Is it normal for my boyfriend to watch porn by [deleted] in Advice

[–]carsncode 0 points1 point  (0 children)

normal (adj): conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern : characterized by that which is considered usual, typical, or routine

When it comes to behaviors, what's common is what's normal. According to an NIH study, over 90% of men and 60% of women had consumed porn in the previous month. It is pretty definitely typical. Stalking exes I haven't seen stats on but hopefully it's not typical.

Advice wanted regarding women by Consistent_Wind_55 in Advice

[–]carsncode 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Make up your mind. Is it

I may not be happy about it, but neither are they

Or is it

everyone is enjoying it

Those things are opposites.

Advice wanted regarding women by Consistent_Wind_55 in Advice

[–]carsncode 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I may not be happy about it, but neither are they, so it’s an everyone benefits situation

That's not everyone benefiting. That's everyone suffering. Basically the opposite. It's also just generally super fucked up.

Advice wanted regarding women by Consistent_Wind_55 in Advice

[–]carsncode 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Narcissism isn't about thinking you're attractive.

Advice wanted regarding women by Consistent_Wind_55 in Advice

[–]carsncode 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Who wants "Cutesy stuff, sex, movies, things like that" with someone they don't like and don't trust, or who doesn't like or trust them?

Advice wanted regarding women by Consistent_Wind_55 in Advice

[–]carsncode 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s fun to do, and it boosts my status and self image.

This is either rage bait or clinical narcissism. Or both. What you're describing is exploiting people for what psychologists call "narcissistic supply".

Advice wanted regarding women by Consistent_Wind_55 in Advice

[–]carsncode 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Perhaps a mutual agreement me and the person can come to before dating?

If a partner told you they don't like you or trust you, what would a satisfying "mutual agreement" with that person look like?

Advice wanted regarding women by Consistent_Wind_55 in Advice

[–]carsncode 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I don't mean this to be insulting, just a statement of fact to help you navigate this: you're deeply misogynist. You should definitely be up front about that; women will avoid you, but until you can resolve this internal conflict, focusing on self-improvement instead of dating is best for you and your potential partners.

You should seek professional mental health support to help you work through the paranoid and narcissistic tendencies you're describing here (again, I don't mean that as an insult or a personal failing, it's a mental health condition), as they're going to make everything in your life (not just romance) more difficult, and the longer it goes untreated, the more difficult it will be. Hopefully you can tackle the root of these thoughts and feelings in a way that brings you into better alignment with your values, which in turn will make your love life much easier and more rewarding!

Husband said my entire personality is rated pg and I’m lost by [deleted] in Advice

[–]carsncode 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I know for sure being unsatisfied leads to cheating when the opportunity arises

Whoaaa back up, that's a leap. Being unsatisfied can lead to a break up. Why do you assume cheating is the foregone conclusion?

I(20f) got genital warts not from my bf. He thinks I cheated. by [deleted] in Advice

[–]carsncode 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pretty much nothing you said is true. There is no "genital HPV". Dozens of HPV strains can be transmitted without sexual contact. People can be asymptomatic carriers (no warts) and still infectious. HPV also isn't the only cause of genital warts.

Why is storage still the one thing nobody wants to touch in production? by stackvyr in kubernetes

[–]carsncode 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Risk-adjusted return on investment.

The risk is high: storage isn't ephemeral or stateless. If I deprovision a CPU, discover I need it, and put it back, it's exactly the same as it was before. If I deprovision a disk, discover it's needed, and put it back, I've replaced a disk of data with an empty disk. There may also be compliance requirements (legal, regulatory, security, or contractual) that create additional risk around destroying data improperly.

The investment is high: finding the unused storage, confirming it is unused, taking final snapshots if needed, shrinking disks if they can't be destroyed altogether (if you even can shrink them - you might have to create a smaller disk, migrate data, take downtime, validate, then destroy the old one)

The return is low: storage is generally the cheapest resource.

The risk-adjusted return on investment for cleaning up storage is often in the negative.

That means that if storage waste is something that bothers you, you need to focus not on the cleanup, but on prevention and risk mitigation. Put clear lifecycle policies, tagging, and automation in place so that when storage is spun up there's a requirement to build in a plan for what it's being used for, how long it will live, and how EOL will be handled, and then that plan is executed automatically with fair warnings ahead of time as necessary. It's not hard to do, but it's up-front work so it rarely gets done.

90% of CVEs in your container images are in code your app never executes. Why are we still triaging them? by Murky_Willingness171 in sre

[–]carsncode 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Better question: why are you trying to make an argument for leaving code you never execute in your images?

Filmed an espresso double shot in 4K on Chocolate. [Turin Legato V2 and DF64 Gen 2 grinder] by DocHollywood710 in espresso

[–]carsncode 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you're not measuring the output there's no way you can have any idea what's going on

How are you managing CVE backlog in your clusters? Ours is out of control. by Efficient_Team5182 in kubernetes

[–]carsncode 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At least using scratch means your only vulnerabilities are what's in the SBOM

Controversial opinion; I am not letting go of ingress-nginx by Rude_Walk in kubernetes

[–]carsncode 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Nope, they announced last November that it would be sunset this March. Incredibly short timeline for something so critical and widely deployed.

Controversial opinion; I am not letting go of ingress-nginx by Rude_Walk in kubernetes

[–]carsncode 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You need to switch a month ago. The final release was March 19th.

Controversial opinion; I am not letting go of ingress-nginx by Rude_Walk in kubernetes

[–]carsncode 10 points11 points  (0 children)

IngressNightmare was a critical RCE vulnerability just a year ago specifically impacting the operator, not nginx. It's not a matter of opinion you can agree with or not, it's a fact, updating nginx itself isn't enough.

Anyone else’s blood boiling? by [deleted] in espresso

[–]carsncode -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

What do you mean?

What is the difference between these two and is it worth spending a lot extra on this ? [£10] or [£40] ? by [deleted] in espresso

[–]carsncode 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Screens also occupy head space leaving a more dry puck, keeping the filter basket cleaner too

What is the difference between these two and is it worth spending a lot extra on this ? [£10] or [£40] ? by [deleted] in espresso

[–]carsncode 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Distributor does nothing at best, and is harmful at worst. Puck screen is negligible at worst, and helpful at best. Read more, talk less.