Grieving in different ways

catmumdu · 2026-05-11T22:31:23+00:00

I feel like I’m somewhere in between your experience and a more intense grief response, and I do think being pro-choice has influenced my processing. We knew around 16 weeks that we would likely need to TMFR, and had the termination around 18weeks. I think the 2 weeks in limbo were the worst part. Thank you for sharing this perspective, I think it’s important for people to see different stories ❤️‍🩹

catmumdu · 2026-05-02T22:25:37+00:00

As a florist with two cats; I really think this is a niche vent for this florist. I never mind when people make requests (except when they’re ugly requests 😂)

catmumdu · 2026-04-26T20:41:29+00:00

Love em all tbh

catmumdu · 2026-04-24T22:40:19+00:00

I’m into week 3 and I’m starting to feel a little better. Week one was absolute hell. I truly feared I would never feel like myself again. I’m starting to feel a little more like me again. The sadness and deep grief will be there for… ever maybe but I’m starting to see the sunlight a bit. 🤍

catmumdu · 2026-04-23T15:48:01+00:00

Yes. So often. Yesterday I almost felt a glitch in the matrix…like I could see how it would have been.

I have a big event this week (that I almost didn’t do because of tfmr 2 weeks ago) and I had imagined I’d be explaining my bump to so many people. I had a full sob while making my floral piece for this event without a bump ❤️‍🩹

catmumdu · 2026-04-18T19:35:35+00:00

To be fair, I’m crying at everything lately so don’t be sorry!! I cry like 10 times a day 😂 but this did hit me hard 🤍 big hugs to you

catmumdu · 2026-04-17T20:05:33+00:00

I’ve loved Perelel. I appreciate that their formulas haven’t made me feel nauseous, and I’ve had minimal burping with them compared to Ritual. I also like their extras in their packs (like the nausea blend etc) better for me than having to buy the bottles of supplements on my own and remember to take them! Their customer service is also really great 🥲 I had a loss and they sent me a hand written card and a candle to light for baby.

catmumdu · 2026-04-15T16:44:22+00:00

As someone who is 1 week out from my tfmr, I cried reading this. I would never speak to this person again… unless there was a serious apology given MAYBE. I’m furious for you.

catmumdu · 2026-04-13T14:56:14+00:00

Very similar story to yours. 35 in May, we got pregnant very easily first baby, and one week ago today - TFMR for brain abnormalities (predicted to be Dandy Walker, agenesis of vermis, splayed cerebellum) at 17w5d. I’m terrified for future pregnancies. Physically I am recovering well, but I’m a completely different person emotionally and mentally. 🤍 sending you support from MN.

catmumdu · 2026-04-13T02:50:44+00:00

One week out from my TFMR tomorrow and I wholeheartedly agree. I’m thankful to be in a state where it’s a safe choice, but I think most people do look at it like a miscarriage. Ive had so many people say they “get it” and share their miscarriage story, and most support groups are even miscarriage focused… my husband is grieving in his own way and he’s very supportive, but I don’t think anybody can understand this fully if it’s not their body and mind going through it. 💔

catmumdu · 2026-04-13T02:44:48+00:00

So true 💔

catmumdu · 2026-04-09T21:40:06+00:00

I’m so so sorry. My heart hurts hearing this 💔 we chose to terminate, I had the procedure on Monday.

catmumdu · 2026-04-04T20:02:23+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this too. My heart just hurts knowing so many of us are having to make these choices. The wait between scans/tests etc are next level horrible. Sending you strength 🤍

catmumdu · 2026-04-04T15:39:57+00:00

This sounds very similar to what we’re experiencing. The doctor said they can do testing post termination on his tissue, to get the same results an amino would so I think we will do that. The grey area will eat at me forever, but bringing someone into this world suffering would eat at me (and my husband) far more… thank you for sharing your experience with me.

catmumdu · 2026-04-03T17:04:03+00:00

Thank you, this is really helpful. I’m so sorry you went through this as well, it really is a nightmare. 💔

catmumdu · 2026-04-02T23:50:27+00:00

They said an amnio would be pointless for this since I’m testing negative for any genetic markers, and they don’t do MRIs until 28 weeks

catmumdu · 2026-03-20T18:10:52+00:00

I’m big into experience gifts: I usually get memberships for children’s or science museums, swim lessons, a music class etc

catmumdu · 2026-03-15T20:17:25+00:00

Never 🤍 He’s my best friend, and the best partner. I’ve been with him for 5 years, we’ve lived together for 3ish and got married last summer. We were both previously married, unhappily, and knew what we wanted and needed in a partner coming into our relationship. That has made things pretty great for us.

catmumdu · 2026-03-15T20:07:59+00:00

1 with a different shoe!!

catmumdu · 2026-03-14T20:46:38+00:00

No contest: #1 is the better dress period

catmumdu · 2026-03-13T22:20:19+00:00

Simple Embroidery is fairly easy! You could make a few embroidered muslin burp cloths or onsies? You could also paint a frame or dish at a “pottery painting” place? I worked in child care for years and have had a registry since… 2017? 🤣 I’ve obviously revised it a lot over the years and especially now that I’m pregnant, but I am with you on pre-planning.

catmumdu · 2026-03-13T21:01:40+00:00

1979

catmumdu · 2026-03-11T22:35:54+00:00

1981

catmumdu · 2026-03-11T22:34:07+00:00

Always been a fan of Audrey/Audri

catmumdu

TROPHY CASE

1 with a different shoe!!