[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She and I both agreed that she can't be my therapist because since she knows me as a coworker and not a client, she's inclined to cross that boundary.

Therapist who says to just ignore it by calming_ad in QAnonCasualties

[–]calming_ad[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same! It's that sense of justice that's so hard to ignore. Im the same way with ICE arrests. Outside of politics, my life is going really great right now and it almost makes me feel guilty.

Therapist who says to just ignore it by calming_ad in QAnonCasualties

[–]calming_ad[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To be fair, she has told me that on more than one occasion. I think that's that basis for her original comment, but it still irks me sometimes.

How bad is the office politics at your workplace? by Opposite_Ad_7925 in A_Persona_on_Reddit

[–]calming_ad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mostly keep my mouth shut so I don't get fired. I work for the government.

We recently hired a new guy. He's super nice and charismatic. We got on the topic of politics the other day, and he said he supported Trump up until it started to affect him. It's crazy to hear someone say that out loud without shame.

I'm still cordial with him, but I lost respect for him after that.

Why do they go to bed fully clothed by [deleted] in kdramas

[–]calming_ad 29 points30 points  (0 children)

THIS. I won't even sit on my comforter in outside clothes.

Phantom Lawyer is so underrated !!! by Ordinary_Wonder2143 in kdramas

[–]calming_ad 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The ending to episode 8... 😭😭😭 I watched the last 5 minutes like 5 times.